Help OH is ruining everything

puddy

no thats far too threatening

puddy

gunsandbanjos wrote: »

Definitely not! My DH eats what i make and never complains, but i also know what he particularly likes so will take care to make sure i make his favourites regularly.

i would have thought thats what we all do, but for some reason it was considered as pandering to him!

Any

puddy wrote: »

i would have thought thats what we all do, but for some reason it was considered as pandering to him!

Sorry Puddy, you are getting very emotional over this obviously, because what was "called" pandering was definitely NOT just making what he likes... as the poster you were quoting was suggesting.

puddy

no im not getting emotional about it. he has his quirks and they are irrational with regards to the 'sell by dates' that he goes on about. but working around that is not what i would call pandering, its about respecting his needs. im only too aware of how these have come about, even if he isnt!

its harder for me to accept these quirks i suppose, because i am the complete opposite, i would happy pick of bits of mold of cheese and bread and still eat it. i'll eat food thats been left out as long as it smells and looks ok. some of that would make others heave (he would probably pass out), but we're all different.

the frustating thing about him is what i consider to be 1950s taste buds, overcooked meat and veg. whereas i used to live off pasta, eggs, veg and beans. the frustration is because that is all cheap food and quick to cook.

i also do find it difficult that im not normally tolerant of these types of quirk whereas he is completely accepting of others and their sensitivities, including mine. maybe we should all be a bit like that.

and yes, i do find some on here talk as if they have children that they can dictate to what to eat and not to eat in the cupboards, i find that bizarre, which is what i meant by the school dinners thing.

but no, im not emotional about it! i see all the shades of grey about it. i am however getting quite worked up on discussion time so this is light relief...

Any

Oh well, you have to be in the right state of mind for discussion board, that is for sure!!!
There are days that I just know I better stay away:-))

Well, you might see it as "having children you can dictate what to eat" and some might see what you are going through as "pandering his every need, under the threat that otherwise you will suffer for it in future... " (your words, not mine)

There is always a line - what is reasonable - ie I do not expect OH to eat eggs and chips every day (though he wouldn't mind, his favourite comfort food actually:-))) and that is why I will never see it as dictating him what to eat and he does not expect to have steak for tea every day and fresh bottle of milk every day (unless it gets used up).

And what is reasonable that one has to go through and give up to make another person who does not meet you in the middle happy!

Everyone has the line somewhere else..

notatvstar

... the 'sell-by-date' thing aways amuses me. I had a small, but quite delicious, victory last week as OH found a tub of unopened single cream in the fridge that was 4 days over due. It was still sealed and not 'blown'. He tossed it in the bin, after which I dived in a fished it out with an emphatic '!!!!!!!'

"It's out of date," he whined...

"So...?"

"It'll be off!"

"Prove it!"

... so we opened it (well I did as he's a bit of a wuss when it comes to things like this).

<... drum roll....>. I stuck my finger in it and, guess what!, it tasted fine. I didn't die and so we had spag carbonara that night

Any

I have to say my OH fortunately would eat anything as long as it doesn't smell, I go day maybe two after sell by date (though it doesn't happen very often-I hate wasting food so I incorporate things into menus) and it is me who then worry about safety if it is any longer!

Sambucus_Nigra

http://www.lovefoodhatewaste.com/

Interesting reading on sell by/best before/use by and the differences between each. The only one that matters is 'Use by'.

Any

Yes, that is the one I meant...

puddy

Any wrote: »

Well, you might see it as "having children you can dictate what to eat" and some might see what you are going through as "pandering his every need, under the threat that otherwise you will suffer for it in future... " (your words, not mine)

im not sure where i have said this

i did say that i think that some people on here talk about their OH as if they were children and that they come across as if they dictate what they eat

but yes, there needs to be compromise, i have to compromise on the dreaded sell bys and he has to compromise by not eating what i consider to be rubbish (processed foods)