posting photos of children on FB

onomatopoeia99

Rebel_Cause wrote: »

I think your ex is worried about the fact that tis mutual friend can see the pics if he 'likes' or comments on the pic of the kids etc. Then it will show up on his news feed for all his 'friends' to see.

If A is friends with B and A posts a picture as "friends only", should B like or comment it will not show up to B's friends. I have tested this.

If B "shares" the photo it will, but if A is unhappy about it, they can unfriend B which will remove it again, or tell them not to. Also if B tags themselves or any of their friends in the photo, it will appear to those tagged (the person that posts the photo can review tags added before others before they go live, if they set the "Review tags people add to your own posts before the tags appear on Facebook?" to prevent this).

l3xi

onomatopoeia99 wrote: »

If A is friends with B and A posts a picture as "friends only", should B like or comment it will not show up to B's friends. I have tested this.

If B "shares" the photo it will, but if A is unhappy about it, they can unfriend B which will remove it again, or tell them not to. .

Actually I think this is not correct. My mother always complains that she can't directly share my photos to her own friends - actually she can click share, but what she is referring to is a message that appears to her when she tries to share my photos: "X chose a specific audience for this post. Only people in that audience will be able to see this when you share it.". So this actually means that, even if my mother shares my photo on her wall, only our common friends can see it, but not my mother's friends who are not my friends, if that makes sense. My photo is visible to the audience I selected, not the audience that my mother selected. And re photo tags, I have the settings so that any photo tags need to be approved by me.

These are all technicalities though... she could probably right click and download the photos and post them herself if she really wanted to. But that's valid for anyone who I send photos to via email. Once sent or posted, it can be published anywhere, we can't control everyone in our lives.

onomatopoeia99

If they have changed that to how you say, then it's a good thing IMO. I ended up with something of mine shared that I didn't want a few years back and tried to find a way to stop it - at the time, I got told "facebook is designed for sharing" so I unfriended the person which sorted it out.

rachy182

i wish some people would think twice about posting on facebook. The amount of people who announce theyre going on holiday leaving their house empty astounds me.

Ive got a cousin who im not close to but i am fb friends with. I havent seen her in years and only hear tid bits about her life eg she had a child. Without facebook i could only guess where about she lived within a 5 mile radius or what her kids were called. She post regularly on facebook not just about herself but her kids. Due to facebook i know exactly what her kids look like, what they've done this weekend,if one has been ill, where they go to school, names,which doctors they use, what road they live on and some activities are advertised in advance. For saying i havent spoken to her in 10 years+ i know so much about her family.

It may sound a bit paranoid assuming someone is scanning your fb to somehow harm you but i dont see why you should make it easy for them. Also its not just some pervert who wants to get closer to you kids you can get a lot of answers to security questions.

Philip624

Its not so much from the child saftey point of view that I wouldnt post photos but children today will grow up with a whole archive of photos/posts concerning them without having a say in the matter and the right to a private life when they turn 18, which is not something their parents had to consider when they were growing up.

Jagraf

Philip624 wrote: »

Its not so much from the child saftey point of view that I wouldnt post photos but children today will grow up with a whole archive of photos/posts concerning them without having a say in the matter and the right to a private life when they turn 18, which is not something their parents had to consider when they were growing up.

This is an absolutely brilliant post. This is why I never, ever post pictures of my child on facebook.

onomatopoeia99

Philip624 wrote: »

Its not so much from the child saftey point of view that I wouldnt post photos but children today will grow up with a whole archive of photos/posts concerning them without having a say in the matter and the right to a private life when they turn 18, which is not something their parents had to consider when they were growing up.

They never had a say before, either, the Internet has simply meant that it's easier to diseminate images and information to family and friends. It doesn't need facebook to do that either (and since children can't have facebook accounts, the infants can't be "tagged"). I didn't get any say about being in the local paper for something or other (I don't even remember what now) when I was six.

One would hope that any parent who's child objected would remove the childhood photos. Now maybe as a teenager they will think it's a great idea to get their mates to add their mum on facebook so they can trawl back a decade to look at old photos, but I suspect not. I'm sure mum won't want 14 year old Darren's mates as her facebook friends anyway, so they aren't going to be able to see any of them in any case.

GwylimT

I completely agree with your little ones dad. I woule never put a photo of my child on the internet and I wouldn't believe it was acceptable for anyone else to do so. If they want to forgo privacy that is a decision they can make when they're 18.

l3xi

Thanks everyone for the answers. It's been an interesting discussion.

I sent an email to my ex asking what is the issue around sharing the photos and indicating that I'm responsible in the way I share photos, it's a closed family-friends circle, and there's no identifiable info attached to the photos, not even first names actually. I actually sent him all the 14 photos of her I shared over the past 6 months, so that he can have an idea of what type of photos they are. (Also sent him the link to my child's school website, with a lot of children photos on it, including ours.)

My ex replied with another round of insults and also saying he actually doesn't give a F... so I guess that's where the 'communication' on this one ends.


PS. As for child consent, we don't ask our kids consent or opinion on a lot of stuff, from religion, to the school they attend, or food they eat. They are children, we make decisions for them and for ourselves. The photos can be deleted at any time and as long as they aren't public, I don't see what the harm is. That's my own subjective view obviously.

BigAunty

I can't believe you are still trying to justify and defend yourself to someone who is so selfish and abusive. Do as you please - he does.