New Alcohol self help

Taffyscot

shazrobo wrote: »

i have things to do, i have books to read, computer games alsorts, but find it so hard to sit down and do any of them, cant concentrate at mo. darent put tv, cos thats wen i would drink in front of tv., so i come online again and again. getting a babysitter is not an easy option, because my friends have children too,
thanks again for your support
shaz x

shaz you won't be able to concentrate to read for a while until the quagmire in your head settles from the alcohol. I know I used to love to read and went through a period of depression and lonliness and I could not concentrate to read at all. What I did find was that I got some talking books from the library on cassette or cd and I could actually listen to them and comprehend but reading was going in one eye and out the other so to speak.

Shaz there are chat groups on the internet for AA members and you don't have to be one. Just the desire to try and stop drinking one day at a time. The nice thing about the groups is that you can get an instant reply or word of encouragement. Lots are still drinking but trying to find how to cope. Hang in there.
One AA guy last week hadn't seen his grown up boys for 10 years and he has been sober for 5. Lo and behold they knocked at his door a few weeks ago and said they wanted to meet their sober dad. Made me cry to hear it. Just think how much better you will be for your kids a sober mum for xmas.
Taffy

Taffyscot

Hip you make me laugh and cry with your comments too. My kids are in Canada and I don't see them on xmas. I hate it feel so sad. Wonder how my boy is coping is he drinking, is he ok. Just another day for me too cook a normal meal and like you I am lucky I can walk along the sea coast. It is too bleeding cold right now tho the sea is raging and the wind is howling. I really dislike xmas and all the hypocrisy around it and people overspending. YOu should have seen the amount of booze people had in their shopping carts tonight. think of all the money you are saving to buy something nice for yourself. How long is it not Hip that you have been off the booze? Keep posting doesn't matter how long they are it's like a joking AA meeting. I enjoy reading them anyway. Brrrrrrrrrrrr it's cold Taffy

brodev

It is a long time since I had some of the feelings that I have been reading about. Drinking was absolute hell for me but it held a promise, that it never kept, that this time I would feel so much better after this drink. When I stopped I lost this promise and I had to live with the stark reality that there was no instant cure for my feelings. I didn't like this. I was always very lonely and I always felt unloved. I tried not to let people get too near me because I was afraid they would hurt me. I had a tremendous capacity for hurt. I was also desperate for people to like me. Amidst all this confusion I was staying sober and going to meetings. When I wasn't at meetings I was usually on my own.
I don't know if the posters feel like this or not but their posts have brought these memories flooding back. That's what they are nowadays, memories not present day feelings. I gradually began to have faith in AAs and then in my family and then in the public at large. It took time, but it happened. I wish that there was an instant cure but as my sponsor used to say to me "there are no magic wands". that was something I didn't like to hear but he always said it with a smile which took the hurt out of it. Staying sober has given me so much that sometimes I forget some details. I am grateful for the reminders I have had today and I do hope that everybody has a happy and sober Xmas.

Taffyscot

thanks brod for your honesty there. It is nice to hear of someone coming out the other side. It is so encouraging and that is what I find in AA it is an encouragement of each other and of each and every one's accomplishments. Are you male or female Brod? I do not know why I want to know but was wondering if there are any male posters on here. Taffy

[Deleted User]

Good to hear from everyone. Shaz - HAPPY BIRTHDAY! I'm glad you were able to mark it with a meal out. Hope your boys acknowledged the day at some level.

Brodev - your recollections say exactly how it is in my world right now. "This too shall pass" is what I've heard too.

I stopped drinking on 7 December 2006 so this is my second sober Christmas. However, I was in rehab until 14th December last year and went straight back to work. I was so euphoric to be free of the booze and it was great to sober that I coasted through the three days off work - I had a weeks work to catch up on in those days!! The difference this time is that I'm tired (work is very busy/stressful) and I have more time off work than I've ever had before - 6 days.

For all my self-absorption, I do think of you all each day and hope that all will be well and manageable for each of you as we take this journey called life!

Thank you once more.
Hiphouse

brodev

Taffyscot I was going to say I was a man but I don't know if I have grown up that much. But I am certainly a big boy. :cheesy:

Bogof_Babe

Just checking in to say Hi and I'm still being good. Eight weeks tomorrow since my last drink :A . I seem to be finding it easier than some of you, which must just be the luck of the draw as I claim no super strong willpower - I just haven't felt the need for one. I'm too busy having hot flushes and drinking gallons of water!

Hope you all have a peaceful and stress-free Christmas. I'll be thinking of "us" and raising a glass of bitter lemon on the day, to our continued success and strength.

Taffyscot

brod glad there are some blokes posting on here. OOeee I am glad that you are a big boy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bogof bogof wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll done people say that every day without a drink the craving gets less and less. That is a tremendous achievement count the days babe count the days. Taffy
Ahahahah come on in no one is judging we just wanna know you are ok. Taffy

Taffyscot

Lol Al. Well done you too and yes it is a sign of trust but more than that it is a sign that you are coping with your illness and they can breath again. Bit like offering a big box of choccies around when you know there is a diabetic in the house. When you know she is in control of her illness you feel free to be able to do that. If the person wasn't then you wouldn't feel comfortable with the choccies or the booze being offered. Thanks for sharing Al
Taffy

[Deleted User]

Hello Al

It's lovely to see you on the board again. I've been following your story for a long time - from the first thread that began here. That must have been a couple of years ago if not more? I was a lurker then and knew I had to stop drinking, but just couldn't go past one day without a drink which led to the inevitable black out. As time progressed the drinking got worse - rapidly worse - and in December 2006 I booked into the Priory for a week of detox. Your story was instrumental in supporting me in my recovery. Thank you.

Thank you too to Brodev for sharing your experience, strength and hope. I went to a meeting last night and asked a lady to be my sponsor - a huge step forward for me and this thread has been instrumental in that. I'm beginning to trust again. For those that don't know - a sponsor is like a buddy who supports you to stay sober.

I've logged onto this thread because I cannot get thoughts for Shaz and Taffy out of my head. Today is Christmas Day and with all the expectations, family togetherness and all that I feel for you. Shaz I hope that you're doing OK as you deal with the trauma of the break up of your relationship. I spoke with a girl yesterday whose husband left her 5 months after she got sober. He admitted to her that he preferred it when she was "F***ed up" (his words) and she understands now that it wasn't her fault that the marriage broke down and she accepts that the priority now is to create a life for herself, with the support of as many people as she can. She immediately made me think of you and I just wanted to share that - not sure if it's any help at all, but I just wanted to acknowledge your pain and let you know that I'm thinking of you and hoping that all shall be well for you.

Taffy, I think of you too on Christmas Day as thoughts turn to your son in Canada. I wish you strength and courage to get through this day and the holiday season. I have been holding your son in my thoughts. As part of my plans for Christmas day I hope to go to a Christmas service at 9.30am. I will light a candle for your son and all the other alcoholics out there who have yet to reach out for help.

I wish everyone peace and hope and the strength to take one day at a time. I do hope that lurkers will come out and join us today.

Hiphouse