Feel so alone

12_month_challenge

:hello:

Hi Pops

No hanging head in shame needed. I've been there done that also.

The main thing is you are back and going to pick up where you left off. You are going to get your mojo back

So you've had a hiccup its not the end of the world. You're not the first and certainly wont be the last.

I have to say I am rubbish at giving advice on peoples SOAs so I will leave that to the experts who will be along soon I'm sure.

As Martin Lewis says all levels of debt can be sorted. (something like that anyway)

Jump back on the debt busting wagon and lets get this debts a##e kicked once and for all.

We are still in a very similar amount of debt so we will join forces and plod along together. :A

f0xh0les

None of that head hanging nonsense around here Pops, you did a brave thing just now, you looked to see how bad it was. You didn't lie, you haven't taken to your bed and hid your head under the pillow. You are facing your debt.
It it there, it is a fact. You want to do something about it. You have spare funds after everything you need to pay for has been paid for, it will take a while but you will get there.
And you won't have to weave your own hemp knickers or live up a tree while doing it. Well, not unless you really fancy doing that.

KxMx

Two things jump out at me, £200 pm food & 70 pm presents.

I think both are too high and areas where you can save money.

You need to identify how and what you are spending £200pm on food. Are you meal planning? Making a shopping list after going through fridge/freezer/cupboards? Can you downgrade brands and do you really absolutely need everything you are buying?

£70pm on presents is £840 pounds per year.

Again, what are you buying for that money, for who, and do you really need to?

I do most of my present shopping during sales, with vouchers earned through surveys or cash back payouts.

I'm going to link to some advice I gave another poster a few days ago:

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showpost.php?p=70109079&postcount=391

The pages linked to are not only good for toys but presents too.

brizzledfw

Hi popstess!

Well done on posting the SOA :T. Am sure others will have more advice (see above too ) but I agree that presents (unless HM) have to take a backseat. Maybe not forever..but certainly for now. Keeping up with Joneseys? Or a release/f8ck it attitude when you feel low? Try and resist. You can't afford it.

Not sure about this, but is there a single person reduction you can get to your CT bill?

I am afraid I can't see where the paper 'excess' is going? Do you know? Certainly I have found that accounting for every penny makes you in control, whether for good or bad

suebgriseum

Hi Popstess.
You've made a massive step, and you can follow by tiny little steps and get there. Put a £1 in a jar and look at it - its a £1 saved!
Not sure how old your son is, children are very good at helping cut back, if they are old enough to understand put it to them straight, if they are a little young, saving at the shops can be 'game' you can work out the cheapest tin of beans etc ...., You have made a massive step well done.
You have shared , and we do not judge.
You need to do the awful boring in's and out's and post on here , lots of people have some good ideas on how to save money, so the £1 in the jar becomes £2 tomorrow, brilliant .

MrsShazbat

I don't have much to offer, but your APR on Very will be 39.9%. You might already have found it by now. Personally I'd make a small payment to keep the amount coming down so you haven't got that full BNPL balance to pay when it's due.

Well done on your progress so far and you've nothing to be ashamed of :T

Wimbrel

No shame! You should feel proud for facing up to your situation and taking the first step to getting debt free! You'll get there!

Popstess

Thank you everyone. Do you think £50 a week is a lot on shopping? Food and toiletries/ cleaning products? That was the budget in aiming for I spend way more when I'm not being good.
As for £70 on gifts. £50 a month goes into a savings account I can't touch for a year for Christmas this includes presents for my son bday as well as Xmas, everyone else and food etc so not much really if you think of it like that and I normally spend way over that but last Xmas I stuck to it for the first time.
The other £20 a month goes into a savings account for birthday presents for family and friends I also use this for Christenings weddings that kind of thing. I started saving the £20 a month because in the past I use to just go into my overdraft or use a credit card to pay for these things when they came up.

I will definitely will get back into meal planning and writing shopping lists and sticking to them to reduce my shopping bill.

kerri_gt

Pop over to the Old Style board for some advise / ideas on meal planning etc, they are a fan bunch and very creative.

Where do you usually shop and how? Frequently, big monthly shop, list etc? I used to do a big monthly shop but since our local lidl opened I tend to pop in more frequently for less (unless I'm.getting heavy items I stick to using a basket too so I'm limited in what I can buy), I have definitely noticed the average spend per week reduce by doing this (also because there are less of those items you pick up and never intended to buy to tempt you than a big Asda for instance). I still use the other big 4 and Iceland for certain items I can't get in lidl but it makes a big difference.

Meal planning, batch cooking, upping content of veg / lentils to meals and reducing the qty of meat can all help reduce the cost of meals. As OH is veggie I usually only buy meat on YS or an offer these days as I feel only I eat it and it's selfish buying it for me at full price. One other thing is how much food do you throw out? It's worth having a look at this and why, then either don't buy those items or reduce the way you buy. For example, there's two of us in this house, I used to buy lots of varieties of different fruits, some inevitably would go off and get binned so these days I just buy one or two of something, like a bag of apples and some grapes and no more until they are gone.

lessonlearned

Hi Popstess

Have been reading and lurking.....just wanted to say you are doing really well and wanted to wish you luck.

And.......you are not alone .........its just that a lot of people cant face the truth and are ostriches, so give yourself a big pat on the back.

You SOA looks pretty good - with over £400 a month wriggle room.

A couple of things......your leccy and Gas seem quite low, well done you, wish mine were

You have not allocated anything for hair cuts, entertainment etc. Also only £20 for clothes, is that really enough, I seem to recall children's shoes are not something you can easily economise on.

I think you could get your food bill down a bit though.

I would say that because you are in this for the long haul that ideally you need to build in some treats and a bit of pocket money. If you deprive you and your child of everything then you are more likely to fall off the wagon.

I also notice cable at £36. Can you reduce or cancel - summer is coming so maybe a bit less TV??

Re Holidays - can you manage something cheap and cheerful. When my kids were young we did the holiday vouchers from the "Sun" newspapers - we had some fab holidays for peanuts.

Same with entertainment - there's lots of free and low cost ideas.

If I was in your position i would try and Shave at least £50 off your food bill, Save £36 off cable and take the £21 surplus from your budget. This would then be Money for treats, entertainment, holidays. Etc

This would leave you £400 to throw at the debts.

Yes you need to reduce debts as quickly as you can but I think it's best to try and set a little aside for some fun times, especially when you have children.