Coping with Xmas Day - help please

Jagraf

We have one less parent this christmas too. My OH dad was a pain but we would love to have him around this year to moan about. My mum has just been given the all clear from breast cancer too. Can't wait to wait on her.

mummyroysof3

I'll be thinking of my family in Devon though who will be having a difficult first Christmas without my grandad who died earlier this month. There are my people in that sort of situation but I don't believe that stops us from having a moan about other situations though

Lucyadams184

If only you could choose your family. I feel your pain as I hate going to my in laws, they are rubbish at cooking and I hate being there. However for my husbands sake I just bite my tongue and think of my wine chilling at home which gets opened as soon as I get in. Good Luck.

Jagraf

notanewuser wrote: »

I didn't marry my husband's family................... Also, things change.

Kids don't choose their parents either but it would be nice if they still thought about them. I don't choose my boss but I'm still grateful for a job. I don't choose my neighbours but I would still help them out.

I didn't many my husbands family either but they are my daughters aunties, uncles and grandparents.

Metranil_Vavin

I would give anything to have my Dad around this Christmas

Jagraf

mummyroysof3 wrote: »

I'll be thinking of my family in Devon though who will be having a difficult first Christmas without my grandad who died earlier this month. There are my people in that sort of situation but I don't believe that stops us from having a moan about other situations though

A moan is ok.

notanewuser

Jagraf wrote: »

Kids don't choose their parents either but it would be nice if they still thought about them. I don't choose my boss but I'm still grateful for a job. I don't choose my neighbours but I would still help them out.

I didn't many my husbands family either but they are my daughters aunties, uncles and grandparents.

Hmmmmm. I treat them as family when they behave like it.

Faith177

Metranil_Vavin wrote: »

I would give anything to have my Dad around this Christmas

Me too this is our 24th without mine and I still miss him as much as the 1st Christmas it does get a little easier but not by much. Will still always raise a glass to him and he is never far from our thoughts

Best wishes to you & your family Metranil xx

74jax

I am having my Mum and Dad this year, many on here will know my dad is sooooo poorly, he's had terminal cancer for 3 years and the amount of times we've been told he won't last much longer. I am THRILLED he's here this year with me and not my brother.

I can't stand my mother, I can barely be in the same room as her and be civil for more than half an hour.

However they come as a package, I am so excited for one more Christmas with my dad I can put up with her for 3 days if it means Dad's life is easier for the duration as we aren't aurguing/nit picking and he's getting worked up.

Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and see the whole picture. I can let things wash over me for 3 days, I've plans to get very drunk after they've both gone back on Saturday

mgdavid

DFlights wrote: »

........
It's been a rough year and I just want a quiet one this year, but I have to just do this. I'm not terribly sociable at the best of times, and don't do the whole family get together thing as I don't understand why on earth I'd want to be around people just because they're related in some way to me (my family were horrible), and I guess OH's parents don't get that. Then again, I never told them the half of what my parents did to me as I don't like raking it up.

I'd say you have non-trivial psychological issues here - I'd recommend some counselling as this is fixable. Surely you can see that you being in a better place, being more sociable, more tolerant, less miserable and ungrateful, will lead to a better quality of life for both you and those around you?