Get lost debt

parsniphead

It's very odd but since my self imposed internet sabbatical I have really broken the habit, often logging on and straight off again.

It's been a while so I thought I may use the diary to help me continue with the plans and organisation. I hopefully have some changes on the way which will mean to I have to get organised once and for all.

Firstly I have started job hunting. Where I work has gone completely t1ts up and I really don't think I want to work there any longer. I will happily go the extra mile for a good employer but I will not be used and expected to do an extra full time role on top of my current one. I do have a life. Oh and this is with no extra pay. I'm not the only one feeling like this and so far within two weeks five people have handed in their notice. I have a job which I'm going to apply for this morning which is five days compared to my three but only 3 more hours a week. I do long days.

Secondly the house needs sorting asap. I now have Mondays and Fridays while DS is at school so want to use them wisely. Weekends will be for us.

Finally I want this darn debt gone, gone, gone. It won't be this year but by the end of next I want to be hitting the mortgage. One debt will be paid off by the end of November though.:ji can't wait for that final payment.jjj

Today I need to complete the application and spend the rest of the time cleaning and clearing. I'm aiming for at least three bin bags to rubbish, charity etc. But before that I need to check no payments are outstanding.

X

sassychick2014

Morning

Such a shame about the job. I don't blame you for wanting to go elsewhere. We only have one life and so we need to have the right work/home balance and actually enjoy ourselves. Good luck with the application.

Have a great day hon Xx

parsniphead

Thank you sassychick. It's true, we do only have one life.

I've been a little up and down lately. So much going on with work, things to do at home, debts, keeping my head above water and my little ones issues I have not been coping well. I have been talking to DH (I'm not one for airing my true feelings) and he thinks I have depression. He keeps badgering me to visit the doctors but to be honest I wouldn't know what to say or where to begin. Ive decided I need to take some time to get sorted. I can't face work at the moment. I work with young people with ASD, special needs and also behavioural problems and just spend my day thinking which one will my little boy be. I think the world of my students but life is hard enough and my heart breaks at the thought of my little one having to deal with even more.

I also need to get sorted ,get some things in order so I can focus on the little one and give him every bit of help he needs.

Today is cleaning and tidying. I CANNOT live like this anymore. It's really getting me down and not helping with the focus, or lack of. This afternoon is another look at the budgets. They need to be tough but realistic. I need a plan of where I'm going and when I will get there.

I was reading a thread earlier by going-nowhere-fast and she said

Some times i think if you want something enough you can make it happen and other days it feels like im on a hamster wheel and not getting anywhere.

I feel like this a lot, I guess most of us do from time to time. But I also feel that the first half of the quote is completely true. Finding a way that fits is the key.

Sorry for the many thread but getting off my chest feels better. No doubt tomorrow I will have bounced the opposite way and be completely hyper.

Keep going everyone. WE CAN ACHIEVE OUR DREAMS.:)

in_need_of_direction

But hopefully not the ones with the giant hairy spider!

parsniphead

:rotfl:
Been chasing big, hairy siders around all week. DH is terrified of them.

I seem to only dream about work which is horrible when I've been there all day.

in_need_of_direction

I've been having the most random dreams recently. It's so weird though I generally don't dream about work. I waken and fret instead. Have gone back to writing worries down in a bedside notebook. It may be a placebo effect but I do get back to sleep more easily when I do that.

sassychick2014

Hey hon

Hope you're feeling a bit more confident/happier today. I agree with your OH. You should get to the docs and see what they say. I know you don't know what you would say to them but they should be trained to be able to spot this.

Good luck xx

parsniphead

Thanks sassychick. Docs tomorrow. Feeling very nervous.

DH was ordering takeaway tonight. I said I wanted something then realised I wasn't actually hungry. Money saved and no extra unnecessary calories. I'm getting fatter by the minute.

I need to start focussing tomorrow on what I want and where I need to be. But now much needed sleep.......hopefully.

Chrysalis1976

Hi my lovely, it's hard going working in your job (I've worked in the same sort of environment) together with everything else that is going on so if you can't sound off here then and chat to your hubby then where can you x

Hope the doctors went well today, let us know how you got on.

C x

parsniphead

Hi chrysalis. Nice to hear from you.

Docs was rubbish. He has the empathy of the T1000 in Terminator. After almost begging he signed me off for another week. I really think I need to try and change surgeries as its impossible to get to see the other doctor.

Tomorrow I'm going to continue with finance planning. I want everything planned until the end of 2016. Plus it will get rid of more clutter. The never ending clutter.:eek:

I think a nice bath is calling.