OH hates my new accent...

Lily-Rose_3

I agree with purpleshoes.

And people are responding, based on what you posted in your first post.

I don't know what you expected people to say, or how you expected people to react. From the content of your first post, your wife sounds extremely rude and prejudiced and like a snob. And I don't buy it that any condition is anything to do with it.

You don't like the answers people have given.

There isn't anything anyone else can say really.

duchy

downhillfast wrote: »

Already covered and explained - yawn... there are a lot of people on here with a hair trigger...

I suspect you are rather taken aback by the fact people think this is a maybe more serious problem than you thought.

My partner's accent is pure sarf London and grates on me at times - but I wouldn't try to humiliate him in public over it- I do wonder if she's a bit of a snob or upwardly mobile .....other issues aside.

downhillfast

purpleshoes wrote: »

No it hasn't. People are just trying to find out why she's so reluctant to seek help.

Which I have already tried to explain at least twice...

There is still something in the back of her mind that thinks it's not as much of a problem as she thinks...

She has also had a terrible pregnancy regarding sickness throughout so hasn't been in any 'place' to consider sorting this out as she has been concentrating on the pregnancy. She has managed to control most aspects of this condition reasonably well for a number of years so thinks a little more time won't hurt.

I think I actually started this thread to get opinions on transient accents more than anything but I don't even know now...

missbiggles1

downhillfast wrote: »

I think I need to TOTALLY CLARIFY something...

My wife is NOT VIOLENT

Does NOT have a split personality disorder

Does not go out of her way to upset people (me included!) on a daily basis.

99% of people that she deals with regularly (friends and colleagues) wouldn't even know she had a problem.

She does know she has a problem and tries to deal with it as best she can until she is ready to do something officially... which will be very soon hopefully.

Our relationship is very strong and I am not a victim of any kind of domestic abuse be it physical or verbal.


This thread has turned into a character assasination of my wife based on the SYMPTOMS of a condition that makes HER life awful is some respects.

I don't know why I even started this thread to be honest...

If my partner interrupted me to say that my accent sounded like a farmer and thick, I'd think that a case of verbal abuse. Even if this is what she thinks (and that is bad enough), why does she have to voice this opinion to you so hurtfully?

Lily-Rose_3

missbiggles1 wrote: »

If my partner interrupted me to say that my accent sounded like a farmer and thick, I'd think that a case of verbal abuse. Even if this is what she thinks (and that is bad enough), why does she have to voice this opinion to you so hurtfully?

Exactly. I think it's a bit worrying actually, that the OP seems to be making one excuse after another for his wife's behaviour. I certainly wouldn't be tolerating it, and would not expect my husband to tolerate it if it were me attacking him.

missbiggles1

Lily-Rose wrote: »

Exactly. I think it's a bit worrying actually, that the OP seems to be making one excuse after another for his wife's behaviour. I certainly wouldn't be tolerating it, and would not expect my husband to tolerate it if it were me attacking him.

I believe that the OP is female. (Not that it matters.)

Georgiegirl256

downhillfast wrote: »

There are some very specific issues that OH has 100% and no issues mentioned that she doesn't exhibit... My very amateur understanding (correct me if I'm wrong) is that there isn't a blood/urine/toenail clipping test that will categorically tell us a diagnosis and any doctor (at GP level at least) will base any diagnosois, with a view to making a referral, on the sysmptoms we tell them ie the symtoms of misophonia.

If you lived in my house you would know for sure believe me!

That's the thing that you're just not getting....you can not be 100% sure though. I bet doctors absolutely hate people who self diagnose.

As FBaby points out, with the condition yes, you are extremely sensitive to various noises and things, but why turn round and call you thick? That's just downright rude and total snobbery.

Yes, your wife very well may have this condition, but why the need to be rude? Why make your and other people's lives hard too? She needs to be accountable for her own actions, and the sooner she realises that the better.

downhillfast

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

That's the thing that you're just not getting....you can not be 100% sure though. I bet doctors absolutely hate people who self diagnose.

I'm sure they do in a lot of cases. And in other cases they probably appreciate a little background research to help them pinpoint lesser known conditions. As was pointed out earlier many doctors probably wouldn't even know this condition exists.

Mojisola

downhillfast wrote: »

99% of people that she deals with regularly (friends and colleagues) wouldn't even know she had a problem.

She does know she has a problem and tries to deal with it as best she can until she is ready to do something officially... which will be very soon hopefully.

Our relationship is very strong and I am not a victim of any kind of domestic abuse be it physical or verbal.

It's difficult when someone starts a thread to raise one issue - we only get told some of the problems whereas the OP knows the person in her/his entirety and knows all their partner's good points as well as the problems.

I would just say that if she has had OCD-type problems for years and hasn't looked for help, it's time to face up to the issues and deal with them.

Lots of us on here have health problems and we do understand how difficult it can be to start to examine the problems and find ways to reduce their impact on our lives and those around us but staying stuck as you are, especially if symptoms are getting worse, just isn't an option.

Becoming a parent has to change the focus of your life from yourself to what is best for the new person you are now responsible for.

misty_blue_2

My husband has a broad Yorkshire accent and I would never dream of insulting him about it.
I myself was brought up in Staffordshire surrounded by farming land and I must add had an uncle and granny that lived and worked the land

I too have a different accent from my hubby

I find it so sad that your partner cannot accept your accent as being part of you

As for the comment she made on farmers I really think she needs to look at her own behaviour and get help quick

With a child due it is not easy and when they are born its harder still
If she is finding fault now goodness knows what it will be like for you with the pressure o f a new born, no sleep.
If you think her hormones are affecting her now wait until the birth