Controlling MIL

maman

Sorry, have only skim read the thread, but unless having the dogs would make you really ill (allergy etc) then I'd put up with them in a cage. My DD brought her dog at Christmas and expected me to tolerate it leaping around the kitchen while I was cooking and sitting in the dining room wile we were eating. I put it out in the conservatory. She wasn't happy but my home, my rules.


As for the old fashioned comments I'd just make sympathetic noises and then do your own thing. If your BF wants to enlighten her that he actually cooks :eek:then that's up to him.

jpwhittle

Cottage_Economy wrote: »

When I came back from honeymoon my MIL gave me a full list of every family and friend on my husband's side with their birthdays and anniversaries.

Apparently as we were now married I would be needing it.

I thanked her and told her I would pass it on to hubby. She looked puzzled and said that, no, it was for me as I would be dealing with all the correspondence from now on as I was his wife.

I stared back at her and said no, I work full time, run a business, and do the majority of the household and garden tasks. i was not taking on any more. He was a grown man and could do it himself, as he had been for the two years I'd known him.

She was shocked.

Over the years I've seen that puzzled, shocked look as she's watched me paint and wallpaper, cut firewood, change the pump and filter in our washing machine, leave hubby to buy friend's and family's birthday and christmas presents, and *gasp* refuse to have a hostess trolley foisted on me because now I was married I would need one to entertain.

However, she took it on the chin when my husband told her we had decided not to have children, and has never made it an issue. For that I forgive her all her funny little 1950s ways

Hahahaha my MIL did this to, and I am expected to make sure ii keep areast of things 10 years later. While we were n honeymoon my MIL opened all my wedding cards and banked the money, I was fuming still am to this day. My in laws are a nightmare, they ring up to see that I bathed the kids, told me how to dress them to a party, make sure I brush my daughters hair, and to make sure I got the kids to do their homework, as well as many other things, relations are very strained and my husband is the type that tells me just to ignore it rather than have y back:mad:

Primrose

My in-laws holidayed in our flat while we were on honeymoon and unwrapped our presents and detached the gift cards so when we returned I had absolutely no idea who had gifted what so writing thank you letters was an inventive nightmare. Maybe they thought they were being helpful but I was really mad. I wasn't bought up to take liberties like that, even with other members of the family.

NoAngel

Wow, I feel incredibly lucky to have my MIL after reading some of these posts! She's not perfect but neither am I. I wish she'd taught her son how to do more housework and cooking though!

geri1965_2

maman wrote: »

Sorry, have only skim read the thread, but unless having the dogs would make you really ill (allergy etc) then I'd put up with them in a cage.

But even in a cage they are likely to stress out the OP's cat.

I would not allow any dogs in my house, full stop.

AnnieO1234

Wow I'm currently at loggerheads with my MIL, at least I don't feel quite so alone with it now! Hugz xxx

just-jilly

This will be an unpopular post, but hey ho i am going to say it.

My daughter in law has been raised very differently to me and her standards are much lower. Her house is very untidy and dirty, which imo is gross. Nothing has a place and as a consequence they can never find anything and when they do it is usually broken/crushed/ruined as it has been squashed under things. Clothes not ironed/torn. It drives me crazy.

If they were on their own i don't think it would be so bad, as i would think your life if you want to be dirty !!!!!!s and have to constantly replace things then crack on, but they have a child, my grand daughter and i do not want her thinking this is normal. I want her to have pride in her appearance and to value what possessions she has. Hopefully some of our standards will rub off on her.

Luckily we rub along nicely and we are quite close. It doesn't stop me wanting her to raise her game a bit though, for my grand daughters sake

wannabe_credit_free

Personally, I would rather baby sit the poodles than the kids....,:D

Tenyearstogo

just-jilly wrote: »

This will be an unpopular post, but hey ho i am going to say it.

My daughter in law has been raised very differently to me and her standards are much lower. Her house is very untidy and dirty, which imo is gross. Nothing has a place and as a consequence they can never find anything and when they do it is usually broken/crushed/ruined as it has been squashed under things. Clothes not ironed/torn. It drives me crazy.

If they were on their own i don't think it would be so bad, as i would think your life if you want to be dirty !!!!!!s and have to constantly replace things then crack on, but they have a child, my grand daughter and i do not want her thinking this is normal. I want her to have pride in her appearance and to value what possessions she has. Hopefully some of our standards will rub off on her.

Luckily we rub along nicely and we are quite close. It doesn't stop me wanting her to raise her game a bit though, for my grand daughters sake

Where's your son in all this? Your standards obviously didn't rub off on him.

just-jilly

Unfortunately they are not together. It drove him mad too.