Can anyone help please?

woodsig

Soleil_lune wrote: »

If that is the case, then maybe the OP should start opening his mother's mail. I would.

I understand that there is some truth in that statement, like if some mail comes for an ex tenant or ex owner of the property, you can open the mail (as long as you don't do anything lalicious with it,) but surely if the person LIVES at the property; that would be a different matter?

Maybe someone could clarify this?

OP, I would get a P.O. Box or look into the service someone mentioned.






Your mother sounds like a control freak, and very petty threatening you after looking at your social media comments,.... but I have to ask, how can she 'take your car off you?' Surely she didn't give you your car? :huh:

We share a car (me and my stepdad primarily. He works away so it's either leave a car at his workplace sat locked away or I use it), it was half and half paid for. But I still run it (mot, insurance and general repairs etc), whilst it's not as good as mine, it's pretty much mine.

j.e.j. wrote: »

That's a very good point. If she finds out that you're using the mail collect service would you mother go to the lengths of taking your passport/id and going to the royal mail to get your mail? :eek: It's better that she doesn't find out about it, AND/OR you need to start getting more assertive with her.

No, she'd go to the route of then compiling probably months worth of letters that's been kept going one by one demanding I show my bank statements or whatever. Drinking 53 units of alcohol in total a week can make you paranoid I guess

woodsig

Soleil_lune

woodsig wrote: »

Blackmailing me into saying if I don't sort out this bank something or sort out my phone bill etc (I had one direct debit fail last year and my mom opened that post) she will show the post to my dad and get me kicked out/car taken off me etc.

woodsig wrote: »

We share a car (me and my stepdad primarily. He works away so it's either leave a car at his workplace sat locked away or I use it), it was half and half paid for. But I still run it (mot, insurance and general repairs etc), whilst it's not as good as mine, it's pretty much mine.

woodsig

Oh I see now.

Still, you do need to get your post delivered somewhere else I think.

You mother's behaviour is awful.

atolaas

Can you afford to move out? That sounds like the easiest solution to me. Your mother's drinking is clearly effecting her behaviour.

woodsig

atolaas wrote: »

Can you afford to move out? That sounds like the easiest solution to me. Your mother's drinking is clearly effecting her behaviour.

Planning to move out towards the end of the year, start of next with my other half. I'm on enough to cover myself for rent at a decent place but not yet. I get this sorted with the collection of post then start planning.

woodsig

j.e.j.

woodsig wrote: »

Drinking 53 units of alcohol in total a week can make you paranoid I guess

woodsig

That's about a bottle of wine a day?

It's quite a lot but not as bad as some alkies, I guess..

melloecastro

Can you get it redirected to your OH/work? You can do it online?

Try and make as much as you can paperless. I get all my bank/insurance paperwork online now.

woodsig

melloecastro wrote: »

Can you get it redirected to your OH/work? You can do it online?

Try and make as much as you can paperless. I get all my bank/insurance paperwork online now.

I like to consider myself organised and most of my bank everything is paperless, but whilst most the time it may be odd junk like todays post was that has now gone (interflora voucher), from time to time it may be something to do with the bank, HMRC etc (tax rebate the joys).

woodsig

gettingtheresometime

tea_lover wrote: »

Send yourself a letter saying something along the lines off "p off you nosy mare". See if she keeps doing it after she's opened that one.

I would send one saying Mum ....you really need to stop opening my mail

onlyroz

I think you should bring forward your plans to move out. A room in a shared house shouldn't cost a huge amount, especially if you shared that room with your partner.

Better_Days

My mother would also think nothing of opening my post or that of my siblings 'in case it was anything important'. It was a lack of respect for boundaries - part of her narcissistic behaviour.

I agree that moving out sooner rather than later is a good idea and in the meantime collect your post from the delivery office.