Daughter being victimised at school

dktreesea

OP, I have been through a similar scenario quite a few years ago now, and my DD, who has long since left school still refers to it now and then. For sure this isn't trivial. Don't be persuaded to treat it as such.

I would go to the school, say you are not prepared to have your daughter bullied, under any circumstances, and say you want her to change out of her current class and into the one where her close friends are.

My impression of the scenario that developed at my DD's primary school - albeit during a different generation to your DD - was that girls were expected to be loyal to their own classmates ahead of children in other classes, even if they had private friendships with those other children, e.g. close neighbours, outside of school.

Of course, if your DD is not prepared to change classes - and she may not be - that's a different matter. If the school won't cooperate, I suggest you escalate it first to the council, and if they are not helpful, to the board of education for your area. (Not sure if this is the same in England as it is up in Scotland). Schools have a duty of care to protect children from bullying, including your daughter, who is certainly within her rights to choose whom she wants to play with. My DD had friends who couldn't stand each other. She never played with both groups at the same time.

balletshoes

adding something else here - if you're in scotland, you have less than 2 weeks left of the school year, in england less than 5 weeks left. In my opinion, with such a small amount of time left in class for the year, I'd leave it alone, as it stands OP.

Of course if it escalates, I'd be on to the school straightaway.

justme111

And this thread shows that girls that behave in a nasty tetchy drama gueen manner grow up in.women who behave the same . Come on , we all can be like that, some more some less.
Omg how over the top - involving united nations in dealing with a girl's squabble would be next step
Op , I remember how important it was to me when I was a girl so I understand you feeling your daughter 's stress. I think you should keep calm abovr all , its your work to show by example to your daughter that it can be dealt with and learn to put things in the perspective. I am a single mother as well so I understand closeness of a team , I think in this instance it is detrimental though as it reduces you to children's level instead of your daughter having reassurance of an adult in you.

Spendless

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

Oh well I apologise if anyone thought I meant all girls, although I thought it obvious that I did not. Must try to word it better next time.

I've got an 11 yo dd, sdw you didn't upset me. She's definitely a drama queen and can be catty - not always. Your post made me smile as I have both girl and boy, the latter would often have physical scrapes with other boys until he grew older. I was going to quote you and say I have the [STRIKE]worst[/STRIKE] best of all worlds.:D

seven-day-weekend

Spendless wrote: »

I've got an 11 yo dd, sdw you didn't upset me. She's definitely a drama queen and can be catty - not always. Your post made me smile as I have both girl and boy, the latter would often have physical scrapes with other boys until he grew older. I was going to quote you and say I have the [STRIKE]worst[/STRIKE] best of all worlds.:D

Thank you, I thought it was obvious what I meant and I'm glad to see that not everyone is so touchy.

I have one boy and he and his friends were always so straightforward to deal with....none of the snide remarks and flouncing that you SOMETIMES (note folks I said sometimes) get with girls

Brighton_belle

seven-day-weekend wrote: »

I don't believe I said 'I'm glad I don't have a girl BECAUSE they are catty..etc'. I used two separate unlinked sentences.

I confess I was shocked too 7dw - there was only a comma, making it all one sentence, not two separate sentences.
Don't worry - I am not traumatised, no need to apologise! I'm just explaining it did read bad and I couldn't understand what would make you think that, when you' been a girl yourself.
Clearly it's not what you meant to say, because you have now explained otherwise.