Spent 4 years pretending it's all OK

Igamogam

NoOneAround wrote: »

Just came in to see what other seismic events happened while I was out in the garden Glad at least the ozone whole is mending

x

Its a mad world..........decided to give up on trying to keep on top of events and just rely on OH giving me updates. He is finding it all fascinating....I am beginning to find more fascination in my greenhouse:D

And ladies tennis which I have always until now, found a little tedious!

NoOneAround

I need help with clearing out greenhouse (hopefully DS will oblige when term ends:)) before I can hang out in there again, have some projects in mind to help DS earn some money for his big trip next year

DH likes to keep his updates to himself these days, bit difficult as I think the honeymoon period of being helpful post diagnosis has probably ended:rotfl:

chevalier

NoOneAround wrote: »

Came across this poem today, written I think over 100 years ago.
Struck a chord.

‘Where the Mind is Without Fear’
by R Tagore

Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection:
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is lead forward by thee into ever-widening thought and action–
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.


NOA
x

Hey NOA struck a chord with me too. I am shamelessly nicking it. cheers chev

NoOneAround

Bobarella wrote: »

How lovely NOA. Thanks for posting that.

chevalier wrote: »

Hey NOA struck a chord with me too. I am shamelessly nicking it. cheers chev

Your welcome Bob and Chev:)

At home this week:j and term ends this week :T:T
Just doing admin today, need to rest. Overdid everything last 3 days - in garden on Friday and Saturday pm, then house work yesterday, with help of DS and DD. Clutter consolidated into a couple of rooms (not counting utility and kids room which is/are a law unto itself:eek:) to sort as and when, but the rest of the house looking nice, feels so good. DS also did the grass and jetwashed most of the patio, he earned £35 this weekend:T he's a star. He also got a prize on speech day on Saturday so very proud of him, he has had a lot to deal with this year.
Its a beautiful day outside and am home alone
so am going to have a coffee and some cake for second breakfast;):) sitting on my lovely clean patio, listening to the birds and busy bees - before embarking on the more tedious stuff.

Have a happy Monday everyone
xx
NOA

NoOneAround

An unproductive morning but am not worrying about it too much. at the moment. I have made a couple of appointments that I needed to make, thought about putting washing in, but everything seems too much effort. Have instead been mulling over what I might realistically achieve over the summer. Have not had any more work come through from the second part time job, a shame, but probably for the best.

Have a forty pound credit voucher to spend in BBQ (items returned for parents, I gave them the money so they didn't have to worry about losing/spending the voucher). Will go this week to get some gloss paint and do a little at a time (all woodwork needs doing). I figure that if I do it in small chunks it won't exhaust me as much as whole room painting. Will also take DS to choose a paint colour for his room and do his room with his help.

Have tried looking for holidays but can't make myself commit to flights, keep thinking the money is better off in bank, never know when SE work will dry up and we do have DS's big trip to save up for. Staying in UK is great, but normally I like to walk lots, but at the moment don't have much stamina, The rebel in me is saying throw caution to the winds and just book flights, the universe will provide and all that, then that other inner voice pipes up "what if" :mad::eek::o:(:) all mixed up.

Feel a bit deflated, probably because after such a hectic few weeks its all catching up.

xx
NOA

NoOneAround

A little bit of admin done this am, and a few long overdue emails sorted. Otherwise it there has been a lot of procrastination this morning. Can't seem to get myself going. Possible another day required at school at the end of the week, will know tomorrow.

Need to go to town to do some banking of cheques etc but no energy:( Have tried a few different tasks, but getting nowhere. thinking about going to sleep for an hour or so - unheard of for me, but cant think what else to do?:rotfl: seems to be the most positive step:rotfl:
x

NoOneAround

...and I did:o full of beans and have just given the car a quick wash/hose down. :dance: not sure where that came from - but it was sunny outside - head feels so much clearer now!
x

NoOneAround

Morning
Today is work to a list day and post for accountability . I feel I have wasted this week, and need to snap out of this feeling exhausted thing/phase.
Essentials for today....
1. Car to garage for some work.
2. Go into town for banking.
3. Wash veggie drawers and shelf in fridge - some abandoned veg discovered lurking in the back :eek:
4. Rewash abandoned washed clothes that never found their way out of washing machine a couple of days ago:eek:
Wash more - good drying day esp for handwashing stuff.
5 Find paperwork for dishwasher - and call engineer out - should have done this beginning of the week.
6. Small grocery shop when out to pick up DD from work.

Am struggling a bit with changes in dynamics at home at the moment... all feels a bit strange as DD's boyfriend is staying for a little while, and I'm finding it very hard not to be over critical all the time (the No-one-is-going-to-be-good-enough thing seems to have taken hold in my brain, despite all my best intentions:()
Definitely not what I thought I would be like, and I don't like me for it
NOA
xx

brizzledfw

Sending hugs...you sound like you could do with booking that holiday?

Xx

NoOneAround

Keep humming and ha-ing Brizzle:(
Lots more expenditure -
Another car bill £420:eek:
balance of £350 to pay by next Tuesday for DS school history trip in October
and DD commences her intensive driving course this week with test due in in 11 days which I have paid £600+ in last month (she'll have to pay own insurance). Just need to get her independently mobile.
So lots of extras going/gone out this month.

Term has ended :j so no school runs for over 8 weeks:j but still need to take DD to work and pick up, so hoping she passes quickly.
Its nearly the weekend, going to see parents this weekend, didn't go last weekend as so much going on for end of term.
NOA
xx