How to split our mortgage payments fairly

class2ldn

But our personal loans etc are not taken into account. Surely it's fair to contribute equal amounts when paying for joint bills etc. I put in that money and then decide what I can afford after. She tends to do it the other way round and will contribute after her personal outgoings have gone.
I've no issues paying more money but what's the point of her being on the mortgage if I'm effectively paying 100% of it. She may be paying the bills but the house won't get repossessed if she doesn't will it?? Unlike the mortgage.
I can afford to pay 1200 and still have all my bills etc. If she can't afford to save the same % as me then surely she should be looking at cutting down her personal spending?

class2ldn

duchy wrote: »

So because she hasn't run up debt (2 car loans, creditcard debt) which you are classing as part of your contribution you want her to contribute more ?

Seriously ?

If it was the other way around and she had creditcard debt -would you be prepared to increase your contribution to the joint pot or would you think "Her debt -it can come out of her fun money" ?

If you recalculated your figures so your car loan and creditcard payments were taken from the pot at the same level as hers and you made the shortfall up out of your own fun money- what does that do to the numbers ?

Essentially are you expecting her to pay for your choices not to clear your creditcard each month and to have a boy car rather than a man car ? If she was on the same wage as you that perhaps wouldn't be unreasonable but she isn't.

If I were her I'd be wondering just how difficult your attitude to money could make things if you have children and she wasn't earning or was earning even less working part-time raising your children. I'd probably run a mile !

She's not funding my loans as they are nothing to do with her, I pay them each month yet I still save 46% of my wages.
After her car loans etc have come out she's only saving 39% of it.
I'm not a selfish person but I don't splash my cash on myself as it goes into the savings.
Anything left over is mine to spend. Now if her bills drain most of her cash then she needs to cut back as obviously the % of her wages being spent on Personal bills is too high.
If we had kids then it's different.
If she had to give up work do you seriously expect me to insist on her still paying in that amount.
Get real.
I just want her to prioritise the savings over her personal spending. I do so why can't she?
If we want to go out il pay for it or I'd give her the money if she couldn't afford it but I don't have money left over to spend on cinemas etc as it goes in the savings and if I didn't have my bills I'd put in even more. Surely that should be her priority, anything else she can spend on is a bonus.

class2ldn

I guess on the flip side I'm effectively expecting her to raise her saving amount based on what I can afford. If i could save 60% it doesn't mean she could so I suppose in that sense it is a little unfair.

gazter

I dont think you are too far from reaching an amicable agreement. It is great that you have discussed it with her and she is keen to get it sorted.

Remember, this is a partnership! There is no yours and hers! When you are calculating salaries and everything, use figures after tax (ie. what actually goes into your account, not the topline on your payslip).

Put both of your salaries into the joint account, or put the difference in after an agreed monthly amount each. eg. £500 or £800 as your non household spending.

Because you earn more, and you have substantial pre existing commitments, i think a *temporary* accommodation can be made until these are sorted out.

She seems very receptive, just chat. i would work on the principle that each of you can achieve the same standard of living with what is left after you have contributed to the same pot.

I wouldnt overfuss about percentages. Thats just resentment. How you going to feel when she gets knocked up and has to give up work or go part time to look after the kids?

class2ldn

Well im not trying to be unfair, I'm honestly quite easy going and my only real passion that I spend money on is cars.
I've been quite happy paying more but while are saving I'd like her to knuckle down a bit more. If she has to sacrifice going out then so be it. I do, If i spend money on anything then it's after I've put the savings money away.
We are going to sit down later and discuss our outgoings. We'll sort it out I'm sure.

Pixie5740

Given the current levels of debt you have I don't think you should be trying to buy a place yet full stop. I think your savings should be going towards getting everything paid off before you start saving for a deposit.

I don't know if you've ever been a home owner before but there's more to it than just the mortgage payments. You need a good slush fund behind you for all those unexpected repairs and routine maintenance. For example, I just moved into s flat and it wasn't until I got the keys that I realised the front door isn't a real front door, it's an interior door that's being used as a front door. That was just the tip of the iceberg.

class2ldn

Well quite a few of my debts will be paid off soon, also just received a payrise this month so my pay this month will be well over 3k take home. That will enable me to pay off a fair bit plus I've worked 4 days overtime. Financially I'm pretty stable, I may have loans etc but they are all affordable.

gazter

class2ldn wrote: »

Well quite a few of my debts will be paid off soon, also just received a payrise this month so my pay this month will be well over 3k take home. That will enable me to pay off a fair bit plus I've worked 4 days overtime. Financially I'm pretty stable, I may have loans etc but they are all affordable.

Remember those car loans will *massively* eat into what a bank will allow you to borrow for a mortgage, they add up all your outgoings and net it off your total. If you are pulling in £50k, just get them sorted and pay them off early.

class2ldn

Well when we went to a broker we were offered nearly 300k. Unfortunately our deposit is only around 12500 so would have to look at a max property value of around 250-260k.
Our problem is that where we live the prices are shooting up at an alarming rate. Even if we pay off our debts and save it won't match the speed at which the housing is going up and in a years time will probably be worse off.

gazter

class2ldn wrote: »

Well when we went to a broker we were offered nearly 300k. Unfortunately our deposit is only around 12500 so would have to look at a max property value of around 250-260k.
Our problem is that where we live the prices are shooting up at an alarming rate. Even if we pay off our debts and save it won't match the speed at which the housing is going up and in a years time will probably be worse off.

Did he do a proper check of all your outgoings? If not he was just giving you a ball park figure based around multiples. It might be when you actually dig deeper and put in an application you find that it drops considerably.