please help 16 and pregnant

NYM

Mojisola wrote: »

I took it to be the OP's BF who had advised returning the nappies.

...darn it ! I should read more thoroughly shouldn't I..

I get confused with all the synonyms - that's why I chose my 'user-name' :rotfl:

evenasus

Marshmallow82 wrote: »

16 year olds getting pregnant for council houses seems to be a common thing now

Then it's about time it stopped.
If the Conservatives did this, I'm sure it would gain them voters.

BillJones

evenasus wrote: »

Then it's about time it stopped.
If the Conservatives did this, I'm sure it would gain them voters.

If the mothers do not have the means to support them, then the state should give them to families who can.

Having a child at sixteen, unmarried, and without a proper income is simply criminal.

nannytone_2

BillJones wrote: »

If the mothers do not have the means to support them, then the state should give them to families who can.

Having a child at sixteen, unmarried, and without a proper income is simply criminal.

this is 2014 not 1814!
an awful lot of young mothers raise children, whilst working and prosuce choldren who also work hard and achieve!
personally, i think they should remove the children from judgemental bigots and give them to 'decent; families

mattcanary

Poppie68 wrote: »

OP you need to be totally proactive here. You need to be clever and sneaky and try to persude her to allow you to accompany her to the midwife appointments. Make the visits to the midwife a girly day out, after the appointment tell her you can do lunch together or go and do a little baby shopping. While you are together don't slag her BF or his father off, don't fire questions off at her just sit over lunch or a coffee and calmly slip questions into normal conversations. You could also behind the scenes look into any local mother and baby units as i think your daughter will benefit from moving into one she will get a case worker and the support a young mum needs. Maybe discuss the option gently and make it sound attractive, you will both be able to speak to the midwife about this and she will be able to help with getting your daughter into the unit. You really do need to tread carefully as it sounds like she has been brainwashed to a certain degree by the BF and his dad. They are making living with them seem attractive but in reality (and she obviously can't see it yet) it is a reciepe for disaster.

What!!!
Living in a baby and mother unit is better than living with the OP?
Or with the OP daughter's boyfriend?


How do we know that OP's daughter is any more responsible than her boyfriend?
That's right - just assume that it is always the male that is irresponsible....

mattcanary

whodathunkit wrote: »

If the child was going to be born and brought up in that sort of situation it might well be best for it to be fostered and then adopted.

Of course, it wouldn't be best.


OP obviously cares about her daughter.
Would she wan to see her daughter being forced to give her baby away for adoption to some strangers?
Rather than perhaps applying to become granddaughters primary carer herself (if the worst did come to the worst)?




Darn it - looks like thw whole thread has been a hoax!

Poppie68

mattcanary wrote: »

What!!!
Living in a baby and mother unit is better than living with the OP?
Or with the OP daughter's boyfriend?


How do we know that OP's daughter is any more responsible than her boyfriend?
That's right - just assume that it is always the male that is irresponsible....

Whats wrong with a 16 year old going into a mother and baby unit? They get practical help with learning to care for the baby, have a support worker and 24 hour help!
The daughter seems to have a problem with her mother, past history is playing a huge part in that (abuse).
Ermmmmm - not assuming anything...if you had read the thread properly, according to mum... there has been drug raids at the property the son lives at and he has a charge of arson against him....yep great role model and sounds like a lovely warm homely place for a baby to be brought up in and by the daddy who seems like a pillar of the community.
Sounds to me that the mother and baby unit is the safest place for the baby!


Thats assuming the story is true....but then again if it is just a figment of someones overactive imagination the above is still the best option for someone in the same situation...

Poppie68

16 year olds getting pregnant to gain a council house!!!! Those days are long gone, the only single mums that qualify for a council house are the ones that don't have family to house them and have'nt had a 'home' for a long period of time due to a break down in family relationships. A council house is a chance for these young mums to finally have a home, being young, single with a baby/child living in a council house or on benefits does'nt make them 2nd class citizens or scroungers. It's what they do with the rest of their lives that will define their standing in this world. Plenty of young mums turn into hardworking excellant parents.

redmalc

Poppie i do not know where you live but i can assure you 16 year olds do get council houses or if not available some alternative housing paid for by the hard working sector if pregnant

BillJones

nannytone wrote: »

personally, i think they should remove the children from judgemental bigots and give them to 'decent; families

The sad thing is that you probably do believe this.