Just needed to be heard for a little while

lostinrates

whitewing wrote: »

I think we are all just adjusting to safeguards as someone has a bright idea or two, and that can take a bit of getting used to. I think most people who know how will follow the guidelines as they are able to. .

I know I am not going to cope with the white posting safeguards without transgressing.

elsien

lostinrates wrote: »

I have to go shopping, I need a new bra, at least.

I cannot tell you all how much I do NOT want to go shopping. I tried to start looking on line and was just getting more and more confused so I think I do actually have to go to the 'shops'. I'm going to try to go tomorrow if I can.

.

You have my sympathies. I have been shopping for interview clothes and now have carrier bags full of stuff which are going back tomorrow either because a) I am an unstandard shape and they look awful or b) I just don't know what I was thinking buying them in the first place. And having been braless all my life, I'm now thinking I may need some type of croptop thingy because everything is either clingy or see through. I hate shopping. Clothes shopping is my personal idea of hell.

I have also had my haircut and people (mother!) are telling me I look 10 years younger. Which kind of begs the question as to why no-one bothered to tell me I was looking 90 on a good day.

seven-day-weekend

Waves_and_Smiles wrote: »

Guess who has been up all night? I feel sad and I have no idea why...

I used my time to think however and I wanted to throw out some possible topics that I am likely to post about in advance to check whether they are penguins or anyone minds me posting about them? The reason why is because if I am in bad situation alone at night like I was a few weeks ago I would still like to be able to post quickly at the time if I have no one else to talk to, but I don't want to trigger anyone. I will post any crisis in a white font but I might not be able to hang on for the hour for people to get back to me about whether I can or not, plus no one would be here at 3am anyway so I am asking in advance.

So does anyone feel a penguin is needed for the following topics?

Voices (I would automatically penguin anything I record that they say)
Other worlds (I will leave out anything violent in descriptions as I have been doing anyway)
Referring to self -harm without details (As in "I self-harmed" and that's all )
Descriptions of feeling panic and fear (Such as I am having an anxiety attack, I am shaking, etc)
Fear of illness (Liver failure, for example which I DON'T have)

I didn't include abuse because there are enough posts already on this thread detailing the types of abuse that I suffered which people can reference if they wish, so I don't think I have to be more specific other than to use the word 'abuse' and nothing more now.

That's me just about covered on the possible 3am-in-a-panic penguin front! I am probably being overcautious but I don't want to upset anyone if I post while psychotic, last time it was writing everything here that held me together and I would really love to feel that I can still do that.

I think you should write exactly as you want.

You have been so honest on this thread, it has been really informative and enlightening, we need you to be free to express yourself.

lostinrates

elsien wrote: »

You have my sympathies. I have been shopping for interview clothes and now have carrier bags full of stuff which are going back tomorrow either because a) I am an unstandard shape and they look awful or b) I just don't know what I was thinking buying them in the first place. And having been braless all my life, I'm now thinking I may need some type of croptop thingy because everything is either clingy or see through. I hate shopping. Clothes shopping is my personal idea of hell.

I have also had my haircut and people (mother!) are telling me I look 10 years younger. Which kind of begs the question as to why no-one bothered to tell me I was looking 90 on a good day.

I cannot go bra less.

Ah, and here is a crux of the stress of it, my body. . I just cannot get used to it. I am very lucky my husband makes me feel very desirable to him, but clothes shopping reminds me how I don't like how I look. I love clothes. I love underwear. Just not on me any more!

I cancelled my hair appoint, just cannot be bothered ATM.


What about a nice camisole elsien, with French knickers for 'best' and then some plainer camis / knickers for normal days?

They'll help fabric move nicely over you. And look and feel luxurious.

elsien

That's sad Lir, that you feel that way. Would OH be able to go along to boost your confidence and point out which ones do it for him?
What's the easiest way for you to shop? Do you know which shops suit and which aren't worth the effort?

lostinrates

elsien wrote: »

That's sad Lir, that you feel that way. Would OH be able to go along to boost your confidence and point out which ones do it for him?
What's the easiest way for you to shop? Do you know which shops suit and which aren't worth the effort?

He would, but time is very tight,( he is not here at all week days) I don't really want to waste our time shopping. Besides , he's not very critical and says every thing looks good and tries to make me buy more ( I know weird husband) which becomes more stressful for me.

He is who I normally shop with though.

Normally I try not to shop! Eventually my mother or my husband lose patience and either drag or me out or buy me stuff or in anticipation of this I choose a few things on line or go out with DH buy something and don't have to think about it for a while.

I do ok from supermarkets. I don't like buying supermarket clothes because I worry about the ethics of their origin and I hate the mass production ( I am a 'clothes are art' person) but I hate shopping now more) and the occasional on line purchase.

I was relieved I didn't have to go to that function with DH in the end mainly because of the clothes issue.

Solarjunkie

LiR, how far are you from a big Debenhams? You could meet up with a free personal stylist to help you through the process.

http://www.debenhams.com/customer-service/personal-shopper

Here's their announcement about the new service -

Department store chain Debenhams has relaunched its personal styling service at its Oxford Street flagship in London as part of the store’s 25 million refurbishment. According to the retailer: “Women are no longer just apples and pears and most men want to be a parsnip”, so the department store has teamed up with 10 Years Younger presenter Nicky Hambleton-Jones to devise a new body-shape guide that will be utilised by its team of personal stylists.

The free service, which has been rebranded from ‘Personal Shopper’ to ‘Personal Stylist’ will see the team retrain with a bespoke training programme designed by Hambleton-Jones and his NHJ Style Consultancy, showing the stylists how to translate fashion trends to meet the consumer’s personal brief, body shape and budget.

Debenhams relaunches personal styling serviceGaynor Davey, personal stylist manager at Debenhams Oxford Street, said: “Since Trinny & Susannah brought dressing for your shape to the nation 13 years ago, we’ve based our wardrobes on a set of rules designed around what we believed our shapes to be.

“For many this has created confusion about anything outside those few shapes – and it has never been extended to men. Our new free Personal Stylist service and body-shape guide is about giving shoppers simple tools to help them look and feel fabulous – while letting men get in on the action too.”

Debenhams launches new body-shape guide
To coincide with the relaunch, Debenhams has created a body-shaping guide for both men and women, after research revealed that 86 percent of customers felt confused about dressing for their body shape.

The guide reveals that that the modern-day female form has evolved into a “fruit cocktail” of silhouettes, from the “double cherry” depicting curvy bust and hips with a small waist to the “rhubarb” for women with slim hips and small busts. While men’s changing contours inspire a whole vegetable patch of comparisons such as the “Aubergine” for men with rounded shoulders and slim arms with a bit of a tummy and possibly larger bottom and the “Leek” for men with slim shoulders, hips and legs.

Davey added: “We launched size 16 mannequins in our Oxford Street store at the end of last year and we’re continuing our commitment to promoting body confidence with more shapes and sizes for both men and women in our body shape guide.

“Our service is not about being too prescriptive, but instead helping to inspire people to try new things and identify when something isn’t quite right.”

The free service is available on the third floor of the Oxford Street store and shoppers can book appointments online or in person.

System

Hello team WaS, hope everyone is okay today, hugs to anyone who needs them. :wave:

I too think WaS and anyone is crisis should be able to post when needed, its good we have safeguards though and tbh things can always be edited afterwards if needs be.

My shift went okay and i had the lovely surprise of my parents and my sister shopping there, so they popped in to say hello Told my mum i will give her a ring on saturday and said to my sister i'd try and fit in a visit before she and my brother move to uni next week

My mood seems to be back on an even keel for now, did wonder if it was going up a bit (just a few things that made me think that, the lack of needing sleep, feeling hyper, spending a bit too much and stuff) but i think it's okay atm. back at the doctors next week so i'm sure she can keep an eye on me

LiR i despise clothes shopping. It depresses me to go with anyone else as they always seem to find loads of clothes where as i find nothig fits me and i feel fat and unattractive in everything

Waves_and_Smiles

Ahem, Good Morning? Well this is an interesting sleep pattern!

Ensuring chimps is the best autocorrect I have ever seen! I, too love Dyac!

I do most of my food and clothes shopping online, LIR. I haven't (yet) managed to mess it up but I always get WaSp to check before I click submit. With clothes I order them from supermarkets mostly as I only need cheap things to wear sitting in doors and WaSp returns the ones that don't fit.

I haven't had a new bra for ages. Those I can't buy from supermarkets as I am rather erm top heavy and they rarely fit unless brought from a clothes shop. I do have a couple of Rigby and Peller bra's which give me the most support so I am hoping that by the time they are held together with safety pins that I can afford a new one.

I think with the whiting out of posts it is for what we do if we can? I certainly wouldn't judge someone if they didn't do it/messed it up and I am sure no one else would. As nobody seemed to find any penguins in the post I made about triggery topics then I shall mostly post as normal but I will white out anything that I am unsure of.

I certainly don't expect anyone brand new who is desperate to worry about whiting a post if they are upset, it is the last thing that anyone is going to want to think about. I put myself in that category, too. I will always try to use white for triggery bits, but if I am very unwell at the time I may not manage it, in which case I will do it as soon as I am able. I always try to be careful how I word things anyway and already leave out the more violent parts of other worlds so I don't think my posting style will change much. Thank you for saying you want me to be able to post as normal though, I am glad that everyone doesn't mind it and it interests people. I love the support that I get here and the fact people get something out of it makes it so worthwhile for me.

Typical timing, whitewing. I'm sorry. At least you have met the lovely doctor, though so you will hopefully be more confident next week.

Oh, poor Harry. I hope that he is feeling better now. I am with him on silence, when I have an episode the slightest sound echoes and sounds 100 times louder. WaSp's breathing makes me panic because it seems as if he is breathing directly into my ear.

So glad that you you had a good day, MU!

Now coffee, and err start the day?

dibuzz

Not much point going to sleep now even if I could, may as well get up and do something.