New relationship advice needed.

FredG

pineapple wrote: »

:eek::eek::eek:

Yep. I was mortified. Definitely gave me a bit of a cold chill and made me pleased I didn't have a bunny rabbit.

I know some people are "needier" than others, I am perfectly happy to be in absolute solitude for weeks on end for example and a lot of people find that weird but I think there are lines and acceptable boundaries for behaviour.

FredG

Yolina wrote: »

:rotfl: Give her number to Pinapple's guy... perfect match

In Pineapple's situation I'd be laying some clear boundaries. If someone can't respect your individual space it's never going to work out.

I used to fall in to a trap of being excessively accommodating and overly nice and in the end it lead me in to situations far worse than the one I mentioned. I've long learned my lesson.

pineapple

FredG wrote: »

I am perfectly happy to be in absolute solitude for weeks on end for example and a lot of people find that weird but I think there are lines and acceptable boundaries for behaviour.

That's me too. Re relationships I'm possibly a lost cause anyway these days. On my way to becoming a mad old dear with cats - except I don't like cats .:huh:

pineapple

Yolina wrote: »

:rotfl: Give her number to Pinapple's guy... perfect match

My goodness I think he would have more than met his match.

FredG

pineapple wrote: »

That's me too. Re relationships I'm possibly a lost cause anyway these days. On my way to becoming a mad old dear with cats - except I don't like cats .:huh:

Don't think there's anything wrong with enjoying your own company. I like it, I don't get the mundane interruptions of society and the expectation to keep up appearances.

I don't think an overly needy person can ever have a successful relationship with someone who has that loner streak. I think society has pushed us all in to thinking that we're worthless unless we have a partner, 800 Facebook friends and a social calendar you just HAVE to tell everyone about but to me that's all white noise. Being happy is all that's important. Alone or with someone.

pineapple

FredG wrote: »

In Pineapple's situation I'd be laying some clear boundaries. If someone can't respect your individual space it's never going to work out.

I had it all planned for today. After not responding to the texts last night I sent a 'good morning' text late morning. Was going to follow it up with a suggestion to meet. But unusually no reply, nights, nada.
Maybe he is sulking or it's the new strategy.

BoJangles_2

pineapple wrote: »

I had it all planned for today. After not responding to the texts last night I sent a 'good morning' text late morning. Was going to follow it up with a suggestion to meet. But unusually no reply, nights, nada.
Maybe he is sulking or it's the new strategy.

Yep, toys outta pram, you didn't reply to him within a certain time frame that he has set.....now he'll make you wait for a time...to punish you lol

pineapple

FredG wrote: »

Being happy is all that's important. Alone or with someone.

Used to know someone who was very unhappy in her marriage but she was frightened of going it alone - of being alone.
But you can be even lonelier in the wrong relationship :huh:

FredG

pineapple wrote: »

Used to know someone who was very unhappy in her marriage but she was frightened of going it alone - of being alone.
But you can be even lonelier in the wrong relationship :huh:

100% right.

I'd rather be happy on my own than in a relationship that makes me miserable. Better to walk. Life is too short to give yourself custodial sentencing.

pineapple

BoJangles wrote: »

Yep, toys outta pram, you didn't reply to him within a certain time frame that he has set.....now he'll make you wait for a time...to punish you lol

He just rung now.
Straight in with 'Shall I pick you up at 6 o'clock'?
Me - 'Why'?
We had a drink a few days ago with a bunch of his friends who go out on Tuesdays and Thursdays early evening and it seems he assumed that I had pencilled Thursdays in my diary. :huh:
Told him I didn't want to go out - watching the election debate and the run up.
Him ' Well shall I call round for an hour or so before 6?
Me - no that's OK thanks just enjoying some 'me time' and I've sort of got the next couple of hours mapped out..
I suggested meeting up for a coffee tomorrow at the local farm shop (for the talk)
And then we could have a barbecue he says. And when I said not sure he said 'but I've got the meat.....' :wall: