a fool in love

4given

Deleted for personal reasons

Mojisola

4given wrote: »

I have started to feel so guilty and have tried to end it but without success.

i just want to have a clean slate:(

Then stop seeing him. No-one is forcing you to carry on meeting him.

Snakey

What's the "I've tried to end it but without success" all about? It takes two people to start a relationship but it only ever needs one to end it. Presumably he isn't raping you or keeping you tied up in his cellar, and what you mean is that you always let him talk you round. In that case you need to put the responsibility onto him not to try to do that. The easiest way to do this is to threaten to tell his wife if he ever comes near you again. What's he going to do? You no longer work together, and you hold his marriage in your hands.

And then you must do whatever's necessary right away, such as deleting/blocking his number and his e-mail address, closing down any separate e-mail account that you use (change your password to something random that you won't remember), and not visiting any usual meeting places that you might have had. And then go and join a gym, or start training for a marathon, or volunteering, or go on holiday, or absolutely anything that will change your routine and fill in your spare time until you feel differently.

If all else fails, tell the poor woman. You can bet the scales will fall from your eyes - and his - in an instant once she knows about it and the chances are that neither of you will have the slightest interest in carrying it on after that.

alias*alibi

4given wrote: »

Hi everyone, pls help i started an with a married man.We were work colleagues (not anymore) when the affair started (i know its wrong)but he seemed like a breath of fresh air.We have been seeing each other for over a year.I'm not expecting the relationship to develop into anything it was basically just having fun and also he has children so i would never want him to leave.I don't know anything about his wife i have never asked and i don't really want to know.I have started to feel so guilty and have tried to end it but without success.I honestly am sorry to the wife and want to end it but it seems i'm a weak.I know people will judge me and i deserve it, i just want to have a clean slate:(

Have a bit of decency and stop it right now before you end up pregnant and cause a whole load of grief for everybody involved.

mountainofdebt

What you're saying is both of you are just using each other for sex. I'm sure his wife, if she ever found out,wouldn't see it like that

Seriously have a lot more self respect and end it.

ska_lover

4given wrote: »

I have started to feel so guilty and have tried to end it but without success.I honestly am sorry to the wife and want to end it but it seems i'm a weak.I know people will judge me and i deserve it, i just want to have a clean slate:(

You act like you are the victim - but you are the complete opposite.:mad:

Person_one

You can't have a clean slate, sorry, you've done something that's very wrong.

What you can do is put a stop to it right now, don't pretend you can't when the truth is you don't want to.

fishybusiness

It's not often there are any winners in situations like this.

You say you don't expect it to go anywhere, and I'm sure it did seem like fun, in the beginning. Actually it is isn't it, if it wasn't us humans wouldn't do it!

So, if it is not going anywhere, and you have started to think about his family....why? Why now, is it not as much fun now, are you bored, is he wanting more, or less, what has changed?

You can't have a clean slate, not after a year of ahem.....being involved in someone's life. If you end it, there may be comeback later, his relationship may break up, and he could come to you, or his wife may come to you to confront you, it just goes on and on doesn't it.

What do you want from the forum?

If you want a clear conscience, and clean slate, let it go, move on, find a partner that is single, and keep your fingers and toes crossed .

Simple.

pink_princess

I think that only half of your thread title is true

4given

Thanks u all

4given

pink_princess wrote: »

I think that only half of your thread title is true

I know it should only be" a fool," i never set out for this it just happened. I tried to end it at first but obviously he talked me round.I have suddenly started to feel guilty and want to do the right thing.