Strange undies found!

JIL

If you always wash the duvet and always do the buttons up how would the pants get in there?

When you put the duvet cover back on how do you do that? I turn mine inside out and fold it down from the corners.
Do you buy your own underwear, if yes would you have bought that style?
Has your oh had history of one night stands? Would he go to the pub and end up back at home while you are away with a one night stand?. Thinking about it if the ladies pants were removed in the heat of the moment and she left later its not likely she would routel around the bed looking for them. Instead she would slip into her clothes and leave. He wouldn't know she had left them, why would he?
Plausible explanation.
The pants are yours that you forgot you owned.
What to do?
Go with your instinct, what's that telling you?

xNinax

Could you have accidentally brought them home from your night away? Maybe unpacked your bag on the bed.

It's a rubbish example but my daughter has occasionally come home with someone else's pj top or something after a sleepover.

Tropez

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Surely this thread can't be real?! Such a weird thing to create a thread about.

What exactly are you wanting us to say? If you don't know who's knickers they are then how are we meant to know!

If - and it's a small if - it's true, I can't believe you wouldn't recognise your own pants, even if you hadn't wore them for months? Also, I don't believe a random pair of panties would float around a duvet cover for months on end....so if they're not yours then a, he's having an affair or b, he's a cross dresser.

C) He's got a panty fetish, it is very common.

The WWE (yes, I am ashamed I know this) used to sell the attire worn by their female wrestlers (and such attire is basically glorified lingerie) by auctions and it would attract thousands of bids and go for thousands of dollars. Let's be brutally honest here, most, if not all of that attire, would be coming into contact with a penis sooner or later.

Anatidaephobia

The underwear is your size. The label has been removed the same way that you remove your labels. You have so many pairs that you don't think you could recognise them all. I would say it seems highly likely that they belong to you.

The trust issues between you and your partner are the problem though. I don't know whether he has behaved sufficiently suspiciously to justify your thoughts, I don't know if you're just being paranoid. But either way this is the real problem so, in that respect, it doesn't actually matter whether the underwear belongs to you or not, as the trust issues remain regardless.

rachiibell

Maybe a bit tmi here but if the knickers are black it should be fairly easy to tell if they're clean or have been worn from a quick look inside...

Anatidaephobia

Quizzical_Squirrel wrote: »

I'm still struggling with the idea of the duvet cover not being washed for an absolute minimum of 6 months. There's both a top and bottom sheet under this duvet, right? I'm still stuck on this. The knickers are a long way off.

The OP said in post 34 that she washes the duvet cover regularly. When she said six months, I think she was saying that if they are hers, she definitely hasn't worn them within the last six months, so they would've been kicking about in that duvet for at least six months.

*Louise*

I think if you have so much underwear that you're not sure they are yours, then there is a pretty good chance they are. You say you cut the labels off, it's not that common a thing to do.

I don't think there is ANY chance that they have been caught up in the duvet for a while. 1- you button it up before washing and 2. Something which has caught in a duvet and dried there would be really crushed and wrinkly. You can tell just by looking at a pair of pants if they have been worn or not by just looking at them, a body would have shaped them.


If there aren't any other obvious signs from your OH that are making you concerned (mobile phone glued to his side, etc) then I think you should have another chat, hopefully he will give you some more reassurance (he has already given you his email password) and you can try and move on.

I'm sure you will be very vigilant about any new signs for the next while, I would never advocate someone sticking their head in the sand, but just try not to let it take over your thoughts too much that it ruins the relationship.

stir_crazy

rachiibell wrote: »

Maybe a bit tmi here but if the knickers are black it should be fairly easy to tell if they're clean or have been worn from a quick look inside...

That and the fact that clothing deforms and softens after its been worn. You can tell the difference between something that is clean, even if scrunched up, and something that has been on. I dont understand how the OP couldnt tell if they were clean or not, especially since she tried them on.

Morglin

ButterflyKisses wrote: »

I was just thinking, as a few people have seemed to suggest someone would be unlikely to forget a pair of knickers...if I was planning an overnight stay somewhere, I would take a spare pair for the morning. I don't think I'd necessarily notice if I hadn't picked up the old pair if they weren't in sight.

Also, if your partner had bought them to wear himself or use for other purposes, why would he cut the label out? That just feels like more of a 'female' thing to do to me. Would he fit in a pair of your knickers? That might be a way of ruling that out.

Either way, I'm really sorry OP. Not a nice thing to be worrying about.

Well, if I was staying with a friend, or a bloke openly, overnight, then yeah, I would have spare knickers, although I would still take all undies home with me..

But, if I was nipping into someone's bed for a quick spot of adulterous sex, I would make sure I took all 'evidence' home with me!:eek:

Doesn't sound very likely, and probably belong to OP and they have been caught in a corner of the duvet cover for months.

Lin

lotty41

It's on my mind morning til night!

I'm trying to let this go, I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.

Its a mystery that's never going to be resolved.

I know I have trust issues. I have been cheated on in all my relationships, domestic violence for years. Don't give this info lightly but when you met someone you think is treating you right for once you really don't want to believe that it's all going pear shape.

At the start of our relationship he said he wanted to stop giving this woman and a guy a lift to work because they didn't contribute towards the petrol. Now I didn't even know he was giving these people a lift to work until he mentioned it, I also didn't have a problem with it.
He said he had stopped the lifts, and when I asked a while later if he was def not giving these lifts he said 'No I'm not, why would I lie to you about that'.
Had a row one night and when into his phone, wrong I know. Turns out he was still picking these people up for work, but didn't tell me because he knew I would react.
Didn't really except that excuse because I didn't have a problem with it in the first place.
So now I ask was it a man and a woman!!

We have moved home since and doesn't pick anyone up for work now.

Think this is where my mistrust came from with him.