Help OH is ruining everything

gunsandbanjos

You ladies have made me very grateful for my DH, he is a royal pain in the !!! sometimes but when it comes to this kinda thing he is a gem.

He eats what i give him, never moans about it. Will ask about stuff in the fridge before he takes it in case its for a meal.

He is ex military and with the exception of liver will eat absolutely anything, he is also my little waste disposal, if anything needs used up i feed it to him ( he will eat odd concoctions!).

Reverbe

Gillyx wrote: »

My OH is the exact same, he will snack and snack and snack, and I feed him loads already.

For example, the other night, I made us chicken wraps with home made wedges and salad for me (none for him he doesn't like it) so I made 17! chicken goujons for him then threw in another 5 of Mr S's fresh goujons, and used 2 large baked potatoes for the wedges, and gave him 3 wraps. 20 minutes after dinner he made 3 slices of toast and a large tin of spaghetti, then later on that night, a bowl of cereal, 2 kit kat chunkys and a packet of crisps!

I really don't know what to do any more, I just let him get on with it.

Are these men obese???:eek::eek: Personally I wouldnt put up with it. If I had found this out after marriage and had to I would try giving them an itemised fully costed bill including fuel costs for cooking of every item every night. Surely if they see how much their endless stuffing food in their mouths is costing and how it will make you all more able to pay for treats or even household bills they will think twice... IMO any decent person would surely..

Also try making them pay for their own food. its cos they are not seeing how much it costs...

*Chattie*

Reverbe wrote: »

Are these men obese???:eek::eek: Personally I wouldnt put up with it. If I had found this out after marriage and had to I would try giving them an itemised fully costed bill including fuel costs for cooking of every item every night. Surely if they see how much their endless stuffing food in their mouths is costing and how it will make you all more able to pay for treats or even household bills they will think twice... IMO any decent person would surely..

Also try making them pay for their own food. its cos they are not seeing how much it costs...

but you aren't married so how would you know?

The OH is already paying for their own food, its called a marriage/partnership or do you suggest they go out and buy their own individual pot noodles?

IMO any decent person would not suggest this

puddy

Reverbe wrote: »

Are these men obese???:eek::eek: Personally I wouldnt put up with it. If I had found this out after marriage and had to I would try giving them an itemised fully costed bill including fuel costs for cooking of every item every night. Surely if they see how much their endless stuffing food in their mouths is costing and how it will make you all more able to pay for treats or even household bills they will think twice... IMO any decent person would surely..

Also try making them pay for their own food. its cos they are not seeing how much it costs...

you're doing the rounds on this site and just winding people up. do you think a partner is someone with no rights in the home?

puddy

*Chattie* wrote: »

but you aren't married so how would you know?

The OH is already paying for their own food, its called a marriage/partnership or do you suggest they go out and buy their own individual pot noodles?

IMO any decent person would not suggest this

oh, you already said it for me!

euronorris

puddy wrote: »

but this is an example of what im talking about, who are we to decide that we can dictate what someone can eat in their own home. you say 'run out of food' but my OH simply goes out and buys his own, it will consist of stag chilli, fray bentos, crap basically, things i dont want him eating, things he cant afford to buy

left to their own devices they will waste money unless an alternative is given, mine got a shock when i found a load of marks and spencers receipts which he had bought food for lunches at work, totalling about £10 a time, i found 4 of those, all rubbish, croissants, pastries, pork pies etc etc

Yeah, but that's his choice and his money.

Honestly, the easiest way to deal with this is to have a budget and meal plan and then buy and cook accordingly. IF he wants anything different to that, then not only can he pay for it, but he can go and get it too.

This is how OH and I work the food most of the time. He's open to meal plans, but doesn't actually want to plan it, and likes to maintain variety and have some treats. I say fine, but that's up to him to buy if he wants it.

He didn't like it at first, but I just couldn't pander to his food whims. I tried to at first, to keep him happy, but that made me miserable so was a bit pointless really. This way works better as OH feels like he is treating both of us, especially when he orders a takeaway (a rare treat), and I think that appeals to his masculine 'must look after woman' side IYSWIM.

Sambucus_Nigra

I also have a diamond - he snacks on just the snacks [bagels and I get reduced organic bread at work] and pretty much all else is just what we menu plan. We have a whiteboard which gets the meals written on it, with a shopping list to the side for things we need to buy for the menu and he does the shopping each week so the more we buy the more he has to carry back from the car. He used to throw stuff away if left over and now he will just leave it for me to either freeze or put in a container depending on when I'm going to re-use it...as I asked him to do.

Our bills are shared 50/50 as our wages are pretty much even but with him doing the shopping he knows the prices and now spots a bargain and comes back proudly to tell me he got such and such as they were reduced. Before - he would only get the one as we don't have much space but now he appreciates it's worth stashing some things after buying them on offer.

Plus - we both hate shopping so the less time he spends in a shop and the quicker he can get out the better.

puddy

euronorris wrote: »

Yeah, but that's his choice and his money.

well mine wouldnt care if he gets in loads of debt which then puts pressure on us both, so its not his money so to speak, its our money

maman

I suppose it all depends on how your relationship works. If all men were interchangeable then we wouldn't need to waste time looking for Mr Right!:rotfl:

My DH is a star when it comes to food so I have none of the above problems. We organise our finances into 3 sections: my money, his money and our money. Food shopping comes from 'our' money so I think we each have a responsiblity to be frugal to save money for other things like treats for ourselves. I do the shopping and ask him for half the money at the end of the month, same goes for other shared household bills. I'd get very cross if I was paying half of a bill for a load of carp or food that got thrown away. Some of my friends think the way we organise our finances is strange but it works for us.

heretolearn_2

I suppose I'm lucky food-wise then, he basically eats what I give him. The only snack he likes is cashew nuts, which is a pain as they are SO expensive,but I just buy one big bag a week for the cupboard (costs about £5) and then if he wants more he buys them.

Very rarely turns his nose up at anything, he does get funny likes and dislikes all of a sudden though. I've been cooking us poached eggs for years (my favourite) and only about a month ago he told me he doesn't like them and doesn't like runny yolks, and can he have his eggs fried till they are all hard. But he'd been eating runny yolked poached eggs before...weird.