Why do people choose to get married?

Georgiegirl256

It seems to me that those who are happily unmarried don't feel the need to judge those that are married, but some of those that are married do feel the need to judge those that aren't, even if those that aren't are totally happy and content as they are.

From some of the comments I've read on here, some people appear to think they are superior and that their relationships mean more than the 'great unmarried'.

I just wish that people would respect other people's views, and believe people when they say they are happy without being married.

Gloomendoom

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

It seems to me that those who are happily unmarried don't feel the need to judge those that are married, but some of those that are married do feel the need to judge those that aren't, even if those that aren't are totally happy and content as they are.

From some of the comments I've read on here, some people appear to think they are superior and that their relationships mean more than the 'great unmarried'.

I just wish that people would respect other people's views, and believe people when they say they are happy without being married.

I thought it was the other way round. I agree with your sentiment though... live and let live.

Georgiegirl256

Gloomendoom wrote: »

I thought it was the other way round. I agree with your sentiment though... live and let live.

The other way round? Maybe?!

My friends for example, they've been together over 20 years and have got one of the strongest most committed relationships I know, but according to some people who have strong views on marriage, their relationship isn't serious and apparently they're keeping their options open!

It's strange, rightly or wrongly, I think a lot of people do treat you with a new respect once you've got married.

Lily-Rose_3

Lovelyjoolz wrote: »

What has romance got to do with it??? You sound foolish. I think this is the reason so many marriages fail today. They over romanticise it and then become bitterly disappointed when it doesn't work out like it does in the movies.

Marriage is a legal state, a business transaction to protect both parties. Having a marriage certificate gives you certain rights but it doesn't guarantee you a fairytale ending.

I'm not saying there shouldn't be love. There should be. Heaps and heaps of love. But love and romance are too entirely different things. Romance is ... him not leaving his underpants on the bathroom floor. Love is ... you not battering him around the head with a frying pan when he consistently does so.

'What has ROMANCE got to do with marriage?' Are you kidding me?! What a daft thing to say and what an unpleasant person you sound. Because I don't think that getting married for financial gain sounds romantic, (and it doesn't!) you feel the need to personally insult me. Who the hell do you think you are?

What a rude, arrogant and judgemental person you sound. And you lost the argument, by insulting me for NO reason.

Maybe you are projecting? Will your partner not marry you? (I suppose you will tell me now that you ARE married.)

It seems to me that women who poo-poo marriage so readily, and are incredibly b1tchy to women who ARE married, have men that will not marry them. They attack marriage and also women who ARE married, to make themselves feel better about the fact that their man will not marry them.

I (and some other married women I know,) have experienced a few women in real life who are unmarried, and they're incredibly catty about marriage and married women. What it boils down to is that many of them are incredibly jealous.

I have yet to see a married woman be so spiteful to an unmarried woman. Yet unmarried women are often so spiteful to married women. Smacks of jealousy to me.

[Deleted User]

I got married because I thought I could trust him with my love and my family. How stupid was I! I'll never be that gullible again so I will be single until I die.

Georgiegirl256

Lily-Rose wrote: »

'What has ROMANCE got to do with marriage?' Are you kidding me?! What a daft thing to say and what an unpleasant person you sound. Because I don't think that getting married for financial gain sounds romantic, (and it doesn't!) you feel the need to personally insult me. Who the hell do you think you are?

What a rude, arrogant and judgemental person you sound. And you lost the argument, by insulting me for NO reason.

Maybe you are projecting? Will your partner not marry you? (I suppose you will tell me now that you ARE married.)

It seems to me that women who poo-poo marriage so readily, and are incredibly b1tchy to women who ARE married, have men that will not marry them. They attack marriage and also women who ARE married, to make themselves feel better about the fact that their man will not marry them.

I (and some other married women I know,) have experienced a few women in real life who are unmarried, and they incredibly catty about marriage and married women. What it boils down to is that many of them are incredibly jealous.

I have yet to see a married woman be so spiteful to an unmarried woman. Yet unmarried women are often so spiteful to married women. Smacks of jealousy to me.

Wow!! Calm down! There's no need to be so harsh just because someone doesn't agree with you. That's the thing with these forums (and all forums I guess?), people have strong views and will always disagree. What happened to live and let live and respecting other people's views?

Your last paragraph btw, I see it the completely opposite way to how you do (see my above comment) and don't understand why people can't accept it when a person says that they are happily unmarried. Although I do agree that in some cases, jealousy can come into it.

Lily-Rose_3

Georgiegirl256 wrote: »

Wow!! Calm down! There's no need to be so harsh just because someone doesn't agree with you. That's the thing with these forums (and all forums I guess?), people have strong views and will always disagree. What happened to live and let live and respecting other people's views?

Your last paragraph btw, I see it the completely opposite way to how you do (see my above comment) and don't understand why people can't accept it when a person says that they are happily unmarried. Although I do agree that in some cases, jealousy can come into it.

So.... I hope you are going to have a go at 'lovely jools' too, for calling me a fool!

If you don't, that will make you a disingenuous hypocrite.

By the way, I am not saying that all unmarrieds are jealous of marrieds; not at all. Only the ones who are spiteful and b1tchy.

I shall look forward to you having a go at 'lovelyjools' too.

I have a feeling I shall be waiting a long time..........................................................

Georgiegirl256

Lily-Rose wrote: »

So.... I hope you are going to have a go at 'lovely jools' too, for calling me a fool!

If you don't, that will make you a disingenuous hypocrite.

By the way, I am not saying that all unmarrieds are jealous of marrieds; not at all. Only the ones who are spiteful and b1tchy.

I shall look forward to you having a go at 'lovelyjools' too.

I have a feeling I shall be waiting a long time..........................................................

I won't be "having a go" at her as you call it, but I agree, there was no need to call you foolish. I can however totally see where she is coming from and what she means though.

Turtle

I agree that some married people look down on those that are unmarried. I sometimes encountered the view that their relationship was more serious than mine even though they'd only been together a fraction of the time.

We got married after 17.5 yrs. My OH was petrified of getting married infront of other people, we went abroad with just our parents. We finally decided to do it due to a very close friend of mine being diagnosed with terminal cancer and realising that we'd have no say in the others treatment if it was one of us.

We both love being married though, I love the fact that we've got the same name now and he said very quickly after the wedding that he felt bare without his wedding ring.

Gloomendoom

Lovelyjoolz wrote: »

Marriage is a legal state, a business transaction to protect both parties. Having a marriage certificate gives you certain rights but it doesn't guarantee you a fairytale ending.

Marriage can be more than a just a legal state. In fact, it is possible to be married in the eyes of your god and cultural peers without the marriage being legally formalised.

My sister-in-law was married for over a year before she had the civil ceremony.