Divorcing the debt and the fella.

NotNormal

I'm considering removing my Oct 2016 challenges. I still plan to shift the weight and the debt, but I feel like I made the decision based on Him. I don't want that, I want it to be about me. I'd rather take longer to pay off the debt and know I did it for me than push myself to do it sooner and feel like I had fallen into the trap of my life being about him still.

So instead I'm going to do similar to marsbar - pay towards all debts but focus on one at a time to make extra payments etc. Currently I am only paying off a few of my debts as the others do not seem to want to respond to emails. So I think what I'll do is focus on getting rid of the debt I'm currently making overpayments on (second lowest debt, but lowest that I'm currently paying) and then I will contact all companies that haven't responded again. And this new decision means I'm finally ready to be honest. I'm going to do something I've been putting off. I'm going to post a list of my debts.

-Deep breath-

Personal
#1 £1,255 (Now £1,235) 1.6% paid
#2 £590 (Now £585) 0.8% paid
#3 £120 (Now £115) 4% paid

Total - £1965 (Now £1935)

Utilities
#4 £260
#5 £135
#6 £125
#7 £80
#8 £65 (Now £39.08) 39.9% paid
#9 £50

Total £715 (Now £689.08)

My goal is to clear #8 first, then contact the companies that haven't responded.

June Goals
Hit 65% paid on debt #8 (minimum payments will take me to 56%)
Hit 2.5% paid on debt #1 (minimum payments will take me to 2.4% which will bug me lol)
Minimum payments on debt #2 and #3
Eat less, exercise more!
Complete Christmas gift list
Declutter one item a day

Now I have until August to get this place rearranged, organised etc ready for a friend visiting - I'm not talking about painting etc. But finding everything a home and being a functional room. I have 4 rooms and a hallway.

So June - Bedroom and Bathroom.
July - Kitchen and Living Room.
August - Hallway (the hallway shouldn't take very long to do at all, it's mostly the cats stuff out there along with a couple of bits of furniture that are waiting to be moved into the correct places!)

Oops, this just became an essay! I better end it there, I still need to go hoover!

themarsbargirl

Good on ya hun. I weighed myself this morning :eek:

NotNormal

themarsbargirl wrote: »

Good on ya hun. I weighed myself this morning :eek:

I'm still hiding from my scales... I've decided instead of stressing myself out I'm going to wait until the last of the wii stuff arrives next week. Then I will get the wii set up and then I can weigh myself. No point stressing myself out for the next few days while there isn't much I can do about it.

Got my spreadsheet updated to include percentage paid.
My budget for June is set up - including what comes out of what pay day. And I'm currently setting up a spreadsheet and budget for the redecoration. I'm going to take it one room at a time. First one being bathroom as that is a need rather than a want (for example I don't have a bath mat in there which is pretty dangerous with my health issues) which I have set a £50 budget for. I'm obviously going to be very MSE and shop around for deals to make the most of my money.

How are things going with you? Any news from the crisis team yet?

themarsbargirl

They visited, upset me (still upset now and will be for several days/weeks), told me that I was 'low risk' (!!!!!!?????? without actually assessing my risk levels) and that they would put me on a waiting list, but only for a local bed and not a private one because it is 'just for medication'.
So basically, they are never going to find a bed for me because they will always consider someone else more important than me.

They were really aggressive and bullying towards me too.

NotNormal

themarsbargirl wrote: »

They visited, upset me (still upset now and will be for several days/weeks), told me that I was 'low risk' (!!!!!!?????? without actually assessing my risk levels) and that they would put me on a waiting list, but only for a local bed and not a private one because it is 'just for medication'.
So basically, they are never going to find a bed for me because they will always consider someone else more important than me.

They were really aggressive and bullying towards me too.

That's terrible! I always have someone with me for these appointments as I find they are less bullying when there is a witness. Can you put in a complaint?

I had someone tell me I was low risk before, I got absolutely no help. Until I walked in and told the receptionist I needed to see someone because I wanted to kill myself and they finally realised I may be "low risk" but not for long xx

themarsbargirl

My Dad was there, and my Mum was in the kitchen and could hear everything. We are contemplating putting in a complaint and copying in the local MP, but it all comes down to energy and how distressing I find it. Which is the sh1tty thing, when you are unwell enough to need the crisis team you are too unwell to be able to complain about poor treatment.

Dad did write to the manager of crisis team saying we want it in writing that I am on a waiting list for a bed and one will be available in the next few weeks.

I'm going to cry on my student nurse this week when I see her.

The thing is, they didn't ask me about my feelings and if I was suicidal at all....so how the heck did they assess me?

They just spent the whole meeting trying to bully me into starting medication at home with them coming to visit me every day....which I ahd already said no to before they even arrived (after what they did last year when we tried that) and my psych had said no intervention, just a bed.

They tell me that they are good and help a lot of people.....I don't know anyone locally that has a single good thing to say about them.

NotNormal

themarsbargirl wrote: »

My Dad was there, and my Mum was in the kitchen and could hear everything. We are contemplating putting in a complaint and copying in the local MP, but it all comes down to energy and how distressing I find it. Which is the sh1tty thing, when you are unwell enough to need the crisis team you are too unwell to be able to complain about poor treatment.

Dad did write to the manager of crisis team saying we want it in writing that I am on a waiting list for a bed and one will be available in the next few weeks.

I'm going to cry on my student nurse this week when I see her.

The thing is, they didn't ask me about my feelings and if I was suicidal at all....so how the heck did they assess me?

They just spent the whole meeting trying to bully me into starting medication at home with them coming to visit me every day....which I ahd already said no to before they even arrived (after what they did last year when we tried that) and my psych had said no intervention, just a bed.

They tell me that they are good and help a lot of people.....I don't know anyone locally that has a single good thing to say about them.

Get your Dad to include that in what he says to them. They didn't listen to what was told, didn't discuss what they were there to discuss and didn't assess you as they didn't let you talk about what was happening and how you felt so you were unable to notify them of how you're doing... xxx

themarsbargirl

He already sent the letter hun....

NotNormal

themarsbargirl wrote: »

He already sent the letter hun....

I know I meant when he speaks to them, like when they respond to the letter/take it above their heads. As obviously saying to them "you did nothing" won't do much, but telling their bosses might. If that makes sense?

themarsbargirl

Yeah, it makes sense. It's just unfortunate that mental health services aren't more joined up and when they made the big shift from hospital care to community care they forgot to account for the fact that often short term hospital care is appropriate for people, especially when starting meds and acutely unwell, so they got rid of all the beds without putting in adequate community care toreplace it iyswim.

How's your day been anyways?