My OH is in hospital in intensive care

Ettenna

My daughter had her accident in September and was still in the HDU for Christmas (it's also her birthday). She had just managed to come back from having an,operation at another hospital. Because she was only 20 miles away from home, some family went to see her on the day and I spent Christmas Day evening with her after the other girls had gone to their father. The second and subsequent Christmases are a bit different because she is now in a neuro rehab hospital 45 moles away. Last year I was the only person to see her - everyone else has small children, etc. It will be the same this year. But she probably doesn't know any different.

Is it "just" internal injuries that your OH has or does he have head injuries as well?

Don't forgot to keep yourself well and don't be afraid of telling people how you feel and what you want. And let the children know how you feel as well - it's so easy to hide it a pretend that everything's ok x

cazziebo

My sister was in ICU for three weeks and the hospital is 160 miles away from me. I visited every single day bar 3. Our brother visited three times. She thinks he never left her bedside and thinks I was there a only a few times! (I'm self employed so easier for me, my brother has two younger children)

Seriously, you do have to look after yourself. The patient has a whole team of people caring for them, but you are essentially on your own, and you carry the burden for other people as well. That is a lot for one human to bear.

I can only speak for my own experience, but I'm sure it's not unique. Having a relative in ICU is a long haul during and after. It's much more difficult in the HDU and the wards to get answers and to speak to the right people. The patient gets told, but my sister was in no condition to understand any information given to her. She had so many specialists - neurologist, neurosurgeon, orthopaedic surgeon, vascular surgeon - and it was difficult keeping track of who was doing what when. Two years on and we've now added physiotherapist, occy therapist, psychologist and psychiatrist. You need to be in a good mental and physical state to deal with all that and that's not possible if you're exhausted.

I've said it before but worth repeating. Do have a look at the ICU steps website - gives a good insight into what to expect after a relative leaves ICU.

Having said all that - looks like you're coping brilliantly. What an amazing job you're doing - and coming on here to update us. It really is appreciated and I hope you can feel the positive vibes from us all xx

torbrex

Wishing you all the best at the start of a new week.

I can't think of any questions that you can ask the consultant if you get to see them today but be sure to ask him/her to speak in plain language as they are fond of technical jargon sometimes.

Ms_Chocaholic

Just wondered how you all are today.

mum2one

Ms Chocaholic as they say great minds think alike...


really hope everything went ok 2day xxxx

RuthnJasper

mum2one wrote: »

Ms Chocaholic as they say great minds think alike...


really hope everything went ok 2day xxxx

Me too... but we'll hear whatever is to be heard when Victory has a moment to share her updates...

Incidentally - and this isn't directed specifically at Victory - I've just got home after seeing the 'Paddington' film at the cinema. If you need a safe, hearty laugh at the moment this is an ideal 90-minute "safety valve". I didn't realise how much I needed one myself until I saw my mum crying with laughter as much as I was...

Apologies for crashing in with my off-topic opinion. Love to all, especially Victory and her family. xx

mum2one

RuthnJasper wrote: »

Me too... but we'll hear whatever is to be heard when Victory has a moment to share her updates...

Incidentally - and this isn't directed specifically at Victory - I've just got home after seeing the 'Paddington' film at the cinema. If you need a safe, hearty laugh at the moment this is an ideal 90-minute "safety valve". I didn't realise how much I needed one myself until I saw my mum crying with laughter as much as I was...

Apologies for crashing in with my off-topic opinion. Love to all, especially Victory and her family. xx

You've done me a favour, was debating about the film, being a child that grew u with Paddington, def will see if DD wants to go, xx

RuthnJasper

mum2one wrote: »

You've done me a favour, was debating about the film, being a child that grew u with Paddington, def will see if DD wants to go, xx

All I can say, M21, is that you won't be disappointed. I loved the 1970s series too and put-off my mum twice before agreeing to take her tonight. Almost all the way home she was smiling and planning to take my brother's children during the Christmas holidays, so that she could watch it again (don't anyone tell her that I've suspected her, or I'm toast... )!

I've no connection with the film company (more's the pity) and I apologise once more for the thread-jack. No slight or harm meant. xx

torbrex

getting worried

duchy

Must admit I've been checking back for updates too and am concerned we've not heard from Victory today too.