New Alcohol self help

Bogof_Babe

lewt wrote: »

i find i dont have enough time now, as im thinking and doing other stuff than drinking or getting or think about getting drink....... do you find the same ?

I might when the weather gets warmer and there are more things I want to do, but at the moment I am quite happy to just spend my extra waking time on here or my other couple of fave sites, cosy in front of the fire.

I don't work (retired early) so tend to have plenty of "me" time anyway. It's lovely waking up bright and fresh every morning, but it hasn't stopped me having a lie-in with the radio, a huge mug of tea and a bit of a read before getting the day underway.

masterthief

can I ask you guys a question?....


I find that I can (once in the mood) go for long periods without drinking at all (last time I drank was back in april or may or something), but when I go to a pub I can't just have one (or two) drinks and leave, like some people do. I have to have at least 3 or 4 and that often turns into more than 3 or 4.

I also find that I've never really had the so-drunk-I-pass-out-in-a-public-place-or-mates-room issue, nor have I got so wrecked I can't remember what I did the next day or disgraced myself too much. That said, I can (and often have) consumed vast amounts of alocohol, like an entire bar-sized bottle of southern comfort neat pints in one night, but I feel (and my friends have regularly commented that I am) remarkably coherent and sober-seeming when I have consumed this much.

I always this 'ability' a good thing, until I came across this quote from Gary Oldman (on imdb.com) - "There's an uncanny thing that chemically happens to you when you're in the chronic stages of alcoholic drinking. I have been able, on occasions, to have two bottles of vodka and still be up talking to people. That got very frightening." That sounds exactly like my state when I've been drinking.

I tell people that I have 'a problem with alcohol' but that I'm not 'an alcoholic' in the standard sense, if you get what I mean. Nowadays I try not to drink, but don't beat myself up about it on the few occasions when I do. I feel like I'm not an alcoholic yet,but could become one if I don't monitor my drinking and try not to drink. I was wondering what you're thoughts were.

Sorry for the long post and for jumping inot this thread, but I had considered going to an AA meeting to ask them and didn't want them to think I was taking the you-know-what since I've not had many 'bad' experiences with alcohol.

brodev

Hi Masterthief. I cannot tell you if you are an alcoholic or not. I am not qualified to do so. I can tell you what I know. Alcoholism is an illness that does not start as a chronic condition. In a way it is a bit like a pregnant woman. Sometimes it is very obvious to everybody and at other times it is not know about at all. The more time that passes the more obvious it becomes. It makes no difference, if you are pregnant you are pregnant. Likewise with alcoholism. As most people don't like the word ALCOHOLIC there are many pseudonyms used instead. Like all illnesses not all sufferers have exactly the same symptoms. This gives most alcoholics the great escape to carry on with the magnificent obsession, to drink socially. The definition of an alcoholic that I use for myself is: A person who cannot guarantee his/her actions after taking one drink. If, like me, it is a number of years since you have had a drink my definition includes you. It is certainly nothing to do with the number of times a week, a month or even a year, that someone gets drunk. As far as I am concerned it is about losing control.
A friend of mine in AA, long dead now, who fought in WW2, told me that everybody in his unit drank the way he did, as much as possible whenever possible. The problem was at the end of the war they all returned to normality and he tried but could not. I don't know if this has helped or not but the only opinion that is of any use to you is your own

lewt

can i suggest maybe going to the meeting you have though about and see if anyones drinking is like yours then speaking to them, i've found so many different kinds of drinker in AA i thought everyone there would all live in the park, but everyone i met has drank diffrent to the others....
i think its a case of if you think its a problem then maybe it is........ let us know how you ge on.

Taffyscot

master dont apologise for posting here and welcome. I will write more tomorrow but it is a progressive illness and NO ONE in AA will think you are taking the p----. they will welcome you with open arms and explain things to you about the physical, mental and spiritual illness that it is. taffy

masterthief

thanks for your responses, much appreciated. maybe I have a naive and tv-influenced view of AA and similar, that everyone there will be talking about how drinking has ruined relationships, etc., and as I have no such issues thats why I felt they might think I was worrying over nothing, so to speak. As I'm currently doing fine without needing to go to meetings, I'm think I'm ging to carry on as I am, but I'm gonna find out what help is available in my local area and keep thhat info in a safe place just in case things change.

brodev - interesting thing you said about defining alcoholism as losing control - that's something I've never/very rarely experienced. the problem I have is that if I were to drink today, I would keep drinking until the bottle ran dry, be it a bottle of wine or a bottle or spirits. when I said I view it more as 'a problem with alocoho' than 'alcoholism' I kinda meant that, if anything, I think I'm in the early stages of alcoholism, because I can go quite comfortably months without drinking but when I do drink, I really do drink. thats why the gary oldman quote got my attention - I can drink a bottle or two of brandy and still have a conversation with someone.

I've decided not to drink anymore while I'm still at a point where making that decision and sticking to it is pretty easy to do (i.e. there's alcohol in the house now and has been for months, but I've not touched it and have felt no urge to touch it). The way I see it, there is a chance I could continue drinking and not have any problems (aside from a pickled liver, lol), but that chance isn't a risk worth taking because if my drinking did get worse, I could end up in a place I can't get out of, or have difficulty getting out of.

seriously appreciate the comment you've all left - I've spoken about it this to friends but I'm only a couple of years out of uni so no one really took it too seriously. most ppl thought the fact that I don't get out of control when I drink meant it couldn't be/wasn't a problem, whereas I thought the fact that once I start drinking I have to drink a fair amount was a problem regardless of how in/out of control it made me.

again, many thanks.

lewt

Hey masterT, i thought AA was just a room full of people sitting crying, proberely a dusty church hall or something. i dunno where i got that idea from but i was wrong.

i'll find a link in a min, but what i have learnt is that i have an alergy to alcohol that once i start something happens in my body that does not happen in my brother something known as the phenonom of craving that is to strong for me to control. i always knew i coulnd not have one. but didnt know why. this helps me understand. i'll get that link now.

lewt

http://www.step12.com/silkworth-doctors-opinion.html

brodev

masterthief wrote: »

brodev - interesting thing you said about defining alcoholism as losing control - that's something I've never/very rarely experienced. the problem I have is that if I were to drink today, I would keep drinking until the bottle ran dry, be it a bottle of wine or a bottle or spirits.

My opinion is that if you intend every time to drink the whole bottle then you still have control but, if like me, on occasions you did not intend to drink the whole bottle then I would suggest that you have maybe lost control. I also have known people who have said that as I always drink the whole bottle then I know in advance that I will so I still have control. This thinking is an example of the escape clause for controlled drinking.
One thing I have learned is that I cannot convince anybody to stop drinking. I can tell them what my experience and others is, but as I have said before, the only important opinion is your own. If you have a truly open mind then I would suggest that you go to an AA meeting and see what the experience is like.
One other thing "hollow legs" is one of the early symptoms of alcoholism

lewt

whats hollow legs devon ?