Buffy's Savings Diary

Pooky

My sister and I have never got on - even when we were kids. Was such a relief when she moved away to Uni as I only had to put up with her for a few weeks during the holidays - she never moved back home and I rarely see her now. We don't phone or text unless there's an emergency.

I know my Mum finds it hard that we don't have a relationship but she realises now that, that's not going to change any time soon. My sister is very career focussed, not for money but for personal satisfaction. She's regularly head hunted and as far as she's concerned work comes before family.

When Mum was in hospital last year and I really could have done with a hand looking after Dad, who was having a complete breakdown but my sister couldn't get to Dads to help him as she had a meeting and was going on holiday the next day. I asked if maybe the holiday could start a few days later (they were camping so not as if they were cancelling flights/hotels) but no, that had been in the schedule since they booked it last year and changing it wasn't an option. She even told me her mobile phone wouldn't work where they were going so she wasn't taking it - she'd phone when she could for an update. 8 days later after Dad had nearly taken his own life and social services and Drs were checking in daily and I was trying to look after my own disabled husband and drive the 100 mile round trip every other day to Dads whilst going into London on the other days to visit Mum, my sister phoned. When I explained what was happening she said she'd "pop in" to Dads on the way back from camping in 5 days time.

Needless to say it didn't improve our relationship. But that's her, she'll never change and why should she - I won't change either. I'm sure I wind her up just as much as she does me.

So strange how kids brought up in the same family can be so different - it really is nature versus nurture.

MrandMrstrying

Hopefully all will be OK good news is that you found it early. Just remember (easier said than done) try not to worry.

On the family side they can be hard to get on with sometimes and for many people they just don't get on. I have found this out from personal experience not on my side.

beanielou

Families can be very hard.
I am truly lucky with my mum and have awesome friends.
The rest well.........

Buffythedebtslayer

Pooky wrote: »

My sister and I have never got on - even when we were kids. Was such a relief when she moved away to Uni as I only had to put up with her for a few weeks during the holidays - she never moved back home and I rarely see her now. We don't phone or text unless there's an emergency.

I know my Mum finds it hard that we don't have a relationship but she realises now that, that's not going to change any time soon. My sister is very career focussed, not for money but for personal satisfaction. She's regularly head hunted and as far as she's concerned work comes before family.

When Mum was in hospital last year and I really could have done with a hand looking after Dad, who was having a complete breakdown but my sister couldn't get to Dads to help him as she had a meeting and was going on holiday the next day. I asked if maybe the holiday could start a few days later (they were camping so not as if they were cancelling flights/hotels) but no, that had been in the schedule since they booked it last year and changing it wasn't an option. She even told me her mobile phone wouldn't work where they were going so she wasn't taking it - she'd phone when she could for an update. 8 days later after Dad had nearly taken his own life and social services and Drs were checking in daily and I was trying to look after my own disabled husband and drive the 100 mile round trip every other day to Dads whilst going into London on the other days to visit Mum, my sister phoned. When I explained what was happening she said she'd "pop in" to Dads on the way back from camping in 5 days time.

Needless to say it didn't improve our relationship. But that's her, she'll never change and why should she - I won't change either. I'm sure I wind her up just as much as she does me.

So strange how kids brought up in the same family can be so different - it really is nature versus nurture.

This makes me feel so better Pooky - that I am not the only one I mean sometimes I think it is impossible, I must be imagining things, I am horrified by your sister's actions and so sorry you had to experience all of that, amazing woman that you are! Have been there with my own sister. When Dad was in hospital she and her bf went home to feed the cat, Mum was left to do all the driving (as I hadn't yet learnt - big regret) and they did nothing, no food shops, no lifts, I got a cab to the hospital most days and then didn't go to work so I could be with Mum and Dad as much as they wanted. In fact I have many stories similar yours, in dire need, any IDIOT could fcuking see but no, routine and own life were far far more important. I convinced myself they were avoiding the reality of the situation but it didn't really make it any easier.

You are right when you say it is strange two people in the same family can be so different. I really don't get it!!

Much love Buffy XXX

Buffythedebtslayer

The doctors was a disaster!

Went in, asked for an appointment, no you have to phone, 5 pm on the dot or 7am.

Oh. So I can't make an appointment here, No, we can get the doctor to phone you......oh ok.

Date of birth - Which I had to repeat and she shouted back to me, in front of the waiting room. Yelled from her desk what shall I tell the doctor, oh it is personal.....yes...........well......ok I guess I can say that......Other receptionist.....he has got SO many phone to make.....Looks pointedly at me and at other woman.

Honestly felt awful. Not only was everything pretty much yelled but I was made to feel like I shouldn't be there!

So tomorrow I am going to register at the other doctors. I am so tired of not being to get a parking space, being spoken to like an idiot and having personal details yelled all over the show- don't get me wrong the doctors are in the main lovely but the admin.....awful.

beanielou

So did the Dr phone you back then?

Buffythedebtslayer

no, I cancelled the call back. I need to actually see the doctor.

I am on line registering as we speak for new doctor.

xx

Buffythedebtslayer

Online Registration Successful!

Thank God for that! I can drop the form in on the way out tomorrow and should be able to see someone soon after that.

juliejim

Hope you get better service at the other doctor's Buffy.

BTW I've just been emptying my subscriptions folder which I haven't used for a good while, it has 2 of your diaries in it of which the last one finished in 2013!

Jue

scaredy_cat

you should write a letter to the practice manager saying why you moved dr's and the bad attitude of the receptionist.