How to split our mortgage payments fairly

AlexMac

Assuming you're still bothering to read all this (since after posting on and off for an hour around noon today you seem to have nodded off...?) why don't you get your loved one to read this thread so she can become aware of your darkest fears? After all, you might as well stress-test the relationship now rather than after the wedding?

And if she's still with you in the morning, after telling you what she thinks, your second choice is obviously a good 'un!

swindiff

There is one simple rule in this situation. What's her's is her's and what's yours is her's lol

wastedtalent

Me and my partner worked it out so after we've both contributed we have an equal amount of spare cash left to save, shop, spend, do what we like with.

I earn more, I pay more, but in the same way, one of us gets a pay rise we both benefit.

jjj1980

I agree the split should be based on percentages of income, with both keeping their own separate accounts and paying in money to a third account for bills. The only issue then, and one I faced with my ex, is when one partner either "forgets" to pay their share in or decides to spend it all on other things. Leaving one person to shoulder all the bills themselves!! Not a good situation and causes huge resentment. I could never have had a joint account with him as he would have eaten in my salary after using his own and no bills would have been paid!

HappyMJ

jjj1980 wrote: »

I agree the split should be based on percentages of income, with both keeping their own separate accounts and paying in money to a third account for bills. The only issue then, and one I faced with my ex, is when one partner either "forgets" to pay their share in or decides to spend it all on other things. Leaving one person to shoulder all the bills themselves!! Not a good situation and causes huge resentment. I could never have had a joint account with him as he would have eaten in my salary after using his own and no bills would have been paid!

Did your spendthrift ex ask to borrow money from you in the 4th week of the month. That really annoyed me. them: I'm skint can I borrow a tenner. me: what for. them: i need to see (insert name here) and i need some money for taxi. me: wait till you get paid. them: oh you're so controlling. me: I'm not arguing with you and I'm not a bank I'm going out...bye.

AdrianC

<shudder> Train wreck ahead!

You (as a couple) have a whole bunch of petty needle-points about basic daily finances, yet you're looking to take on a large and long-term financial commitment - and you're already trying to turn that into a needle, too?

class2ldn

Sorry for the lack of replies.
I have discussed it with her and I told her I was worried that I'm putting more effort into this then she is.
She's quite understanding and wants to find a way we can both equally pay in without struggling each month.
Obviously il be paying more of the mortgage but if I paid the mortgage and she paid the bills it would work out like I said before about 1700 a month. If you consider my wages are around 2500 a month and hers about 1200 it leaves me with 12-1300 and her with 800 for spending,covering personal loans etc.
In regards to the car loan that's 261 it was a personal loan I had on a car which I sold but the term was over 5 years.
I then bought a bmw 330i this year on pcp which is why my insurance is high even though I'm 32 and 11 years ncb and an advanced driver. Also has tinted windows which although done by bmw was classed as a modification so thats bumped it up. Will come down in November.
I think in reality I'm maybe resenting what she has left over as she doesn't have the outgoings I do on loans and credit cards etc which is down to me as there my issues and not hers.
This is why I feel like I'm putting more into it when really we are probably paying a fair amount according to our wages.
With the difference in wages theres going to be a bigger gap then normal.
I guess most of what I have left over gets spent on paying off my personal debts and thats not her fault. She's got 1 car loan I've got 2, she's got a cheaper phone then me, she has 1 credit card which she pays off every month, I have 2500 on mine so guess it's my own fault I'm skint each month lol.
What would be the right amount we should be paying each then according to our wages?
Me 2500
Her 1200

class2ldn

Right so I've worked out that I'm contributing 48% of my salary each month, she's only contributing 39 so if we paid equal % amounts it would be 575 for her each month. Basically an extra 100 pm.
Do you think it's fair to ask for this extra contribution?
That way we are both putting in the same % of our wages?

class2ldn

To cover the combined costs of 1700 I've worked out that we need to pay 46% of our salaries.
For me that's 1150 and for her 550.
Obviously anything extra can go in as a bonus to save for our holidays, house decorating etc so I'd be happy putting in 1200 still. Up until last month she was onky putting in 400 so upped it to 475 as I wanted to clear 500 saving each month.
What do you think of the percentage?
At least that way the bills and mortgage etc are covered and anything extra going in from us is a bonus.
I tend to pay most of our holidays anyway.

duchy

class2ldn wrote: »

Right so I've worked out that I'm contributing 48% of my salary each month, she's only contributing 39 so if we paid equal % amounts it would be 575 for her each month. Basically an extra 100 pm.
Do you think it's fair to ask for this extra contribution?
That way we are both putting in the same % of our wages?

So because she hasn't run up debt (2 car loans, creditcard debt) which you are classing as part of your contribution you want her to contribute more ?

Seriously ?

If it was the other way around and she had creditcard debt -would you be prepared to increase your contribution to the joint pot or would you think "Her debt -it can come out of her fun money" ?

If you recalculated your figures so your car loan and creditcard payments were taken from the pot at the same level as hers and you made the shortfall up out of your own fun money- what does that do to the numbers ?

Essentially are you expecting her to pay for your choices not to clear your creditcard each month and to have a boy car rather than a man car ? If she was on the same wage as you that perhaps wouldn't be unreasonable but she isn't.

If I were her I'd be wondering just how difficult your attitude to money could make things if you have children and she wasn't earning or was earning even less working part-time raising your children. I'd probably run a mile !