and his world has come crashing down

RuthnJasper

Reading the OP's last post made me feel very, very sad. Most especially for her child. Why put a child back in that situation?!

I wonder how many other sprogs this paragon of manhood currently has toddling around the streets with their various mothers? Because if this isn't the case now, it certainly will be in a few years' time.

hazyjo

'Lonely'?

After less than I think two weeks?!

Sounds to me like you have some serious self worth/self respect issues. Do you not like yourself very much? Do you not think you deserve a nice man - or that you can be happy with your own company? I doubt you'll even be on your own forever, but you will never ever meet that one decent man who may be round the corner if you're with this idiot.

Being 'lonely' is not a good reason for taking back a lying cheating ex.

I'm sure you will look back in years to come and regret it.

Jx

charlishae

Oh gosh you are taking him back after what he has done because you are lonely? seriously?! I know it must be so hard and you will probably feel lonely as you are used to being in a relationship but it wont always be that way and one day you will meet a man who loves and respects you which this guy clearly doesn't or he wouldn't have cheated. Don't take him back and focus on you and your daughter and try and keep yourself busy.
I think if you stay with him you are condemming yourself to a life of misery. How are you going to feel when you have to see this child and the fact your OH is going to have to keep in contact with this woman forever? You are also basically telling him its ok to cheat as you will take him back and I wouldn't be surprised if he does it again. Please make sure you think about this properly.

RuthnJasper

hazyjo wrote: »

'Lonely'?

After less than I think two weeks?!

Sounds to me like you have some serious self worth/self respect issues. Do you not like yourself very much? Do you not think you deserve a nice man - or that you can be happy with your own company? I doubt you'll even be on your own forever, but you will never ever meet that one decent man who may be round the corner if you're with this idiot.

Being 'lonely' is not a good reason for taking back a lying cheating ex.

I'm sure you will look back in years to come and regret it.

Jx

This x 1000 :T

Lonely? I would much rather be lonely than cuckolded. I'm lonely now - but I'm not miserable.

FBaby

alias*alibi, do you think you would cope as well if OH had decided to have a relationship with his other daughter? I do recall that you encouraged him to do so and it was his decision not to, so no blame to have, but I can't but think that it would be much harder to move on is that child was there to constantly remind you of what happened.

That's the thing, I don't expect Meesha has even yet gone into that level of conversation as to whether he would want to have contact with this other child.

savingmummy

I think you need to think before taking him back.
Have you sat down and spoken to him about what happens now?


How will you find being with him and having this woman in your lives?
He will no doubt be following the pregnancy? attending appointments?
Then the birth of his child and the financial side of it.


It won`t be easy.


Many people go on and survive, but many find it too hard.

alias*alibi

FBaby wrote: »

alias*alibi, do you think you would cope as well if OH had decided to have a relationship with his other daughter? I do recall that you encouraged him to do so and it was his decision not to, so no blame to have, but I can't but think that it would be much harder to move on is that child was there to constantly remind you of what happened.

That's the thing, I don't expect Meesha has even yet gone into that level of conversation as to whether he would want to have contact with this other child.

No if I was honest I wouldn't be as far forward as I am now if his other child was in our lives; I think it's more the contact with the OW that would get to me more than seeing his child which of course is my DD's half sister which is why I tried to get my OH to engage in talks about contact; for the girls' sakes.

Yes you are correct I tried to get my OH and the OW to talk to each other about contact; which they did but she was adamant it wasn't happening and has blocked all ways of contacting her so... We can't afford court and if I was honest I would resent help paying legal fees as well as CSA. Harsh but true.

PlymouthMaid

Oh Meesha, you do not need him in your life to be happy. It will take a little time to lose the lonely feeling but try being single for a while.

getting-sorted-sarah

What you feel is not loneliness, it is bereavement. Whether he is with you or not, there has been a huge loss, and you won't make it go away just by having his (or anyone else's) physical presence.
A horrible thing happened and you have to deal with it. You will deal with it, one way or another you will work through it, but you can't go back to 'normal', you can't have what you want most of all - your old life.
Your new life can be great, and it may even, after loads of work, be great with him.

sharnad

Meesha.P wrote: »

sorry for waste your time i'm going to take him back i cant bear the lonelyness any more

It's going to be hard for you being the other woman while he carets on a relationship with his girlfriend abd baby