Here we can all be heard for a little while. Part 2

charliewocka

Nervous about posting this but I'm going through a bad time at the moment and just need to get it off my chest....


[EMAIL="I@ve"]I've[/EMAIL] had anxiety for a while, previously had bouts of depression (fairly mild) and an eating disorder. When life isn't in 'control' I tend to feel bad and this is happening right now.


At the moment my mind is racing, I'm panicking, crying and just downright miserable, unable to see the light. [EMAIL="I@ve"]I've[/EMAIL] had some rough times over the years with feelings of rejection from my childhood, a few of my exes have died (I'm only in my early 30s so quite an event), I moved back to the UK, I'm a carer for my autistic brother, my current OH had a nasty accident last year and is still recovering, we've had crazy exes making life hell, bought a house, dog needed major surgery...quite a lot for me to deal with.


In January my mother informed me that her and dad were splitting up. Not too worried about that as it's way overdue -I could never see why they married anyways, but it's still sad. We're renovating the house and I haven't had a shower or sink in the house for weeks (coming to work early to shower) and everything is everywhere so I have no 'haven' at all and ALL of our free time is house related. The house is covered in dust and debris, we have no radiators in the living areas and it's just chaos. Then my cat had to have major surgery costing me another £700 this week and it has left me without a penny to my name. My OH wanted to go halves on the surgery but as she was my cat before we got together I am very stubborn and have refused (even though it's his cat now!).


I just have so much going on at the moment and I feel I need to vent. I try to raise issues with my partner but I don't think he realises how serious they are. I've registered with a GP because I think I need to talk to somebody (have a private GP as well but can't afford to pay and then claim from insurance) but I'm scared to go on medication. Sometimes I'm thinking 'why bother' but I know deep down that I have people who I need to care for.....but sometimes I just can't see myself getting out of this rut.


Sorry, rant over.

mellymoo74

Agency said presentation is good he also thinks the recommendation is my competition

Think it's a hangover from yesterday.

tea_lover

Charlie - that is a lot to deal with, no wonder you've reached the end of your tether. Just the mess at home would be enough to tip me over the edge. You're doing really well to still be going to work etc. Registering with a GP sounds like a very sensible move - have you managed to get an appointment? Hopefully they'll be able to help you with someone to speak to - and of course we are always here for a good old vent (does the world of good!)

We have an amazing duvet fort on this thread - feel free to cosy up in a comfy corner and have a little wallow x.

onomatopoeia99

Melly, good luck, you should definitely go for it.

Tea, you might wish to go back over this thread or its predecessor to when FOH was still living with you for a reminder of why you wanted him gone and why it would be a bad idea to get in contact again, even without all the stalking in recent months.

mellymoo74

What ono said tea.

Painting my nails dark grey

pollyanna_26

Great post ono .
Welcome to the thread charlie . Doctor should be your first port of call take care .
Good luck Melly x
polly

Georgiegirl256

tea_lover wrote: »

She's basically making out that I'm withholding his stuff and that's all he contacted my parents about. Only, he has never at any point mentioned any of his belongings - in his contact with my family he's given them gifts for me, asked if they'd speak to me and asked if they thought we'd get back together. If he was that desperate for something out of the house surely you'd just contact the police and ask for their advice? Especially as I've made it clear to the police all along that I want the stuff gone!
.

I knew that would happen! I've probably been watching too much Judge Rinder The sooner it's gone the better, then it's one less hold on you, and one less thing they can use against you.

I know you don't want to, but I'd be tempted to call up again and check that the call last night was logged.

Step away from the keyboard and phone, you do not need to talk to your FOH. Doing so would put he whole case in jeopardy, he'd think his campaign was worthwhile and that he's won you back, and it'll undermine how serious this all is.

Georgiegirl256

Good luck Melly x x

Welcome Charlie Such a lot for you to have gone through Vent away anytime you feel like it, there's nearly always someone here day and night x x

heartbreak_star

Melly - another one saying the questions were a checkbox exercise. I've had them once or twice, but it was always explained that it's a list of questions that have to be gone through and some will be the same question rephrased in a different way.

(Couldn't seem to explain that to my mum though...!)

Get thee to the interview! and best of luck.

WaS - another DLA nagger here mum's actually giving her car back as she hates driving and has put 1500 miles on her mobility car in 3 years. I can almost hear it snoring in her garage wish we could transfer it to you!

Tea - big hugs. Make sure idiot boy's stuff is packed - can you borrow a wheely bin or other waterproof container to put it in so it's out of your house?

HBS x

mellymoo74

Had to call them
Can't get off my estate big crash on m6 basically 4 hour delays am due in an hour if it screws it up it screws it up