The number...truth or lie??

lostinrates

VestanPance wrote: »

No it's not, but much like those annoyed in this thread that society frowns upon women who have slept around. The same society does the same with guys that don't want to go and bed every woman they meet. Pretty much exculsively from other men right enough.

I've had all sorts of comments thrown at me due to knocking back "open goals" over the last few years.

Mix with better people is all I can say!

So, if your experience is negative and did you say you would take an opinion on a 'number' , I'm sorry I cannot remember:o, you still recommend OP take a line that put her in a potentially negative situation when she is clearly expressing some discomfort here?


Anyway, OP, hope its all resolved now.

Domayne

lostinrates wrote: »

Mix with better people is all I can say!

So, if your experience is negative and did you say you would take an opinion on a 'number' , I'm sorry I cannot remember:o, you still recommend OP take a line that put her in a potentially negative situation when she is clearly expressing some discomfort here?


Anyway, OP, hope its all resolved now.

Thank you
It wasn't really resolved as such - My answer was just to not bother answering his texts. He sent me one on Saturday with a sad face smile but I haven't heard from him since
I think I have some extreme issues though because I'm finding it impossible to feel any kind of closeness/connection with anyone since my ex and I broke up over 2 years ago. Any guys that come near, I push them away and this isn't really the first questions about myself that I close up on and 'run away' so to speak. I think I need to work on this before I even bother attempting some kind of 'relationship' =/

MeganConway

I would just say Its in the past, and that it shouldn't matter how many Lovers you have had!

Torry_Quine

When I married we were both aware that we'd had no previous sexual partners and that was important to us.

I would say that this is a question that you should only ask if you are confident that you can cope with the answer as it may not be what you expect.

Tiglath

I've never felt the need to lie and have usually given the numerical answer. If it was someone I thought was likely to freak out, I'd just smile sweetly and say 'Well, you know those pick & mix sweet shops ....' And then I'd dump him.

lostinrates

Domayne wrote: »

Thank you
It wasn't really resolved as such - My answer was just to not bother answering his texts. He sent me one on Saturday with a sad face smile but I haven't heard from him since
I think I have some extreme issues though because I'm finding it impossible to feel any kind of closeness/connection with anyone since my ex and I broke up over 2 years ago. Any guys that come near, I push them away and this isn't really the first questions about myself that I close up on and 'run away' so to speak. I think I need to work on this before I even bother attempting some kind of 'relationship' =/

I would consider the very mixed and strong reaction here. You really are not alone on this one.

lexington013

Call me old fashioned, but what a thing to ask, why does it matter?
Not a question I would ask a woman after a few dates or at all.
Seems strange for him to ask you, and to be honest it's pretty personal. How did it make you feel when he asked? If it made you feel uncomfortable then perhaps he is not right for you.......

VestanPance

lostinrates wrote: »

Mix with better people is all I can say!

So, if your experience is negative and did you say you would take an opinion on a 'number' , I'm sorry I cannot remember:o, you still recommend OP take a line that put her in a potentially negative situation when she is clearly expressing some discomfort here?


Anyway, OP, hope its all resolved now.

I think the OP should be honest. To all those that give advise to provide so called "funny" answers or avoidance tactics then my guess is this will set alarm bells off about dishonesty, or trying to hide something. Those are poison in any relationship, no matter how funny you think you're being. If you are so uncomfortable answering any question asked by your partner then maybe you need to consider your compatibility with that person.

Based on further information the OP provided I do think her boyfriend sounds like a bit of an immature idiot. Going on his other questions one who's spent more time watching !!!!!! than he has conversing with women.

I don't classify my experience as negative. I can easily laugh off the comments of sad blokes. I've not been attempting to date and have had a dozen or so offers from ladies, as well as the receptionist in the work who keeps on trying to set me with her daughter*! They should take a look at themselves. They're trying and getting nowhere.

* It's been a long time since I was last dating, but I'm pretty sure your mum trying to set you up with a nice man would be a "hell no" unless things have changed dramatically in the last 20 years! :rotfl:

jaylee3

As a few have said on here; it's a bit weird and puts me in mind of control freak/sociopath or something similar, if someone wants to know how many men I have sh@gged.

And I reckon at some point, he would try and use it against me, and throw the info I gave him in my face.

And if you *had* [EMAIL="sh@gged"]sh@gged[/EMAIL] 300 men (I haven't BTW!) what would he think? I would just say 'I don't get why you need to know.' And TBH it would put me off him.

meritaten

tbh - I have said I think this guy is 'off', I think he is trying to find out how experienced she is and how 'adventurous' she is. I don't want to give too many details but, this smacks to me of someone who is into a type of sex not many women will do. and he is trying to find out if he can persuade her into 'accomodating' his desires. and this is BEFORE he has even slept with her! it rings all my alarm bells!

and its really sweet how many women think its acceptable to share their limited sexual experiences with a stranger. judging by those who think its a legitimate question to ask someone after only a few dates.