similar background = better compatability?

Jagraf

I think people in general, who do a degree in their late teens, and are still even talking about it in their thirties (and assessing compatibility and relationships based on it) quite sad. Surely by your thirties you have done so much more with your life one way or another, good and bad, interesting and laughable, silly and down right stupid, that your degree is immaterial?

I can only think of it being of use on your CV.

It's like my sixteen year old talking about when she won the egg and spoon race. Relevant at the time no doubt, but of no real interest to her now. Although I won it in the mums race too, which I drop in to every conversation I can.

onlyroz

Jagraf wrote: »

My husband is atheist, I am Christian

Does it bother you that your husband won't be going to heaven, and so you'll spend the afterlife without him?

TopQuark

Jagraf wrote: »

I think people in general, who do a degree in their late teens, and are still even talking about it in their thirties (and assessing compatibility and relationships based on it) quite sad. Surely by your thirties you have done so much more with your life one way or another, good and bad, interesting and laughable, silly and down right stupid, that your degree is immaterial?

I can only think of it being of use on your CV.

It's like my sixteen year old talking about when she won the egg and spoon race. Relevant at the time no doubt, but of no real interest to her now. Although I won it in the mums race too, which I drop in to every conversation I can.

Made me LOL :rotfl:

cats2012

I haven't read every post but I was/am very "academic" and did an Economics degree at a high ranked uni - but my husband didn't even do A Levels! We're been together 7 years in total. Admittedly though, he does like "academic" things, like he's a bit of a maths geek, likes reading, likes documentaries etc etc. So I guess we do have a lot in common.

My sister is the same - she's a vet so did 5 years at uni, her long term other half was an apprentice and is now an electrician.

So I think your friends are missing out on a big group of people who are hardworking, ambitious and very clever - plus they also have stuff to talk about that's different from us

Jagraf

onlyroz wrote: »

Does it bother you that your husband won't be going to heaven, and so you'll spend the afterlife without him?

It bothers him more :cool:

chimmo12

I went to university, got my degree, and did a masters degree.
My husband-to-be didn't achieve one pass grade in his GCSE's and has worked since the age of 16.
In terms of educational background we are nothing alike and we also had completely different upbringings and childhoods.

I don't think education has anything to do with how well a relationship will work. I use my education to help him and he uses his to help me. It might not be an academic education, but he has a lot more 'street sense' and common sense than I do!

Goldiegirl

As it happens, my husband and myself are from very similar backgrounds - only children, working class, with dads who were in skilled trades and mums who worked part time outside of the home.


Educationally, broadly similar. We both left school at 16. I left with a stack of O levels and immediately started work in a good office job, with promotion prospects that I was able to take advantage of over the years.


My husband had fewer O levels, but he gained professional qualifications by day release and evening classes - these days you could only enter this profession by having a degree.


I never went out of my way to find somebody with a similar background. We met, and we found out that we had similar attitudes to life, and more importantly similar attitudes to the future.


If I was looking for a partner now, it wouldn't even cross my mind to check his education - at this stage, life experiences are far more interesting and relevant rather than something that happened 40 - 50 years ago!

Mirno

There's a difference between turning someone down because they don't have a degree, and refining a list on a dating website by specifying "must have degree level education".

Dating websites are a numbers game - there are millions of people out there, and you don't have the time to date each of them to find possible matches. So anything that has a good correlation is worth putting in.
Once you accept the fact that there are thousands (if not more) people out there with whom you could be perfectly happy, the fact that you exclude some of those for quick filtering purposes works out. It's better to lose a couple of good fits, and an awful lot of bad fits, than to waste your time.

However, if you're chatting face to face, you can ignore "indicators of compatibility", and just chat to see if they are a match. To judge any individual on those criteria is horrible.

theoretica

If judging people on their life choices is narrow minded and shallow, what about all the judging that goes on about things people can't affect? I wouldn't go out with someone taller/shorter than me sort of thing.

VfM4meplse

Pixie5740 wrote: »

Does keeping an open mind also include keeping your mind open to the possibility that God does not and has not ever existed?

It does, and also keeping your mind open to the possibility that God does exist: the point is that agnostics will admit they don't know! Unlike atheists.

What faith you choose is a matter for the individual, and I personally would prefer someone that did believe in God than someone that doesn't as this shows some commonality (I didn't realise Jesus' doctrine went beyond love thy neighbour, but hey-ho). I wouldn't have any difficulty with an agnostic, but would struggle with a disparaging atheist.