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Nice People Thread No. 14, all Nice and Proper
Comments
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Great news Gen
And congratulations to the Tifosis. May you have a great many more years together X
I've been waiting for today for what feels like ages. Just made a huge (for me) mortgage overpayment Another day to look forward to tomorrow as the payment should show up then 0 -
Lydia, a lot of the teachers I know seem to be exhausted during term time.
Thanks. There is more to it than that with me, though. And I only do 55% FTE, so I have a lot less excuse to be exhausted than FT teachers.
Last time I saw my counsellor I discovered I'd only told her part of the story of all the "stuff" that happened to me, so I filled her in with a v brief version of the rest of it. She thinks it's an achievement to be doing as well as I am, which is nice, but I still don't want to stay only coping at this level.vivatifosi wrote: »Re tyres... keep meaning to mention due to Lydia's sig. Had two new tyres this week. Had plenty of tread, but had a fairly spectacular puncture as the side wall just split. It turns out that tyres have a recommended shelf life which mine had exceeded. Only an issue for people driving older cars, but thought I should mention. Fortunately mine went pop while turning a corner at v low speed. Shame they don't pick this up on MOT. I still had 5mm tread so thought they were ok.
Awww. Makes my day!
Thanks.
Gen, glad the radiologist went well. Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
How do people browse websites using their phones? The screen is too small, and fingers are too big. There's a world of difference between using a phone and a tablet.
I don't buy stuff using my tablet only because the tablet browser lacks auto fill. My desktop browser fills forms in for me, so it saves much time and is more accurate.
This is just a temporary issue I feel.
I attend webinars and teleconferences at some rather odd hours where we discuss the next set of challenges in the software world.
It does seem that gesture control and voice control will become ever more common. A lot of money is going into these areas of development.
The limitations of a small amount of glass on the screen and a comparitively fat finger will be thing of the past.0 -
. She thinks it's an achievement to be doing as well as I am, which is nice, but I still don't want to stay only coping at this level.
Last year I had a conversation with a friend that profoundly impacted on me negatively but I think might be longterm more helpful. I repeat it with caution because it really was not helpful at the time.
She does not know the full situation with me, just I don't keep so well now. We were emailing about something and a comment was made and I said...hmm, that doesn't sound like me, and she said, well, doesn't dpsound like the OLD you, sounds like you now.
After some towing and froing she said "what you might have to accept is that you have been like this for so long its become part of your nature. Even if you clicked your fingers and were in the situation you were in (before but now) now you would be acting like this I think, because this is who you have become, you cannot behave like this for so many years then just stop.
It really, really upset me. Because this person I live with neither looks nor feels like me a lot of the time. And its been a major difficulty in coping I think, the struggle with self acceptance. But after about six months I think she's right, If someone could flick a switch tomorrow and I was 'me again' , I think that the legacy is left and I would be a me who has been profoundly impacted. What ever happens after surgery etc I am coming to terms with the fact that this me is 'me', inside too. And that's not entirely comfortable because I'm not that fond of lots about her, but if I spend more time being annoyed and wishing things were different that's just more energy wasted and time gone by.0 -
lostinrates wrote: »Last year I had a conversation with a friend that profoundly impacted on me negatively but I think might be longterm more helpful. I repeat it with caution because it really was not helpful at the time.
She does not know the full situation with me, just I don't keep so well now. We were emailing about something and a comment was made and I said...hmm, that doesn't sound like me, and she said, well, doesn't dpsound like the OLD you, sounds like you now.
After some towing and froing she said "what you might have to accept is that you have been like this for so long its become part of your nature. Even if you clicked your fingers and were in the situation you were in (before but now) now you would be acting like this I think, because this is who you have become, you cannot behave like this for so many years then just stop.
It really, really upset me. Because this person I live with neither looks nor feels like me a lot of the time. And its been a major difficulty in coping I think, the struggle with self acceptance. But after about six months I think she's right, If someone could flick a switch tomorrow and I was 'me again' , I think that the legacy is left and I would be a me who has been profoundly impacted. What ever happens after surgery etc I am coming to terms with the fact that this me is 'me', inside too. And that's not entirely comfortable because I'm not that fond of lots about her, but if I spend more time being annoyed and wishing things were different that's just more energy wasted and time gone by.
Thank you. I know I will never be the old me again. Parts of the current me are good things that I have learnt and grown into and I wouldn't want to change anyway. But I believe there can be a future me that will have overcome some of the limitations of the present me. The level of coping that I am managing at the moment may be understandable, but that doesn't change the fact that my children (and especially DD) need more from me than the current me is capable of, and the current me doesn't enjoy life much. For both those reasons, I'm not content to stay the current me forever. This new counsellor gives me a realistic prospect of gradual sustainable improvement, so I am going for that.Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
The flicking of the switch is almost what has happened with me, I spent years thinking woe is me, or why me or when can I get off this merry go round and having little motivation for things.
Then last year, the first switch on was getting motivated to clear the hoarding, once that was done, everything else seemed to click into place with the weight loss being one of the final things.
I don't know why or how, although ex lovverr certainly gave me my confidence and self esteem back but it certainly felt like a switch suddenly getting into the right position.
Mind you, I also don't know how long it is going to last, or how strong it will be when things get tough but at the moment, life is feeling so much better.We made it! All three boys have graduated, it's been hard work but it shows there is a possibility of a chance of normal (ish) life after a diagnosis (or two) of ASD. It's not been the easiest route but I am so glad I ignored everything and everyone and did my own therapies with them.
Eldests' EDS diagnosis 4.5.10, mine 13.1.11 eekk - now having fun and games as a wheelchair user.0 -
Lir, I will copy a text I got this morning, and my reply. There was more I could have said, but I am capable of biting my tongue despite rumours to the contrary.
Don't quote, will delete:
Deleted0 -
The flicking of the switch is almost what has happened with me...
:beer::j:T:D
So pleased for you. Hope it lasts forever!Lir, I will copy a text I got this morning, and my reply....
Sending hugs. Lots of them.Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
Almost forgot... Sue, how did it go with the doctor yesterday? Or have you already told us and I missed it? Or would you rather not say?Do you know anyone who's bereaved? Point them to https://www.AtaLoss.org which does for bereavement support what MSE does for financial services, providing links to support organisations relevant to the circumstances of the loss & the local area. (Link permitted by forum team)
Tyre performance in the wet deteriorates rapidly below about 3mm tread - change yours when they get dangerous, not just when they are nearly illegal (1.6mm).
Oh, and wear your seatbelt. My kids are only alive because they were wearing theirs when somebody else was driving in wet weather with worn tyres.0 -
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