suspicions confirmed

DUTR

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

Ditto. I'd be making my plans quietly (ie giving the tenants notice, so that I could move back into my own home).

snip

EDIT:Whatever prompted him to keep a video like that on his phone? How tacky and it does rather make me wonder whether (at a subconscious level) he set himself up deliberately hoping you would see it at some point. Maybe he's trying to chuck you indirectly (ie by setting you up to do it for him)? Maybe he's trying to keep you, but have his cake and eat it and that's his way of trying to impose a "cake and eat it" way of living on you against your will? Either way...I wouldn't dream of keeping him in my life for one minute (except the few "plan to move out" months you need).

Why are you focusing on the video? It's little different from having photos on his phone, also to watch a video you have to go through various menus, would have been easier to go through text messages perhaps.

sneekymum

The video is interesting.

It has me wondering if the phone was propped somewhere? Or was it held by a third party?

DUTR

sneekymum wrote: »

The video is interesting.

It has me wondering if the phone was propped somewhere? Or was it held by a third party?

It could be held by an observer or the OP's partner (depending on what scene was involved) or it could be a video camera on a tripod and then the footage transfered onto the handset (which would give the recent date) . But having the video is little different from having pictures as they are just reliving the moments.

SnooksNJ

DUTR wrote: »

Why are you focusing on the video? It's little different from having photos on his phone, also to watch a video you have to go through various menus, would have been easier to go through text messages perhaps.

That's true, video's are hard to watch on phones. But with a few steps you can make it a lot easier for him and his ex to watch it by putting it on his facebook page.

AnnieO1234

Are you absolutely one hundred per cent certain this a brand new video? Could it be that the ex has sent an old one in a vain attempt to win him back? Could it be his ego that's lead him to keep it not delete it? Perhaps he re-set his phone from an earlier back up and that's why it's there. He may not even be aware it's re-appeared. (Just thinking of iPhones.)

Yes you've had reason to snoop, but you do not have absolute proof of anything beyond at some point he slept with another woman and videoed it. Now unless he had a recent tattoo that is in the video I'm not sure you will ever really know the truth unless he tells you himself.

Xxx

Buzzybee90

DUTR wrote: »

It could be held by an observer or the OP's partner (depending on what scene was involved) or it could be a video camera on a tripod and then the footage transfered onto the handset (which would give the recent date) . But having the video is little different from having pictures as they are just reliving the moments.

Are you just trying to tell us you're in to that kind of thing, dutr? Lol

It's recent so that's the main issue, but even if it was from years ago... Why on earth would he keep it?

DUTR

Buzzybee90 wrote: »

Are you just trying to tell us you're in to that kind of thing, dutr? Lol

It's recent so that's the main issue, but even if it was from years ago... Why on earth would he keep it?

I know a large minority of people that have video's of past events, femail's included.

Even if the video was recent, perhaps he is getting something elsewhere that he is not getting at home, the OP has to make a new future if it is not acceptable to her, the video contained two consenting adults and now a non consenting viewer.

There is distrust in the relationship on various levels, would the OP have posted if she hadn't discovered anything untoward?
They have had conversations in the past so it has and always be on their mind (whether it as really happening or not) .

Kim_kim

You need to keep quite & carry on as normal while getting your house back as fast as humanly possible.
You can't trust this man, yours & your children's stability & a roof over your head & a home must be your priority.

Buzzybee90

DUTR wrote: »

I know a large minority of people that have video's of past events, femail's included.

Even if the video was recent, perhaps he is getting something elsewhere that he is not getting at home, the OP has to make a new future if it is not acceptable to her, the video contained two consenting adults and now a non consenting viewer.

There is distrust in the relationship on various levels, would the OP have posted if she hadn't discovered anything untoward?
They have had conversations in the past so it has and always be on their mind (whether it as really happening or not) .

Really? Very creepy imo.

DUTR

Kim_kim wrote: »

You need to keep quite & carry on as normal while getting your house back as fast as humanly possible.
You can't trust this man, yours & your children's stability & a roof over your head & a home must be your priority.

The OP stated they have a property of their own, they are not her partner's children so they didn't appear from nowhere, she has to lick her wounds and move on to the next guy, this current guy will have little or no regrets he has the video to prove it.