is my husband hiding money?

balletshoes

gettingtheresometime wrote: »

Time I think for a frank look at your finances together

this i agree with - you've had a change to the household income (your part time wage and a reduction in tax credits) so now's the time to re-consider all your household (and personal) bills/financial commitments, based on whats coming in, and then look again at whats the best way to pay each one from which source of income.

Gavin83

I rarely see a topic with so many assumptions and an anti man attitude! Quite how you lot come to the conclusions you do from little info we have is beyond me. We've no actual information beyond his (I assume monthly) salary. We haven't even been told what his expenses are. For all we know his salary just covers all the bills and he is left with £0 a month for personal expenses and therefore she is much better off.

To the OP, what are the outgoings he spends per month?

BigAunty

Gavin83 wrote: »

I rarely see a topic with so many assumptions and an anti man attitude!

To be fair, even without exact figures on income/outgoings, people are picking up on the fact that their partnership isn't working because he refuses to share quite basic household information with his partner.

Their financial circumstances have changed - he has confirmed he is earning more - and it's her that has to bear the reduction in benefits. As far as he is concerned, it's not their situation that has changed but hers and she has to lump it.

If you read the benefit thread, you will see that the OP believes that if she challenged him by saying that she would no longer pay the rent with the CTC, she thinks he'd refuse to pay a penny more and would rather get into rent arrears and be evicted.

So there are communication issues at the very least.

Guest101

BigAunty wrote: »

To be fair, even without exact figures on income/outgoings, people are picking up on the fact that their partnership isn't working because he refuses to share quite basic household information with his partner.

Their financial circumstances have changed - he has confirmed he is earning more - and it's her that has to bear the reduction in benefits. As far as he is concerned, it's not their situation that has changed but hers and she has to lump it.

If you read the benefit thread, you will see that the OP believes that if she challenged him by saying that she would no longer pay the rent with the CTC, she thinks he'd refuse to pay a penny more and would rather get into rent arrears and be evicted.

So there are communication issues at the very least.

To be fair...!

1: he could equally be protecting his wife from the realities of their finances.
2: she could be getting less as she's now working a tax credits have caught up post April.
3: communication is 2 way. We don't know what her method of communicating is
4: his extra money amounts to a whole £8 a week. Hardly planning to do a runner is he?!?!

Gloomendoom

Guest101 wrote: »

3: communication is 2 way. We don't know what her method of communicating is

Email??????????

mumof4littleguys wrote: »

I emailed him today and he said this year he had a raise of £450.

enthusiasticsaver

Surely rent is one of the biggest bills if not the biggest so if you are paying this and he is just paying for utilities on a full time wage it sounds like he is getting off easy. Why can you not both sit down and both declare income and add child tax credits (what about child benefit?) and then work out outgoings and split the difference so you both have the same amount of personal expenditure? Do you have a problem with communicating with each other?

pickledonionspaceraider

mumof4littleguys wrote: »

Ive been advised from the tax credit forum to come here for help and advice.
Ill try to keep it short.
My husband works full time and we were claiming ctc. He paid the majority of the bills from his wages and I would pay the rent, school dinner moneys and packed lunch from the child tax ccredentials. Ot would leave me £10 per week to live on which was just awful.
So last year I decided to get a part time job. I earn roughly £94 per week.
I knew our tax credits would reduce a bit this year with the extra income but yesterday when I went to pay my rent this week there was only £100 in my account from child tax credits. I was shocked and called the helpline to be told there was no mistake. That meant they reduced it by £80. This means my £94 wages will onlu leave me with £14 after paying my usual bills.
Checked my husband wage slip from last year and it says he was on just over £1300.
The guys on the tax credit forum made me think he must have had a raise.
I emailed him today and he said this year he had a raise of £450.
He does pay most of the bills. All I pay is rent and school meals. But I am now going to have to live on £14 a month and my husband wont help. He says he doesn't have a lot of money either.
I just feel like life surely cant be this bad? I don't know what im going to do.

I don't think you are hard done to at all!

You only earn £94 a week from a part time job, and seem to have a pretty cushy lifestyle - funded in large by your husband and topped up by benefits.

You get 15% of your wages as money for ''yourself'' - does your husband get 15% of his wages to himself?

BigAunty

Guest101 wrote: »

4: his extra money amounts to a whole £8 a week. Hardly planning to do a runner is he?!?!

Those with good knowledge of the benefits system on the benefits board have raised doubts that her CTC would have been slashed that severely with the pay rise that he said he received.

In other words, they wonder if he's lying, though an overpayment of CTC in the past would reduce the sum due by a larger degree so that might be the case. That innocent scenario has been flagged, too.

She has been shut out of quite basic shared housekeeping duties - she has no idea what her partner earns, nor what he spends on bills. Unless she indicates differently, it looks like she gets no access to bills or bank statements which is fairly unusual in this day and age of shared accounts and financial transparency. The CTC would have been a joint application and yet still she has been kept in the dark.

And she is adamant that her partner would rather see the children homeless than pay more towards the rent - that's bloody scary.

So it's not just purely about whether or not he is retaining an unequal share of household income at her expense, but that he dominates her at the household level and would rather inflict misery on his family than increase his share of contributions.

BigAunty

pickledonionspaceraider wrote: »

You get 15% of your wages as money for ''yourself'' - does your husband get 15% of his wages to himself?

Do we think he gives himself an allowance for treats capped at £2 a day or do we think he may its his right to lord it over his missus and kids?

Guest101

BigAunty wrote: »

Do we think he gives himself an allowance for treats capped at £2 a day or do we think he may its his right to lord it over his missus and kids?

Presumptuous. No evidence for this.