Nice People 12: Nice in Nice

LydiaJ

Masomnia wrote: »

A few people have mentioned it so I will confirm that the portfolio is done! Handed in.

Yay! Well done Masomnia.

GDB2222 wrote: »

... about the different organs boys and girls have...

I remember explaining to one of my kids (can't remember which) that even though they knew the correct anatomical word for one of the fews parts of our predominantly black dog that was white, it probably wasn't a good idea to include it in a description of him to strangers.

lostinrates

GDB2222 wrote: »

I agree wholeheartedly. We were quite open about pubic hair with the children at quite a young age. After all, it is hardly different from the hair that grows under your armpits when you get older. Also, about the different organs boys and girls have. However, I would not have gone into any details about sex when the children were young. When they reach puberty, they need to know, but really not before then, if at all possible.

I think some girls are approaching puberty surprisingly early with the 'obesity epidemic'. Weight can be a trigger for onset of puberty / periods.

Lots of non urban kids know about sex practically, but they also seem less obsessed with it for them selves. Have to admit, until i got going I really wasn't bothered at all, even though I knew what it was all about. Missed the 'innocent' dating phase out entirely.

Otoh I think the idea of 'sexuality' more than love/romance pervades fashion, and music and culture more now than even a decade or two a go. I think young children subconsciously , unless consciously 'protected' from things like tv , music culture etc are more knowing in someways yet strangely potentially more innocent in others. Not many get the same liberties and freedom to test boundaries......precisely because that feeling of the dangers and all that I think we kind of know even if we don't want to accept is different in today's world ( where good change has come but with acceptance floodgates opened and acceptance became flooding exposure) And its there, everywhere. Its barely possible to say something without double entendre. Young market pop is not about puppy love. Everything is meant to indicate a predilection of some sort.

Shrug.

Some Americans often disassociate the word !!!!!! with sodamy. I think there is more of a correlation with something bugging them. Its not a common usage word. I am fond of the word and buggxration, and used to disabuse them of this confusion quick smart. Barely meet new people these days, so not an issue.

Nikkster

silvercar wrote: »

Given they know what they have clearly found out, you need to tell them that everyone who says it, doesn't actually mean that. Or there is the risk that someone hits their finger with a hammer and they think that there is some sort of sex going on.

I would want to know who told them that, but more importantly tell them that most people who use the word use it as an expletive and that it is a rude word in general.

As I read it, they were aware of (and using?) the word, but completely unaware of its alternative usage. Gen was wondering whether he should enlighten them as to this.

In my experience, I've very rarely heard it used as a description of sexual activity (even when it could have been). I do often hear it used as a general-purpose expletive. I'd discourage use in the same way I'd generally discourage swearing (do as I say not as I do...), but not go into the origins of the word. Have you explained the alternative usage of f***?

Generali

So consensus seems to be, I shouldn't have said it. Oh well, too late now.

Mrs Generali was genuinely shocked. Not angry or upset but shocked at what I said. The Generalissimos reaction? Eeeeeeeew. Hopefully they won't say it again which is the desired reaction.

I'd kinda rather that the kids knew that 'bad words' actually mean something. That if they call someone a whatever then they are comparing them with a part of the body or a sexual act or something. I heard the words as a kid and didn't understand them which meant there really was no difference between bloody and some of the 'sexual swearwords' (as they used to say on the cinema ads for ratings). My feeling is that if they understand what the word means it takes away some of the fascination. The Boy is particularly getting to the age when he and his mates will be starting to use those sorts of words.

Doozergirl

lostinrates wrote: »

Linked from another thread.

http://www.trinity.edu/jdunn/spiderdrugs.htm

( page about how they react is funny)

Wow. I don't know what Chloral Hydrat is, but I'll make a note to avoid it.

Generali

Nikkster wrote: »

As I read it, they were aware of (and using?) the word, but completely unaware of its alternative usage. Gen was wondering whether he should enlighten them as to this.

In my experience, I've very rarely heard it used as a description of sexual activity (even when it could have been). I do often hear it used as a general-purpose expletive. I'd discourage use in the same way I'd generally discourage swearing (do as I say not as I do...), but not go into the origins of the word. Have you explained the alternative usage of f***?

Yes, they know what f... means or at least The Boy does. I think it was the childish explanation that I gave that freaked Mrs Generali out.

LydiaJ

Generali wrote: »

So consensus seems to be, I shouldn't have said it. Oh well, too late now.

I'm sure you haven't done them any harm.

Nikkster

Generali wrote: »

My feeling is that if they understand what the word means it takes away some of the fascination. The Boy is particularly getting to the age when he and his mates will be starting to use those sorts of words.

Understand and agree with the intention. Not sure how pleased I'd be if I was a parent dealing with 'The Boy says !!!!!! means x... what does that mean?' or 'why did you say that, it means x' when I swear as I stub my toe etc.

lostinrates

Generali wrote: »

So consensus seems to be, I shouldn't have said it. Oh well, too late now.

Mrs Generali was genuinely shocked. Not angry or upset but shocked at what I said. The Generalissimos reaction? Eeeeeeeew. Hopefully they won't say it again which is the desired reaction.

I'd kinda rather that the kids knew that 'bad words' actually mean something. That if they call someone a whatever then they are comparing them with a part of the body or a sexual act or something. I heard the words as a kid and didn't understand them which meant there really was no difference between bloody and some of the 'sexual swearwords' (as they used to say on the cinema ads for ratings). My feeling is that if they understand what the word means it takes away some of the fascination. The Boy is particularly getting to the age when he and his mates will be starting to use those sorts of words.

Hang on every one has said they wouldn't have done. Not what you should have with YOUR kids who you know best.

I said I wouldn't have broached it unless they asked me first.

So :

Lir: don't use that word please, can you think of an alternative?

Kid: no I like that one

Lir: that one doesn't washi'm afraid, not appropriate, pick another , I'll help. How about......egads?

Kid: no, bxxxx. Why not, what does it mean , why cannot I use it?

......

Then you are in a position where you IMO, should impart knowledge in age appropriate way. That depends on your family and child.

Generali

GDB2222 wrote: »

Happy Fathers Day, Gen.

Nikkster wrote: »

Happy Fathers Day, Gen

Thanks both, I really like Fathers Day.

When I was a kid we weren't allowed to do Fathers Day which I didn't like but my Dad wouldn't have a bar of it. The Generalissimos love making a fuss of me, bringing me a present (I got a mug, a bottle opener, an multi-tool and a tape-measure/spirit level/pen/post-it note), breakfast in bed (partial English) and a cuppa.

I got loads of hugs and kisses too.