Children pleading for expensive things

midnightraven3

I saw the programme, the handbag mothers oldest daughter (15 i think they said she was) was sneering all the time at the other mother when they were buying sunglasses, she ridiculed her and her ridiculous cackle was grinding my gears SO much:mad:

Nothing wrong in spending money of children who appreciate it, but when it turns them into sneering brats its time to take stock of your values

PasturesNew

I always wanted a swing. There were 2-3 of us, so it'd have got a lot of use. Garden was way large enough too (1/8th acre or so)....

Never got one though.

stamina9008

I HAD to wait 6 months just for a British bulldog wrestling figure, i have no sympathy with the brats of today or their parents.

nwc389

i still remember a few years ago when I worked at the bank a woman came in to increase her loan to buy Christmas presents , one of the things she was buying was a £300 necklace for her 10 year old daughter !! bad enough buying stuff like that for a child but having to go into debt for it !
My son was about the same age and all he wanted was a new football and football shirt !

elisebutt65

PasturesNew wrote: »

I always wanted a swing. There were 2-3 of us, so it'd have got a lot of use. Garden was way large enough too (1/8th acre or so)....

Never got one though.

We got a tyre tied up to a tree at the bottom of the garden. We also had an old orchard so I basically grew up sitting in trees with a book to escape the other brats (3 younger siblings)

My parents decided to live the 'Good life' so we never had very much unless it could be grown or made. Even our beds were made from pallets & out living room furniture was from scrapped Austins. All our clothes were run up in n my mum's Singer. This was only the '70s onwards as well.
My kids try it on a lot, even the eldest at 20, but there is a lot to say about the judicious use of the word 'no'.
I have a couple of Radleys, but they were from sales & outlet. My 'designer' sunnies are from holiday's in Greece & Spain usually costing around €5 a pair. Lol.
It's all about needs & wants, as I say to my kids; Do you just want it or do you really need it?' New school shoes versus branded trainers for example.

summerspring

FreddieFrugal wrote: »

Do you have any views on this?

Parents aren't spending as much time with their children now, due to both (if there are 2 of them..) going out to work. So, they have some extra cash, and they can afford the treats for the children. I think that's driving some of it. Mums are buying the kids expensive things to make them 'happy' but it's done out of guilt feelings because they're not able to be there for their children when they deep down know that they ought to be.


I never used to ask for treats or expensive things when I was a child because my parents never had the money for them (only my father went out to work, and he provided for all of us) and I never had that sense of entitlement.

haras_nosirrah

Something my dad did for me which has stood me in good stead budgeting wise was to give me £30 a month pocket money from 13 to 18 which was loads in late 90's/ early 00's but got no extras. If I want more I need to earn it so I got a paper round and a sat morning job. That money was to cover my clothes, going out, cinema etc and it meant that if I wanted or needed something I had to save for it. Money was paid into my bank account. Still got Xmas and birthday presents of course but had to buy my own 6th form school uniform

jrtfan

FBaby wrote: »

Why do some parents use their failing of not being able to say no to their kids as an excuse to spoil them rotten. If they can't say no to their kids then the problem is why them ans they should consider taking parenting classes. I Hebrew no problem saying no to my kids and they sure know it. I could afford to spoil them rotten but all that does is bring the worse in kids and I certainly don't want that for them. As a result not only do they not ask but I genuinely believe they don't crave luxury they are happy with what they have and so should they be.

Yes, for some reason it seems that the priority for many of today's parents is for their kids to like them, to be their friend.

Actually, I say "for some reason" but in fact I blame my own generation (the 1980s YUPPIES and DINKYS - not every single person, obviously, but the mindset was sufficiently widespread to have made a difference, I think). There was so much emphasis on material things and instant self-gratification back then. Many people put work and money before their kids, and over-compensated by showering them with the latest this or that. We learn our parenting skills from the way we were parented, so it was inevitable that many of today's parents are doing what they do. Sad.

BigAunty

I used to ask for expensive things as a kid from a low income family. I didn't really understand that my parents really didn't have that kind of money.

But by expensive things in the 70s/80s, I mean asking for toys with batteries in (batteries were seen as v. expensive), asking for clothes and shoes that didn't come from the market, Asda or Woolworth and asking to go on school trips longer than a day (all usually rebuffed).

So I do think that kids from lower income families, even if the parents repeatedly decline the pestering, will still continue to ask and won't necessarily have that much insight into how pointless 'stuff is' and how the parents can't afford even a tiny amount of the demands made, understand the benefits of saving.

System

When my eldest 3 kids wanted expensive things they had to wait for birthdays or Christmas. If they didnt want to wait, they always had the option of getting a part time job which they did.

The youngest two couldnt be bothered to get off their bums so realistically, they didnt have the quantity of expensive items that the older three had.... Their choice.