My OH is in hospital in intensive care

tesuhoha

I've only just seen this. I hope your husband starts to recover soon.

If its any comfort at all I have watched lots of A&E programmes on tv and they show critically injured people. Quite often they show them a week or so later and they have come leaps and bounds. So although it looks bad now, hopefully you will soon see signs of improvement.

Best wishes.

GoldenShadow

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you xxx

Tigsteroonie

Only just seen the thread Vic ... You, your OH & your family will be in my thoughts & in Marley's prayers xx

Stripes_The_Elephant

Thinking of you Victory, wishing your hubby a speedy recovery x Stripes x

Pidge_jen

Sorry to hear your news, Victory. As an ex-ITU nurse, he is definitely in the best place and will be getting fantastic care. Try and remember your hubby is definitely in there and can hear you talking so chat away. It will feel odd at first but there is evidence that hearing familiar people's voices help. Tell him the time and date too - disorientation is extreme in ITU, and anything that helps him orientate slightly will be beneficial (even if he appears unconscious, he may be able to hear you). The wires and tubes are scary as hell (I've seen someone I know as a patient in ITU and never appreciated how hard it was for the relatives until then) but your other half is still in there.
Talk to the staff, they are very supportive and can help with practical things like parking permits, sick notes, etc as well as the physical illnesses. Look after yourself, you will need your strength for the coming weeks. Make it clear to family and friends that although they are anxious for news, it needs to be delivered as and when you feel ready - maybe sons can help with this, and the idea of a Facebook group is a good one. I will be thinking of you.

Anoneemoose

I have no words of wisdom but I just wanted to send my best wishes for you and your family Victory. What an absolutely awful thing to be going through. I really, really hope things improve soon for you all.

You sound like you are doing an amazing job (even though you might not think it). Lots of love to you all.xx

nearlyrich

Sorry to hear this Victory hope he gets well soon, look after yourself too x

greatsite_2

Thinking of you all. Stay strong X

*~Zephyr~*

Any updates? I hope you're ok victory. You're in my thoughts x

Ettenna

I have seen ICU from both sides - as a relative and as a nurse (albeit a final placement student nurse). My daughter was in a car crash and was in neuro intensive care. It was the scariest time of my life. On one hand I had a bit of knowledge but on the other hand I was her mother. I remember being asked to leave for 20 minutes and not being called back for an hour - as a relative you don't know what is going on in there but now as a nurse I know that it does take that long to change their bed, turn them, freshen them up, do their drugs, talk with doctors. Ask questions if you don't understand. Any doctor or nurse worth their salt should be willing to tell you what is going on. As a student nurse having been a relative, I knew that it's often the small things that counted. On my placement, the staff knew that I had experienced ICU saw a relative and they asked me for my input into what was good or bad about what they were doing and how they could improve the patient and relative experience in ICU. It was the little things like ensuring the patient is shaved, their ears and nose are clean and teeth brushed, making sure dentures were in (where it was safe to do so), knowing that they had been talked to and seeing that their lips had been moisturised!

The brilliant thing about ICU is that it is 1:1 care (or 1:2 on HDU). This means that your OH will have one nurse concentrating on him and him only. Talk to him. Orientate him to time and place. Chat about random rubbish that is going on in the world.

As others have said, don't take anything in to him, especially if he is still in a medically induced coma. There often isn't much storage available and everything he needs can be provided by the unit (they will often use special mouth gel, toothpaste and cleansers) and also their gowns will be cleaned by them. Without seeming gross, you don't want to be taking home pyjamas covered in faeces.

When my daughter was out of neuro ICU, after about a month, she went to a HDU because she then had a trachy. When this time came, I took her own nighties in so that she was a person rather than just a patient. She remained on HDU for another 3 months before going off to neuro rehab.

Take time out for yourself. It's very difficult in those first few days. Be selfish. He is your OH. Let other people worry about themselves. Rope in friends to make meals for you, even if it's for you to reheat them later when you get home. Don't be afraid to ask for help from your doctor either. Sleeping tablets and further down the line possibly anti depressants. I left it too long before I seemed help and I still suffer now - PTSD is just one of the things.

ICU Steps are great. I had an input into designing the booklet that should be in most ICU's now. If it's not available to you, download it (I think you can do this!). Also, ask if the ICU has got their own booklet, if you haven't been given one already.

Try not to listen to scare stories that people will inevitably tell you. Equally try to be realistic. Your OH probably won't be bouncing out of there in a few days time. It takes quite a bit of recovery just to get over a stay on ICU, even a planned stay. Don't compare him to other people in there. Everyone's journey is different.

Good luck, it's a hard journey.