38 and Single :o(

shegirl

tea_lover wrote: »

OP - think outside the box, go to church If a single male in their 30s turned up at my church there would be an actual stampede :rotfl:.

That's actually a valid point :rotfl:I think most churches would need to call cattle control :rotfl:

neatheyc

tea_lover wrote: »

OP - think outside the box, go to church If a single male in their 30s turned up at my church there would be an actual stampede :rotfl:.

Church? Really? Never thought of that!

neatheyc

shegirl wrote: »

*Joins the queue*

Oh don't be such a spoil sport Vestan!

If it helps,I'm 33 and my dad is 85.Plenty of more mature men still make babies,it just generally requires a younger woman.

Don't write yourself off op,you're a good looking guy and seem nice enough. Being male you have time to reproduce and women tend to prefer older men.

I can't help with dating issues though, I'm afraid!

Thanks Shegirl. Looking at your profile picture, I'd imagine you're fighting them off with a stick!

kleapatra

Just out of interest - why did you not have any luck with POF? As a single 35 year old I use POF, Match and Tinder but probably use POF most. I get several messages a day, most days from various men and 9 times out of 10 I feel like banging my head against a wall based on either the message they have written or their profile. I'm seriously considering setting up online dating classes for men (and I am by no means an expert) as most seem to have no clue!
1) messages that just say hi or hey. Nothing else, just that.
2) messages that use text speak (I'm a grown up, not a teenager, no excuse for it) or the spelling and grammar is so horrendous I can't make head nor tail of the message.
3) Profiles that in the bit where you talk about yourself, just say 'ask'
4) Profiles with awful spelling/grammar
5) Profile pictures that have ex-girl friends in them, drugged tigers/assorted wildcats in them, so many people in the photo you don't know which one to look at.......
6) No profile picture at all - what are you trying to hide?
7) Profile picture with little (or no in some cases I've seen) clothing - not all woman are attracted to huge muscles!
8) Giving away far too much information - I saw a profile the other week where he 'mentioned' he had an issue with premature ejaculation - I didn't need to know that!

And these are just the issues I thought of quickly, given a bit longer I could quadruple this list easily!

So OP have a look at your profile and check yours doesn't have any of these problems!
Read their profile and send them a message based on what you've read - sounds simple but sooooo many people fall down on this!

Hope this helps your success rate!

neatheyc

kleapatra wrote: »

Just out of interest - why did you not have any luck with POF? As a single 35 year old I use POF, Match and Tinder but probably use POF most. I get several messages a day, most days from various men and 9 times out of 10 I feel like banging my head against a wall based on either the message they have written or their profile. I'm seriously considering setting up online dating classes for men (and I am by no means an expert) as most seem to have no clue!
1) messages that just say hi or hey. Nothing else, just that.
2) messages that use text speak (I'm a grown up, not a teenager, no excuse for it) or the spelling and grammar is so horrendous I can't make head nor tail of the message.
3) Profiles that in the bit where you talk about yourself, just say 'ask'
4) Profiles with awful spelling/grammar
5) Profile pictures that have ex-girl friends in them, drugged tigers/assorted wildcats in them, so many people in the photo you don't know which one to look at.......
6) No profile picture at all - what are you trying to hide?
7) Profile picture with little (or no in some cases I've seen) clothing - not all woman are attracted to huge muscles!
8) Giving away far too much information - I saw a profile the other week where he 'mentioned' he had an issue with premature ejaculation - I didn't need to know that!

And these are just the issues I thought of quickly, given a bit longer I could quadruple this list easily!

So OP have a look at your profile and check yours doesn't have any of these problems!
Read their profile and send them a message based on what you've read - sounds simple but sooooo many people fall down on this!

Hope this helps your success rate!

It is a lot different for females than males on POF. I think the number of males vs females on that site is outweighed 5-1 at least. I bet you get a lot of messages from males which gives you a good choice to choose from.

I do get messages from time to time. But these are from people living abroad or are a lot older than me. The odd one I get that I chat to but didn't take things further. Have also met up with a few that I have messaged. I believe that I am quite good at messaging. I try and read their profile and pick out something that interests me so I can ask about it when I send the first message.

I am guessing you girls get a lot of men that are after one thing, which gives us normal people a bit of a slow starter from the off as we have to proof we are not like that.

As for my profile, feel free to take a look yourself and let me know if there is anything wrong. Christmas_lover76

kleapatra

neatheyc wrote: »

It is a lot different for females than males on POF. I think the number of males vs females on that site is outweighed 5-1 at least. I bet you get a lot of messages from males which gives you a good choice to choose from.

I do get messages from time to time. But these are from people living abroad or are a lot older than me. The odd one I get that I chat to but didn't take things further. Have also met up with a few that I have messaged. I believe that I am quite good at messaging. I try and read their profile and pick out something that interests me so I can ask about it when I send the first message.

I am guessing you girls get a lot of men that are after one thing, which gives us normal people a bit of a slow starter from the off as we have to proof we are not like that.

As for my profile, feel free to take a look yourself and let me know if there is anything wrong. Christian_lover76

If you lived a lot closer I'd probably message you based on your profile! You sound lovely so I'm sure you'll find someone soon - it hasn't been that long!

~daisy~_2

lol - another one who had to log in to look !!

Im on POF and only had about 5 messages in a month and very rarely get any replies to sent messages either. Someone on here once said my profile was kind of lacking so changed it but hasnt made any difference.

i couldnt find your profile on there though but yes you like nice based on your pic here

kleapatra

~daisy~ wrote: »

lol - another one who had to log in to look !!

Im on POF and only had about 5 messages in a month and very rarely get any replies to sent messages either. Someone on here once said my profile was kind of lacking so changed it but hasnt made any difference.

i couldnt find your profile on there though but yes you like nice based on your pic here

change the name Christian to Christmas in your user name search

neatheyc

kleapatra wrote: »

change the name Christian to Christmas in your user name search

yes sorry, it's christmas_lover76

fivesquare

neatheyc wrote: »

Hi all,

Anyone got any advice on how to cheer myself up?

38 year old male and have been single again since the beginning of the year. Live alone in my flat. No children.

Look for the positives, it's easier to meet people when you don't have kids. And many of those without kids won't consider dating those with kids, they see them as 'baggage'.

I'm around your age but I have a child and I only have Fridays off (and Tuesdays, once in a blue moon). Now that's a real obstacle, being stuck at home in the evenings!



PS. I found OKCupid nicer than POF, there seem to be more people looking for long term partners than on POF. And you can try Tinder as well. Match.com isn't that expensive (£10/month if you pay a 6-month subcription) but not many on match.com are also on OKC...