Very worried - cheating husband?

Kantankrus_Mare

He sounds like a nasty, selfish , pathetic excuse of a man and although it won't feel like it right this moment, he has done you a huge favour.

You deserve better. Being alone has surely got to be better. Let him go. Mourn what you thought you had and then move on. Easier said than done...I am fully aware.

Look after yourself.

X

triple_choc_chip

Annie75 wrote: »

It then degenerated into a row for about 5 minutes and ended with him saying how much he hates me, he called me a boring nagging b****h and said he is going to divorce me when he gets home. I've tried to contact him since the row but he's not bothered to get back to me.

He has the upper hand and if you keep trying to contact him it re-enforces his position. If he speaks to you there will probably be many more hurtful words because right now in his eyes you are a nuisance because you are irritating him. Most women make this mistake because when they have a problem they want to talk about it but to men they are as irritating as a mosquito.

The best thing (and hardest) is to cease all communication. Don't send any Skype I.M.'S, texts, emails, or make any calls and don't reply to his. Edit your Skype to show as invisible so that he will never know when you are online. Give him the opportunity to miss you and wonder if you have gone forever as that's the only way he will take time to consider if that is what he really wants. Don't underestimate how hard this will be because we're not wired this way.

Men only act at the time of ultimatum whereas women have usually gone past the point of no return by this time so you have to engineer it.

This will give you the space to consider what you really want. If you decide you want the relationship to continue, wait until he returns to the UK and wants to talk because by then he will be serious about resolving the issue. He will also understand by then that you won't put up with crap from him when he is away. It's important that he doesn't know whether or not you will still be there. If he comes home early you will know from that action alone how afraid he is that he has lost you.

If you decide you want to split, start making preparations before he returns, sorting out accommodation, joint accounts etc. but keep it to yourself and work on it quietly.

Good luck

whitewing

Sassy_gnome wrote: »

But was he cheating? That's what we all wanted to know :wall:

That's a bit unkind when someone's marriage is breaking up. It's not just for your entertainment.