Am I bad person for wanting to cut my Mum out of my life?

princealber71

Hi i also would like some advice on disowning my mother the problem I have is that social services are involved and are telling me I have a duty of care but I want nothing more to do with the woman would I be able to send the social worker an email telling them that I want nothing more to do with my mum and to leave me alone and not contact me again would social services be able to take some sort of legal action against me if I did this I'm sick and tired of the constant phone calls regarding my mum I've got my own life to lead it's affecting my work and my relationship with my girlfriend and is making me ill

ognum

princealber71 wrote: »

Hi i also would like some advice on disowning my mother the problem I have is that social services are involved and are telling me I have a duty of care but I want nothing more to do with the woman would I be able to send the social worker an email telling them that I want nothing more to do with my mum and to leave me alone and not contact me again would social services be able to take some sort of legal action against me if I did this I'm sick and tired of the constant phone calls regarding my mum I've got my own life to lead it's affecting my work and my relationship with my girlfriend and is making me ill

I think it would be a good idea for you to stay a new message, that way you can get answers specific to you.

ShatelBurkinson

If they are toxic to you and your other relationships, you should do what is best for you as a mother.

Ilona

princealber71 wrote: »

Hi i also would like some advice on disowning my mother the problem I have is that social services are involved and are telling me I have a duty of care but I want nothing more to do with the woman would I be able to send the social worker an email telling them that I want nothing more to do with my mum and to leave me alone and not contact me again would social services be able to take some sort of legal action against me if I did this I'm sick and tired of the constant phone calls regarding my mum I've got my own life to lead it's affecting my work and my relationship with my girlfriend and is making me ill

Hi. It would be best if you started a new thread, you have dug up an old one and the answers given are specific to the original poster. Start a new thread and people will be able to advise you.

Ilona

Pollycat

Prrincealber71
I agree about starting a new thread.
The problem with tacking your own, new situation on the bottom​of an existing thread is that a lot of posters read the first post and reply to that and that won't help you.

If you look at the Marriages & Relationships board, there's a blue button on the left-hand side that says 'New Thread'.
Click on that & repost your message.

no1catman

asajj wrote: »

Not my parents but my older brother. Not regretted ever since.

I can raised that - estranged from both my older brother and sister. Always used to look up to him, but I think he was taken over by some doppelganger - with his actions not what I would expect.
The less said about my sister (cruella de ville) the better.

Only miss any general family news, and my sister-in-law!

springdreams

princealber71, some full stops and other punctuation would also make your post more readable ...

System

I cut my biological dad out of my life about 11 years ago, haven;'t seen or spoken to him in that time. Tbh its not been easy. My paternal nan died and i didn't go to the funeral as i couldn't face seeing him or any of the family, also meant my family went from being quite large to just being 6 of us.

My problem is 2 things, one i want him to admit and aplogse for being a bad dad and not being there when i needed him (never going to happen he thinks he;s dad of the year) and two be a better person (he's always going to be the same and i have to accept that if i were to have any relationship with him)

In the end it was stressingme out so much that cutting him off seemed the easiest thing to do. And whilst it has got rid of a lot of the stress i now have new problems such as how am i going to feel if he dies? Will i be at peace with my choice or regret it later on? My mum has always told me its my choice but even she worries i may regret it. But this is my choice and i will live with it.

faerielight

it's a huge decision that only you can make, and everybody's situation is different. You are not a bad person either way. I cut contact with my abusive mother most of my adult life, but I felt the pain every day, and was haunted by all the things I needed to say to her ,and hoping she would change, but she didn't. She died 2 weeks ago without making amends, I never got the apology I so desperately needed and it's devastating, now she's gone. You could always stop phone contact and visits and communicate via email, that way you get to put distance . Best of luck, whatever you choose.

Sicard

How To Divorce Your Parents:



http://thelawdictionary.org/article/how-to-divorce-your-parents/