Just needed to be heard for a little while

codemonkey

Arrgh. Why am I looking at dogs? There's a Bassett puppy who is just the cutest thing ever. Codemonkey, you cannot afford the dog walking for another dog, and you do not have time to toilet train a puppy. Furthermore dumbass dog is a diva who likes cuddles all the time.

But she's just soooo cute....


I'll probably take this photo down soon.

whitewing

I am back being a blood donor. A small contribution to society, but I love having my blood pressure taken, I don't know why.

I also seem to have made a couple of friends to walk home from the school run with. Considering they live nearby and I had lived in my house for over 5 years, the fact that we have now swapped names and started to swap histories is amazing. Walking DD to school is such a small thing to do, but is opening up new possibilities that we wouldn't have had if we rushed her off in the car. I was thinking about that yesterday. If we had driven her, we would have just gone to work early, leaving household chores to do in the evening. Sometimes I even sit and watch TV for 20 minutes before I go to work. I am so much more chilled out for taking time to do 'family things'.

whitewing

Aww - bassett puppy has made my morning.

Waves_and_Smiles

Good morning all!

Thank you so much, Pyxis and Oystercatcher. I am more resigned today and less frustrated, I am hurting myself and WaSp by allowing it to get to me because it won't actually change anything and believe me I have exhausted every possible reaction to try and make it different over the years. I can't change things, all I can change is my reaction to it and be there for WaSp when it goes wrong again. Sounds great on virtual paper, easier said than done!

I feel for my own guilt that I have to say there is some good in BIL. If he could turn his life around I would give him another very wary chance, but he is 62 now and has been this way since his early 20's so I can't see much changing. Plus he says that he doesn't want to change so that says it all. I do feel pity for him in a way because he like most people isn't a totally bad person, he has kind traits, they just get buried under anger, self-pity and alcohol and oddly a sense of superiority over everyone else. I don't hate him at all, I just want to strangle him most of the time! He has already spoken about how we wouldn't turn him away when MIL dies if he had nowhere to go. Even WaSp with all his loyalty told him there wasn't a chance that was happening. This is one of the problems, BIL believes he has an entitlement because he is a <family name> and that everyone with the same name will support him no matter what he does. His repeated cries of "We are <family name> and we stick together!" drive me insane and are also a trigger from my own family saying anyone but family are strangers. To be fair to him what he has experienced so far has shown him that he is supported through everything, even violence to ex-SIL, while I make quiet mumbles in the background about enabling...

I really do need to distance myself before I drive myself mad (madder).

Sorry to hear about your ear conditions, oyster. The physio was what I was thinking of. I still have problems with steps and kerbs but the physio made it a lot easier for me to stand up from chairs, and taught me to turn my whole body rather than turn my head when looking from side to side. So sorry that it isn't helping you, that is really frustrating.

Oh, look at that puppy face! She is adorable! I would have her in a heartbeat if I could! She is gorgeous!

That is lovely, whitewing! It is always wonderful to make new friends and I bet DD enjoys it, too!

codemonkey

Whitewing, I'm also a blood donor (when they let me - medication changes and all that). I like the idea that I'm saving 3 people each time I do it and it might be a bit grim but I love seeing the bag of blood afterwards. I find it fascinating. Your morning sounds lovely. I like to take some time to potter in the morning and get some stuff done before I leave the house rather than go to work earlier. Also, how lovely that you're making new friends.

WaS - it is a difficult thing to do, especially as you have to tread carefully. I think you're doing a very good job holding it together, but agree that you have to let things go a little bit. It's a difficult balance, especially when it's clear as day to you that your BIL is not a good person to be around, but there is always that loyalty aspect for WaSp. (I always picture WaSp in a stripey black and yellow jumper).

Arrgh, Mr Codemonkey would kill me if I came home with a puppy.

lostinrates

whitewing wrote: »

I am back being a blood donor. A small contribution to society, but I love having my blood pressure taken, I don't know why.

I also seem to have made a couple of friends to walk home from the school run with. Considering they live nearby and I had lived in my house for over 5 years, the fact that we have now swapped names and started to swap histories is amazing. Walking DD to school is such a small thing to do, but is opening up new possibilities that we wouldn't have had if we rushed her off in the car. I was thinking about that yesterday. If we had driven her, we would have just gone to work early, leaving household chores to do in the evening. Sometimes I even sit and watch TV for 20 minutes before I go to work. I am so much more chilled out for taking time to do 'family things'.

So health, social AND financial benefits, plus benefits to family life and time management. Win, win, win, win, win!

codemonkey

lostinrates wrote: »

So health, social AND financial benefits, plus benefits to family life and time management. Win, win, win, win, win!

Plus you're not contributing to school parking madness. There's a school on my route to work and I swear the driving around there is like wacky races during the school run. They've even started sending the police round to make sure nobody gets hurt.

Waves_and_Smiles

But she is lovely Code! Good job I am not there with you in real life right now or I would likely be pushing you in her direction!

WaSp is currently in a very cheerful Christmas jumper with little snowmen and tree's all over it! I buy him one every year for the cringe factor and I may have hidden his more sensible ones so he has no choice but to wear them...

codemonkey

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

But she is lovely Code! Good job I am not there with you in real life right now or I would likely be pushing you in her direction!

WaSp is currently in a very cheerful Christmas jumper with little snowmen and tree's all over it! I buy him one every year for the cringe factor and I may have hidden his more sensible ones so he has no choice but to wear them...

Oh don't. I'm working hard not to think about her.

I love Christmas jumpers. I'm going to buy another one for myself for this year. I even have one for dumbass dog. Do you know how hard it is to buy jumpers for big dogs? Everyone said I was mean but he liked it and I thought he looked adorable.

Waves_and_Smiles

Not mean at all if he liked it! That is true actually, you only seem to see outfits for tiny dogs, I don't think I have ever seen a big dog in one.

WaSp will be getting another Christmas jumper this year. I haven't bought reindeer yet so that will be this years theme!