Wife accused of cheating, denies it...

nebakanezer

I should also say that my wife is a very honest and caring person, that's why all this is such a shock and got my head all twisted. When this first started she said there was no one more shocked than her to hear these things, her very best friend from childhood has helped us a lot, and we're going to portugal next week and I've bought her a nice ring by way of apology for not trusting her right from the beginning, which is what I should've done, I just can't help the irrational thoughts, in a bad person for this to happen to, I'm a real worrier.

I think there is a lot of jealousy too, my wife has had a difficult life, and I come from a really good family, and, as much as I hate to say it, i'm a very well liked person, soft and caring, and the kind of people gossiping have pretty messed up lives.

Thank you all for your comments, positive and negative, I appreciate them all and I'm open minded enough to take them on board, perhaps I'm a little too open minded at times though!

nebakanezer

BigJockKnew wrote: »

Sounds like she's horny when she gets back from a night out.....What could be making her horny while she's out drinking?

My wife is not overly fussed about sex, it's more me to be honest

nebakanezer

marisco wrote: »

What was the outcome to your SIL's previous disclosures? Was it proved that she was telling the truth or lying? I am not expecting you to divulge this on here, but why is she on powerful medication? What are the known side effects if the dosage she is taking isn't working for her?

It was about gambling, and she told her best friend her husband was spending 1000's (which he wasn't) they fell out badly and I always wondered why the friend blamed my sister in law.

The medication is extreme pain medication, which she's been addicted to in the past

Mojisola

nebakanezer wrote: »

Obviously I don't want to believe it, but obviously I can't ignore it, but what am I supposed to do when my wife swears to me it isn't true, and for every one person who says it's true, at least another ten, including my wife who I've trusted for 13 years tells me it isn't, this isn't about an affair, I know that's not true for a fact, there's no way my wife is having an affair, we're far too close, in love and in life, it's about messing around in pubs.

Well, you're managing to ignore all the people who are telling you that your wife isn't messing around in pubs!

nebakanezer

Mojisola wrote: »

Well, you're managing to ignore all the people who are telling you that your wife isn't messing around in pubs!

Apologies, I just didn't want to appear 'deluded' as my sister in law so effectionately put it

duchy

Quite frankly if I was your wife I'd leave you .
I'd be saying to you-You are believing a known nutter over me and obviously don't trust me.
I wouldn't feel I had a marriage anymore .

I think you need to sort yourself out before you do any further damage to your marriage and drive your wife into having the affair you are so sure she's having.

duchy

nebakanezer wrote: »

Apologies, I just didn't want to appear 'deluded' as my sister in law so effectionately put it

Most people would believe a decent woman over a past drug addict, a woman known for causing trouble and a liar who imagines incriminating photos......................why don't you ?

It isn't just the sister in law who is having reality issues it appears.

GobbledyGook

nebakanezer wrote: »

It was about gambling, and she told her best friend her husband was spending 1000's (which he wasn't) they fell out badly and I always wondered why the friend blamed my sister in law.

The medication is extreme pain medication, which she's been addicted to in the past

She told lies about her friend's husband having a gambling problem and you wonder why the friend fell out with her?

marisco_2

nebakanezer wrote: »

perhaps I'm a little too open minded at times though!

It is very healthy to have an open mind. It enables you to look at a situation from every possible perspective, and not just blindly take the word of someone known to cause trouble in peoples relationships in the past. If your SIL genuinely knew your wife had been messing around, she would have provided solid proof of this at the time of telling you. That is to have someone's best interests at heart, and stop them from ending up torn apart by insecurity.

System

BigJockKnew wrote: »

Sounds like she's horny when she gets back from a night out.....What could be making her horny while she's out drinking?

Um alcohol?

I'm always horny after a night out but there's nothing untoward about it!