Akward Situation...

fufu_banterwaite

Early on in this thread I asked Bunnie if she still loved him and if he still loved her. She said:

"I love him. You'd have to ask him if he feels the same."

I found that answer quite worrying - Bunnie you aren't even sure if he loves you anymore?

quidsy

In the end, you can't make yourself sure about something when you're just not.

And therein lies the problem, 6 years & he still isn't sure? What is there to know.

quidsy

I don't understand this. You've lived with your girlfriend for only 9 months, but because you think you might need a bit more time to be sure that they are the person you want to spend your life with, you are having your cake and eating it?

They had 5 years before moving in, if he wasn't sure then he should have held off having her move across country to be with him.

POPPYOSCAR

Some people just do not want to be married.

I am one of them.

We have been together over 25 years he is the love of my life and if anything should happen to him before me I will not have another partner.

But I do not want to get married.

heartbreak_star

Could you explain why not, if your partner asks? Would they like to be married? Just curious

HBS x

tea_lover

POPPYOSCAR wrote: »

Some people just do not want to be married.

I am one of them.

We have been together over 25 years he is the love of my life and if anything should happen to him before me I will not have another partner.

But I do not want to get married.

I think this is what some people find hard to grasp. I'm sure about my relationship with OH (together nearly 9 years, lived together 3), but I'm not sure if I want to get married. Not wanting to marry (or not being sure one way or the other) isn't necessarily any reflection on your feelings for the person you're with.

POPPYOSCAR

heartbreak_star wrote: »

Could you explain why not, if your partner asks? Would they like to be married? Just curious

HBS x

I cannot explain why really. I do not see the need on a personal level other than for financial reasons.

He did used to want to get married in the early years of our relationship but accepted that I did not and it does not bother him.

I know for some, especially if you are young and romantic, it is hard to understand. Our daughter does not get it either!

FBaby

quidsy wrote: »

And therein lies the problem, 6 years & he still isn't sure? What is there to know.

...or 9 months living together, arguments about significant issues during that and he is rightly still not sure.

FBaby

quidsy wrote: »

They had 5 years before moving in, if he wasn't sure then he should have held off having her move across country to be with him.

How can you be sure you will be happy living with someone before you actually do so? My OH and I were deeply in love and even talked about marriage before we moved together and therefore didn't expect for a second that adjusting living together would be so difficult. Thankfully, we managed to find compromises and getting used to our differences, but in the first few months or it, I can say that I certainly wasn't as sure any longer and him even less.

FBaby

out of curiosity poppyoscar and tea lover, if you don't mind me asking, were either of you, or your OH ever married before?