Two people didn't turn up to stag do and I'm out £100

tain

Totally agree with what others are saying though. For my fianc!'s hen do, you weren't booked in until you'd paid your money. You asking for trouble if you're chasing money after things are booked.

j.e.j.

lulu_92 wrote: »

I wonder how the no-showers would feel if they were in the OP's shoes?

Personally I would re-imburse someone if I had said I'd go to something and they had paid for me, but I then couldn't go.

lulu_92

j.e.j. wrote: »

Personally I would re-imburse someone if I had said I'd go to something and they had paid for me, but I then couldn't go.

I would do the same. I just wonder how they would feel if it was OP that didn't turn up and they had organised it.

maxmiler

I would just like to say that this is clearly NOT the same as that little boy fiasco.

That event was paid for, and the little boy did NOT have to contribute, so I don't see how the birthday boy's, parents were ever out of pocket. OK, had they known that the little boy wouldn't come then they could have saved the money, but they invited him and paid for him so their costs were the same whether the little boy turned up or not.

This karting event is a bit different, as the organiser had to pay more from their own pocket because of the no-shows. But I can't think of a cost-effective way to get the dosh of these two men.

So it comes down to experience - learn not to do it again and get over it.

Cookie1986

It saddens me that this has happened on almost every stag party I have been on. I would talk to the groom as his two friends are more likely to respond to him. When I was the groom I also told my best man that I would guarantee all of my friends because I don’t think it’s fair for the best man to be out of pocket because of one of my friends (some of which he only met a couple of times beforehand).

All in all let this be a lesson to collect money in advance!

John_Gray

Surely there must be a No-Win, No-Fee firm of lawyers that would take up the case!

"Have you lost money over an event where some people did not pay you what they owed? Then call Crooks-R-Us lawyers, and we'll get you compensation!"

I mean, what else would you do? :beer:

simonp

Not sure I'd involve the bride/groom - they've really enough on their plates!

It doesn't really help but the mistake is yours for not collecting money beforehand. That's always been the case for similar events I've been on.

If you really can't get hold of the two guys then think you'll need to write it off

Soleil_lune

I can only echo what the peeps before me have said OP. I think you need to write it off if they don't give it you back, as there ain't a lot you can do really. Do ask for it back though! (At least once.) And in future, don't pay for anything in advance, without getting the dosh of folk first!

What ARE people like?! I would never dream of making someone pay for something for me, and then not pay them back! I don't know how some people sleep at night!

It's like these people who have nothing to do with a person for many many years, and then they turn up 20 years after last seeing them, to see if they have been left anything in the will, and act all snotty and snide if they get nothing, and someone else who has been close to the deceased person for many years, gets something!

This behaviour is basically a different slant on the 'entitled-to' culture. People who think the world owes them a living, and will take, take, take, but very rarely give anything back. If ever.

alggomas

Well, I would ask were they sick.
Another would be why did you not get everyone to pay at the beginning when you invited them?

You can mention this to the groom and ask him for their addresses so you can nicely suggest they pay you for no show.


However I would never arrange something like this with my own money.
What if 5 people could not make it.
This may show you that arranging things which involve sums of money, people must pay first!

Snakey

lulu_92 wrote: »

I wonder how the no-showers would feel if they were in the OP's shoes?

It wouldn't happen. To start with they wouldn't organise it in the first place, but if they did they would automatically make everybody pay up front because they'd assume that everybody else is exactly like them. The OP is in this situation because it didn't occur to him for one second that any of these complete strangers could possibly let him down.

The only excuse the no-shows have is if the OP did not make it clear that it was being paid for in advance and that it wasn't refundable. And this does sometimes happen when the OP is naive as above and just assumes that everything will turn out exactly as planned and there'll be no issues. Most people don't do a lot of things like go-karting in their everyday lives and so it's not the case that everybody "ought to know" that there will be a non-refundable deposit. If the no-shows didn't know that anybody would be out of pocket, then they aren't guilty of anything worse than letting the groom down by not coming to his do.

I think most people learn this lesson at some point in their lives. Don't lend money to people unless you are happy to never see it again. You can try more e-mails, and of course it's possible that they intend to pay you but are disorganised/lazy (as we already know), but I suspect you'll find yourself in the position where you have to either chalk it up to experience or sour the wedding by making a thing about it (since I expect that will be your only chance to collect).