How do I live ??

Johnnytwostep

societys_child wrote: »

:rotfl:


Thankfully I wasn't drinking a cup of coffee when I read that, it'd have been all over the keyboard now . . .

especially on that wage, women want a man who commands a proper salary

Listerbelle

I agree with many of the previous commenters.

There is a saying that goes along the lines of "it's not about how much you earn but how much you hold onto".

You need to look very closely at how every single pound you earn is being allocated/spent.

There is another saying I like, which is something along the lines of "lead the lives others wont, so you can have the life others can't" which to me means scrimping and saving and being wise with your money early on in life, so that you can do what you want with your life later. ie Stop working in your 40s or 50s. I know this is a long way off, but sometimes life goes by quickly!

Jitterbug123

Firstly, why are you spending that much on bills?

Secondly, if you can't afford things you don't do them. I don't have a car because I can't afford to do that and save, so I make do without. When I have other priorities then maybe I'll get one.

You do seem very whiney.

As a 26 year old that pays rent, bills, doesn't have a car, doesn't go on holiday often, but manages to deal with that then I think you kinda need to either get over it, or if you want more money apply for another job?

dannim12345

Firstly look into getting a more well paid job or reducing your outgoings.

Secondly why won't this a girl you meet be able to contribute to the property? You don't need to have a baby straight away?! It could be years before you need to think about that, plenty of time to save and/or improve your prospects (you & your partner). I'm a 25 year old girl (with a decent wage) and would not expect my partner to support me financially...

Cautious_Optimist

Pixie5740 wrote: »

I find this quite offensive, making out like women are greedy graspers only interested in someone's bank balance.




Where do you get this rubbish from?!

OP, you're clearly not happy being 26 and still living at home. Only you can change this. What do you want out of life? Do you want to settle down and have 2.4 children? Do you want to see something of the world? Do you enjoy your current job or would you like to do something else? Can you retrain, get some new qualifications or start up your own business?

You're 26, making £1,000 a month and living at home so have very few outgoings, surely you have some savings behind you which you could use to do any of the things I've suggested above.

You just need to to figure out what you want and have some gumption.

I'm not saying all women expect the man to look after them financially.
But in my experience, as you get older, women seem to place more emphasis on financial security and less on "being a cool guy" etc.
I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm saying it's something he needs to consider.

Obviously many women in their 30-40 will have more career progression behind them, so may be more financially independent...

But they may also have children from previous relationships.

It obviously depends on the type of women you date. But also on the type of woman who will date you!

When I was in my early twenties I hardly ever dated women with kids. Now, I'm older, most women who are interested in me, do have kids.

Also I noticed when I got to my thirties, that the women my age who were not yet married with kids etc (often successful women) became much keener to find a relationship that was likely to lead to marriage.
This was good in that they were interested in dating me, but they also didn't want to "waste time" if the relationship wasn't going anywhere..

Anyway, you're basically agreeing with my advice to OP; which is sort his career out and broaden his horizons.

Cautious_Optimist

dannim12345 wrote: »

Firstly look into getting a more well paid job or reducing your outgoings.

I'm a 25 year old girl (with a decent wage) and would not expect my partner to support me financially...

No, you wouldn't. Because you're thinking about a nice typical relationship with a man roughly your own age...
But fast forward a few years...

You've been left on your own with a couple of kids and you've met a new guy aged 40.

Would you prefer it if he lived with his parents and still went out partying etc?
Or would you prefer it if he had sorted out his career and had a nice house etc?

Life changes. That doesn't mean all women are "gold diggers"...
It means that women expect different things from a man aged 40, than a man aged 20.

Cautious_Optimist

Listerbelle wrote: »

I agree with many of the previous commenters.

There is another saying I like, which is something along the lines of "lead the lives others wont, so you can have the life others can't" which to me means scrimping and saving and being wise with your money early on in life, so that you can do what you want with your life later. ie Stop working in your 40s or 50s. I know this is a long way off, but sometimes life goes by quickly!

That saying could also apply to moving abroad etc to find work.
There are plenty of guys his age driving trucks in the desert, sharing rooms on oil rigs, etc.

This guy still has youth, freedom and flexibility on his side.
But he seems to be aspiring to a life less lived...
It's sad. I would suggest he looks at expanding his social contacts a bit.

Maybe take a trip to the British Legion one evening and speak to some of the old boys there..?
OP doesn't sound cut out for life in the Forces, but he still has time for a more adventurous work life.

Pixie5740

Cautious_Optimist wrote: »

No, you wouldn't. Because you're thinking about a nice typical relationship with a man roughly your own age...
But fast forward a few years...

You've been left on your own with a couple of kids and you've met a new guy aged 40.

Would you prefer it if he lived with his parents and still went out partying etc?
Or would you prefer it if he had sorted out his career and had a nice house etc?

Life changes. That doesn't mean all women are "gold diggers"...
It means that women expect different things from a man aged 40, than a man aged 20.

Are you sure that your user name Cautious_Optimist is accurate?

The reason a woman (or man if that's what floats your boat) wouldn't want to date a 40 year old man still living at home has nothing to do with finances and more to do with the fact that mummy's boys really aren't an attractive prospect. If you were a single parent with 2 children already, why would you want to take on a 3rd child?

Cautious_Optimist

Pixie5740 wrote: »

Are you sure that your user name Cautious_Optimist is accurate?

The reason a woman (or man if that's what floats your boat) wouldn't want to date a 40 year old man still living at home has nothing to do with finances and more to do with the fact that mummy's boys really aren't an attractive prospect. If you were a single parent with 2 children already, why would you want to take on a 3rd child?

That's true. Women in this country do have an aversion to men "still" living with their parents. Like you say, women will often assume it's because the man who needs the assistance, when it could obviously be the other way around.

In many countries, the family does carry on living together. In those countries, leaving your parents to cope alone carries more shame than being considered a "mummy's boy" or "mummy's girl".

Having travelled a bit, I can see that our Western ways are not always the best...

Pixie5740

Cautious_Optimist wrote: »

That's true. Women in this country do have an aversion to men "still" living with their parents. Like you say, women will often assume it's because the man who needs the assistance, when it could obviously be the other way around.

In many countries, the family does carry on living together. In those countries, leaving your parents to cope alone carries more shame than being considered a "mummy's boy" or "mummy's girl".

Having travelled a bit, I can see that our Western ways are not always the best...

I don't know why you don't give up on dating, since British woman are so awful,l and invest in an inflatable girlfriend and a puncture repair kit.