talk me down please

meritaten

mellymoo74 wrote: »

Slepwalked through today had a call me message from the shouty nephew didn't go well.
I am apparently an evil b1tch have advised that yes I am and they have not seen anything yet

Yep - if they think they can ride roughshod over Melly they have another think coming! well done you! the thing is - you really really don't care if you never see them again - so they can't hurt YOU. your OH however just wants his family to love him, and that aint much to ask is it? with normal people. But, these people ARENT normal. they seem to take enormous pleasure in hurting your OH.


and I cant help feeling that if they can cause disruption between you and OH and isolate OH from you - then that would suit them down to the ground.

mellymoo74

That's the goal.

Gonna sound like a snob but SIL has 3 kids by 3 dad's and her last boyfriend was a bloke in his 50s who still lived with his mum the fact OH and I have been together for 13 years and we are still in love is partly her problem.

My gloves are off OH is aware of this and supports me in this.

mellymoo74

They won't let him talk to his mum. Will safeguarding team be able to find out how she is and update him?

meritaten

He can ask them melly - and if his mum is willing they can update him.
Does he know the neighbours well enough to phone them and ask them to let him know when mum is on her own or in hospital. so he can visit without their knowledge?
I find this so incomprehensible - how people think they have the right to dictate WHO visits ill people. even though OH and I fell out with his brother and wife - we wouldn't have dreamed of stopping them visiting MIL. (although that was a mistake as they 'took over' and froze me and my other SIL out).
they had her admitted to hospital, even though all her care was well established and put themselves as NOK and my MIL died in there - even though she wanted to die at home. her last words to me were 'Please take me home - I don't want to die here'. I didn't like the woman, but that broke me up - I could never forgive them for that.

mellymoo74

Nope the neighbours are new.

His 'aunt' put the phone down on him, would it be worth speaking to Mcmillan as well?
Psychologist appointment Tuesday thank god.
I have repeatedly said this is not his fault tonight hopefully he believes me.
They are evil (and I don't say that lightly(

meritaten

I agree - they are behaving in an evil way. try speaking to McMillan. but, it depends on your MIL giving permission for them to update your OH. Patient confidentiality is paramount. The nurse would be risking her job if she gave information without the patients consent. but their job is to support the 'family' too. so I am sure that they would do their best to help OH.


melly - I hope OH believes you too. and perhaps its a good thing you are showing them that YOU are not to be messed with.

mellymoo74

That's the best we can hope for.

I can't understand the behaviour personally but then I am not a mental evil nasty piece of work

I will work to get him the support he needs to understand this isn't his fault and won't discuss on a open forum my future plans for the bunch of evil barstewards

mellymoo74

I should have put my foot down long ago.

MIL had expressed that they were horrible to her so mentioning that to SS tomorrow me thinks.

meritaten

melly - if MIL wants contact with your OH and they are preventing her - then you have a case under the Vulnerable Adults Act(?). and I am not entirely sure, but I think it comes in Social Services remit. Sorry, but its years ago when I took this course.

mellymoo74

And today he was allowed in.

Think it was about taking his mum's last birthday from him.