and his world has come crashing down

lindsaygalaxy

This time about 5 years ago while I was pregnant my ex started cheating on me. 4 weeks after giving birth to child 2 he left and moved in with her. She knew all along I was pregant and had a child. Not once have I thought of her as the victim, she knew what she was doing. They are still together. Plenty of times I have wanted to tell her my side, but I still can't bare to look at her.

Don't punish yourself. Take a break from it all and be prepared, if you won't (and i'm not saying you should at all) take him back she probably will.

PlymouthMaid

Have a lovely mini holiday Meesha and put these rotten sods behind you emotionally. Give you little girl a big big cuddle and have lots of fun and ice cream

MamaMoo_2

Sounds to me like his attitude towards you probably changed around the time he found out she was pregnant.
Dirty scumbag.
Stay strong, you have done nothing wrong.

PeacefulWaters

baby_frogmella wrote: »

Why does your life revolve around facebook?

Desperate for information. Understanding. Facts. Maybe an opportunity to vent a little anger too.

Having been fed lies for over a year seeking any source of detail is understandable and Facebook, this forum etc is helping in a strange way to provide this.

When you're head's all over the place you flail around wildly trying to fit things into place. After a time there maybe a realisation that some answers will never be found because often they don't exist (and knowing where they did it etc really doesn't achieve much, but at the outset you want to know everything). But there's a process to go through to get there.

I'm also quite a fan of outing an illicit relationship as loudly as possible. Facebook is ideal for that. It removes the main feature of a typical affair - secrecy.

Once the excitement of that secrecy is gone the naughty couple often realise their relationship is a sham based on lies and little else.

meritaten

What Truth? His Truth, Her Truth? then there is Your Truth. what you are going to get is Her Version which may or may not be True at all!

I think you are just going to be hurt if you meet with this woman. It may be delightful to sit and trash him - but don't forget that she may well post her version of your 'meeting' on Facebook, and you may well not like it one bit.

Meesha.P

it was a big mistake having a few glass of wine earliar. i now feel teriible and so lonely i'v never felt lonely before and its not nice. i'm not liking people calling telling me how sorry they are. i just turned my phone off in the end. we are off to torquey in the morning and i cant wait to get away. it will be reliefed being a place where nobody knows me and i can just be free from it all. if there is some one out there reading this and you are cheating on your partner or thinking of cheating just dont. the pain you will cause is not worth it.

Yorkie1

Hope you do switch off your phone, and manage to get some peace away from it all over the next few days.

One thing, though - what is your sister doing posting on your FB account? Surely that was your choice as to whether to reveal the information and what to say.

Netwizard

Just be glad he's now someone elses problem, and he will probably !!!!!! on her from a great height at some point too. Once a cheat, always a cheat


/edit - and bloody facebook does my nut in! Switch it off!!

PeacefulWaters

Netwizard wrote: »

Just be glad he's now someone elses problem, and he will probably !!!!!! on her from a great height at some point too. Once a cheat, always a cheat !

Or she'll ditch him as the fun of the forbidden is over.

FBaby

Meesha, my heart goes to you. I can totally understand you itching to meet her and try to get answers. I would be just the same and I expect I would go ahead with it, just because otherwise, I would torture myself mentally with questions. It wouldn't be about expecting her to tell me the truth, but about information that could help me built a picture of what happened and maybe why. I would need to gain some internal understanding to be able to turn the page and move on and find some peace of mind.

That's me though, we are all different. In the end, you need to do what will help you. I do think it was an excellent idea to go away though, it's amazing how removing yourself physically can help a bit removing yourself mentally and emotionally too. When you hurt the most, remember that ultimately, he is the one who has lost the most, and you will be able to move on knowing you've done nothing wrong. He will have to do that with that constant reminder that he lost everything through his selfish and idiotic behaviour.