Mediation

wannabe_sybil

Guest - if you were female I would recommend the Freedom Programme. It is recommended for women who have been/are in abusive relationships. I don't know if it will help a male perspective.

From what you have written you are/have been in an abusive relationship. Men suffer from Domestic Abuse as well. I believe the extremely underfunded and neglected male equivalent of Womens Aid is Mankind http://www.mankind.org.uk/ I strongly suggest that you have a look at their website and see if it has anything that you can identify with.

Research and support for female domestic abuse survivors is not very plentiful either, though more visible, but studies show it can take many attempts for a survivor to break free. It isn't easy.

Good luck

Guest101

Pixie5740 wrote: »

Unless she's had some intensive CBT or a complete personality transplant it is exactly what will happen.



It's your funeral. Enjoy your new home.

Thanks

Sorry, I'm really not running back for more hurt. It does feel different. Whether that's because she realised what could happen at court, or because I stood up to her (legally speaking). But i'm not rushing into anything at all.

Sorting out new home & seeing DS are top of the agenda.

Guest101

Fluff15 wrote: »

Completely agree. Guest I cannot believe that after all you have written, about her changing her mind and switching personalities, that you would consider that her current behaviour is actually going to last. Read back through your thread and take any 'equal terms' conversation with a massive pinch of salt.

We would be encouraging any woman who was in your position with a man to get out and stay out, and the advice is exactly the same for you.

Thanks.

I realise the possibility is strong that she will switch again. So i'm not commiting myself to anything in regards her.

It may end up in court, but if it's possible to sort things civilly that would be nice.

Stress has got me ill recently, and feel better now i have my home.

Guest101

mellymoo74 wrote: »

Pixie5740 you know from what you have seen, people sometimes need several goes round before they get it.

Guest101 - have a long think about WHY you would want to be with someone who
Lies to the police
Lies to your friends
Lies to you

TBH im not sure i do want to be with her. But i would prefer things be civil and maybe amicable. Better than DS being pulled from both ends.

Pixie5740 wrote: »

Very true. My brother has just gone back to his gf after another blazing row where she, yet again, said some very disgusting and hurtful things. I've also been listening to my friend for 3.5 years going on and on and on and on and on and on about her bf. She wants to get married and have children (she's 39 and they've been together for 6 years) and he doesn't. They've had more crisis talks than Israel and Palestine. I'm fatigued by it all.

Sorry :S

Guest101

justme111 wrote: »

When next time you feel sorry for yourself remember that you chosen the way things are by your actions . You been asked how the things are and you interpreted the question as "how your relationship with ex going". You did not really want time with your son without her , did you ?
When you have lean month don't forget it was due to expense of a few hundreds you had because of her not arranging contact properly and calling police.

Fair enough.

There wasnt an update on DS as they're away.
House move going well - as well as moving goes!
And there's been no new negative developements in regards my ex. Things have been civil and seem better at the minute.

Not going to break the calm when i've already got a lot on.

(and no there's been no 'romance' at all.)

Guest101

wannabe_sybil wrote: »

Guest - if you were female I would recommend the Freedom Programme. It is recommended for women who have been/are in abusive relationships. I don't know if it will help a male perspective.

From what you have written you are/have been in an abusive relationship. Men suffer from Domestic Abuse as well. I believe the extremely underfunded and neglected male equivalent of Womens Aid is Mankind http://www.mankind.org.uk/ I strongly suggest that you have a look at their website and see if it has anything that you can identify with.

Research and support for female domestic abuse survivors is not very plentiful either, though more visible, but studies show it can take many attempts for a survivor to break free. It isn't easy.

Good luck

Thank you, i've been reading that.

But I appreciate the point being made again.

Fluff15

Guest101 wrote: »

(and no there's been no 'romance' at all.)

Good! Keep it that way, you've come a long way. Sorry to hear about you not feeling well, but enjoy the new place.