Better off Financially living apart or as a couple?

Gaz83

That's how it should be.

Those who can work, must work.

Those who can't work, must be taken care of.

mummytohollieandpinkbump

TheWaltons wrote: »

I think you need to get real lady.

My kids see there Dad 2 hours a day MAXIMUM throughout the week.

My DD loves her Daddy to bits and what makes ME swell with pride is when we drive to MY work, she sees her Daddys WORK and says 'Daddys in work Mummy' and waves.

My DD knows her Daddy is working very hard to keep us existing and that we love her very much but we have to go to work, otherwise we'll end up on Benefits pushing the latest Burberry Checked pram sporting the latest Nike Air Max trainers, driving the latest Vauxhall Astra and texting on the latest Mobile phone.

*shudders*

fair enough your daughter is at an age where she understands her daddy need to work my daughter isnt shes only just turned 1 and has no concept of where daddy is and when hes coming back.

oh and i like your last comment. my daughter doesnt have a burberry pram far from it she has a second hand one and a 320 buggy,i dont wear nike trainers or have a car and my phone is a really old model. i like your opinion of me though just because of my age.makes me laugh.

wifeforlife

mummytohollieandpinkbump wrote: »

erm i think i can pull put the depression card. wny oh why i have to explain myself i dont know but here goes.

ever since primary school i was bullied moved to secondary school was even worse. i was so depressed i tried to kill myself i was made to feel like i was worth nothing.

when i left my depression lifted i made new friends and got a job and became independant but at my second job. i was discriminated agaibst becasue of my age and in the end left i had no money,no friends and no life and depression came back. i spent all my time in bed wishing i was dead. oh and btw through this depression i never claimed one single benefit. i eventually got a new job and slowly my old self came back.

so yes i ahve been through dsepression and now and again it comes back mainly thansk to my school days as i still feel ilke i'm worth nothing even more so right now when people like you feel its ok to have a go.

i also admire single mums for the way they get on with it and not complain my mum was a single mum and she worked to give us the best life possible i am very thankful i have a loving partner.

i can see th eother side of the coin but chosse to ignore it since everyone is being so horrible to me.

I didnt ask for you to explain yourself, but thank you for doing so. I would also like to say I'm not having a go at you.

I would support you 100% and help and advise you if you wanted it, the fact is you dont want it. You dont want to help yourself therefore nobody else wants to help.

Your choosing to ignore the other side of the coin not because people are being nasty, your choosing to ignore it because you have no valid reasons to defend your actions.

I would suggest not getting too angry or upset over these threads, remember your bump, but I would suggest taking 5 minutes in the depression thread and getting support, also the student support thread where you can get info on part time courses for you now or try www.open.ac.uk, I can highly recommend it. I've found the alot of support in these threads and I dont deliberately pick through peoples threads and reply, but I take great offence at the original poster and yourself.

Cate

TheWaltons_3

mummytohollieandpinkbump wrote: »

fair enough your daughter is at an age where she understands her daddy need to work my daughter isnt shes only just turned 1 and has no concept of where daddy is and when hes coming back.

oh and i like your last comment. my daughter doesnt have a burberry pram far from it she has a second hand one and a 320 buggy,i dont wear nike trainers or have a car and my phone is a really old model. i like your opinion of me though just because of my age.makes me laugh.

My daughter is perhaps 10/11 months older than yours and I have worked since she was 6 months. Her Daddy not being around doesn't bother he, as she gets plenty of love when he is around.

I don't know how old you are at all, and I couldn't care less what make and model your Pram is. It was a sad but true generalisation.

I am 23 myself.

Anthillmob

Anthillmob wrote: »

hillie and bumps mum. you havent answered one question ive put to you. are you therefore bullshoitting us?

ill ask again.

milkydrink

mummytohollieandpinkbump wrote: »

he isnt tired anymore he has only just started working weekends and it isnt 2 days its 3 and they are 12 hour shift 30 miles away from where we live.

read through all of my posts first as you'll see i have already written this

My husband gets up at 4am & gets home about 6pm, FIVE days per week - Mon - Fri. This week he has NOT had a day off & has worked Saturday & Sunday too.
He too works 30 miles from where we live........

I get up at 6.30am & get home about 6.15pm, but I only work 4 days per week.

Anthillmob

mummytohollieandpinkbump wrote: »

fair enough your daughter is at an age where she understands her daddy need to work my daughter isnt shes only just turned 1 and has no concept of where daddy is and when hes coming back.

dont make me laugh. even below the age of 1 they understand perfectly well when daddy or mummy leave the house and when they come back, thats what all that inane grinning and gurgling is about on their return.

are you seriously saying you wont work because your daughter has no concept of daddy going to work? :rotfl:

mummytohollieandpinkbump

rachnbri wrote: »

Originally Posted by mummytohollieandpinkbump
really so is that why me and my partner were living seperate lives when he worked during the week leaving the house at dinner and getting back at 11pm. we would have no quality family time as he would spend most of his time catching up on his sleep in the mornings and at weekends as his job is very hard and tiring (i used to work with him btw so know exactly how hard).

is that also why i became depressed because i felt we werent a family i felt like i was a single mum.

now that he is working weekends we have more time to spend as a family.


I can't help but wonder how hollie and bumps mummy is going to cope with the 12 hour night shifts she may have to work as a midwife as she seems to have a very strange idea of what a 'normal' working week actually means?

i do know what a normal working week is thanks. and i am quite capable of working a 12 hgour night shift when i become a midwife. i have worked 12 hour shifts in the past i can do it again. i am very much a hard worker and i intend to be one of the best midwifes around especially since the nhs has lack of those recently.i hope to one day have my own birthing centre and or fertility clinic too. if thats not ambition and wanting to be hardworking then i dont know what is.

Anthillmob

well get off your backside andstart learning now instead of putting it off until the kids are old enough to understand the concept of work.

Graham_Devon

Theres a difference between ambition and actually doing it.

Theres 2 of you at home during the week. Given that your husband works at the weekend, there is absolutely nothing at all stopping you train now. Nothing, nada, didly squat.

You two seem to have changed your story since you started posting!