child being bullied continuously

suziemoon

My son was bullied in year 5, he stood up to the bully and was called in to the Headteacher and then made to apologise to the other child in front of the class. The Bully who had bullied almost every kid in the class was under Social Services and had never been pulled up by the school or at home. I wrote to the school, The Board of Governors and the Local Education Authority saying that I did not feel that the school was protecting my child and that I was keeping him out of school until the situation was resolved, within 24 hours the LEA had been into school and had the situation sorted - the bully was taken out of classes and taught how to behave properly something he was not receiving at home. End result was that the bully stopped bullying. May be worth approaching the LEA?

meritaten

sorry but i forgot to mention it was half term last week. the children throwing stones have picked on him in school and it was dealt with. it just keeps happening outside of school.

the karate would be for confidence mainly instanding up for himself. i dont condone violence and have up until recently told my son to leave it and come home and not retaliate. but as its happenning all the time now i need to do something as does he. thank you meritaten for your advice x[/QUOTE]


yes, they go back to school today or tomorrow don't they? I don't think school HAS dealt with it effectively if its carried on during half term and outside school. the object is to stop the bullying - and that should include outside school - otherwise its a situation which could explode in school.
you sound as if you realise that martial arts in real life is nothing like 'The Karate Kid'. he isn't going to be beating seven bells out of the bullies after a few weeks of karate! but, if you believe it will help his confidence and he can make good friends there (the bonding between the people you were 'sparring' with and hitting and kicking during the session can be very close), then go for it. just be there for the first few sessions to make sure he is coping ok with the class (bullied kids often get upset at the 'pretend' violence, and a full on sparring session can scare them).
keep us posted on how he gets on, in school and if he takes up karate. I will be thinking of him. I hate bullying, it happened to my son and we nearly had a 'worst case' scenario. I believe bullying MUST be nipped in the bud because I know just how damaging it can be if it isn't stopped ASAP.

CRANKY40

My 9 year old son does karate. He still doesn't retaliate to name calling etc, but on two occasions when another child has tried to throw a punch at him (one play fighting, one not) he was able to block the punch. He did not fight back, he let them walk away, which suits his nature but the important thing is that he remained unhurt and the little offenders haven't tried a second time.

TrickyWicky

sadandlonely wrote: »

i always stick up for my son

I was a kid in a similar situation to this moons ago. The only thing I can say is (don't take this the wrong way) if he is being bullied, he's not doing things right to fit in with the crowd.

I read once that Jeremy Clarkson was bullied at school. He told his mum who told him that he must be doing something wrong. He turned rebel and his peers loved him for it. Now look.. he's a multimillionaire, leads the planets most famous car TV show and has fans everywhere - including Ofcom lol.

Seriously, don't mumsy the kid too much. Don't tell him every day that violence and fighting don't solve anything. The simple fact is that boys only acquire respect by gaining it. They either fit in with the crowd and be a little rebellious or they fight for their respect.

As someone else suggested, self defence classes would help build him up and send the bullies running.

sadandlonely

its happened again today. the two kids knocked for him and heard me say that they had to behave as my ds would be learning karate to deal with their bullying. 5 mins later my ds come in saying they were calling me names. now normally id shrug it off but fat was one of the names. i was bulimic so went over and had a word with the mother.

she wasnt bothered so told her they obviously needed counselling if they had that much respect for people. she wasnt too impressed and it got to the point where she was going to hit me but didnt. blaming my son for the stone throwing.

can see why the kids are the way they are when they have a mother with that attitude. i will be going down the school tomorrow and if i dont get any joy, then i will be moving house and moving him to a different school as this is it now. i have had enough now. still shaking as i write this now.

sadandlonely

ds was confined to the house yesterday and now again today. why are some kids so evil?

susieq87

sadandlonely wrote: »

its happened again today. the two kids knocked for him and heard me say that they had to behave as my ds would be learning karate to deal with their bullying. 5 mins later my ds come in saying they were calling me names. now normally id shrug it off but fat was one of the names. i was bulimic so went over and had a word with the mother.

you need to stop fighting your son's battles for him. you're only making it worse as you can see.

sadandlonely

its so hard to stand there though watching them belittle him. what do i do? i know i make it worse on times but i cant keep seeing him upset and knowing i cant do anything.

is it worth me notifying the school?

lulu_92

Hang on, one of them is his cousin?

You need to talk to one or both of his parents, or maybe even him. It might encourage the parents to think of using therapy or something.

sadandlonely

lulu_92 wrote: »

Hang on, one of them is his cousin?

You need to talk to one or both of his parents, or maybe even him. It might encourage the parents to think of using therapy or something.

not the two from today they live across from his grandparents.

one from last week who was kicking him, that was his cousin