Daring Myself to do this

Kitten868

It's weird. I miss it when I'm not selling. It's nice having those bids coming in and getting money all through the month. With eBay you normally will get a buyer so it's more fun that Facebook. But annoying buyers are such a pain in the bum! I'm getting to the end of the run for a bit. No more stuff to sell. I'm down to clothes pretty much. Having dd2 outgrowing things keeps it all going but not at the same pace.
I'm excited that I'm taking charge of stuff by myself. Normally we do everything together and I just want to prove to myself and my lovely hubby that I can do all this on my own. Dreading work but instead of getting upset I'm doing it on my terms with how much I can manage. Trying to take charge of stuff before it can rule me.
All the clutter everywhere has been taking its toll so seeing it put to use does make me happy x

brizzledfw

"All the clutter everywhere has been taking its toll so seeing it put to use does make me happy x"

Agree kitten. Thats the spirit!

Kitten868

Thank you brizzled!
So tomorrow morning need to get all my listings done. No special offers or deals getting watchers on the wardrobe. Just hope someone buys. Need it out. Probably nothing until the last minute. Just see if I'll hold my nerve til then.
Watching call the midwife. I am so broody. I love babies so much!!
I've ordered some stuff about training for cemap. Only £6.49. See if I like it before I pay out the big bucks. It's all practice exam papers and revision guides so I'll get an idea. Really want to push myself while I've got the quiet lonely evenings. I've got 2 months left of maternity leave. If I like it we shall see how my job likes the idea. Plus my sisters offered me her old accounting books to see if I like that.
Hmmm so retrain and improve my income or have another baby. I do struggle because if I stop now then that's it for me. Hysterectomy. I'm done but I'm not resigned to the idea of more completely. I could be that 19 kids and counting. That's why I'm selling the stuff to make me more resolute. I am rather terrified of middle child syndrome and dd1 has only just stopped thinking when she goes to Nannys I'm going to have a baby. Don't tell anyone though - my mum will kill me and my mil will go batty with excitement. Lol
Feel a bit lost. Shock to the system knowing dd1 is going to preschool come September. And me retraining pathetic x

lilmissmup

I have days where I really don't want anymore kids (have 2 step children as well as DD) because of my horrendous labour but other days I really want one.

I steer more towards being done though, I love DD to pieces but part of me just wants a more adult life back, I want to do things with her as she grows up like cinema trips, ice skating etc and if we had another baby that would push things like that back a bit.

Plus OH's kids cost us a fortune so going on holiday with 4 kids would bankrupt us!

Retraining sounds good, I am hoping I can just get away with doing Usborne forever ha ha

chanie

I'm definitely done with children. I always said I wanted two and I have two. I remember thinking 'I'm done' as soon as I had Dc2. Don't get me wrong, sometimes, I wonder what it would be like to have more, but we don't have the money or space to live the life we'd like to with more children.

lilmiss I hear you about wanting your adult life back. MY DC are 5 and 3 and we feel we are getting to that stage. Dd is out of nappies and due to start school in September, plus the children play together and we don't have to watch them as closely as we used to.

Kitten868

Do apologise. I did respond yesterday but it crashed on me. Maybe for the best. It was a bit long.
I know it's best to stick to two. Best for getting them to clubs and affording what they want. Not having to buy a people carrier. Having an adult life again in my 40s lol. It's fairer for life balance I won't have more - I struggle giving them both enough attention as it is.
Retraining it is xxx

lilmissmup

The thing I struggle with is DD being an "only" child, she isn't, but her half siblings are 13 and nearly 11 so it's a big age gap of 12 and 10 years!

Who knows, maybe in a year or two things might change but right now just her is fine!

Kitten868

And we're back to the little payments as and when I get money making a difference as I've been feeling very overwhelmed. I think it's because I've taken on mine and his debt. Puts it into double figures. Seems a bit black holey again.
Plus I've already managed to get locked out of his internet banking for one of them already which I have no way of rectifying! I put it on paper statements as I had a feeling this would happen. Annoying as I love watching the balances come down.
Like changing it on here too. Xxx

Tjh1412

You'll get there re CeMAP if you'd like any more materials to look at let me know, have soo much bumpf from the IFS atm x

chanie

Sounds good kitten