Carrot cake in the oven

giblet1979

You're definitely not the only one INOD; hope you're feeling much better today SS x

supersaver1000

Thank you wonderfuls. Yes am in a much better place thanks to you. Also caught up with an old friend and did some window shopping. It was a good antidote.

Thank you Lilster. A robot sounds good :rotfl: going to pop over now. Xx

VeronicaMars

I understand lady! Trust me!

I had written this huge response but just typing it brought back some negative feelings. Not BAD serious feeling or anything like that! But those angry/annoyed feelings you get from the Dementors when they are trying to suck your soul... :rotfl:

Sometimes I think the comments etc are out of jealousy, sometimes out of genuine concern and sometimes its just because it is not what they would do!

Repeat after me. Water off a ducks back. Water off a ducks back. Water off a ducks back!!!

I also just stopped telling everyone so much except my best friend and sister. They pass no judgement either way and are there to listen. But beware, when you stop these type of people less, they then find something else to go on about. :mad: You have been warned.

Might just be easier to move 250 miles away or to the other side of the world like I did

xoxo

Whitefeather8

liltdiddylilt wrote: »

Hope you are feeling better today flower. I wish there was a magic button for getting rid of unwanted people in your life without them noticing. Like a flush, to push them into a parallel universe where you weren't the real you but they would never know.

I am enjoying the group therapy session Supersaver :rotfl:.

I love your idea liltddidylilt, and I am fascinated by the Many Worlds Theory of quantum physics. My problem is how do you know you are the real you? With this concept I prefer to think there is a perfected master version of me and all the rest of us mini me's are making our way there :rotfl:.

in_need_of_direction

If I moved 250 miles away, my thick skinned family would come to visit and would stay! I sometimes wonder if I was left by a cuckoo as we are so different.

supersaver1000

Sorry to do that Veronica et al, I do think that moany people can get you down so I try not to do it, but this is a good release place. And you'll be pleased to know I came away with my dignity in tact. Visit over and I don't feel too guilt ridden, have done my duty and kep my dignity. So you have all moved me on one huge step.

I'd forgotten the dementors. I also love the theory Wf8 - the perfect version I am heading for. Hmm, that's a thought.

INOD our family must be related. Although the staying bit hasn't happened for ages because they now won't drive so far - it's all my fault for moving away apparently, which is more than fine with me However they will be passing close by at some point and mentioned calling in on route. Of course I will be out - I may instead call into where they are, because that worked a treat this time when I just got up and left when I'd had enough. My ears were burning after, but oh it felt good to grasp the control. Get some therapy!

The cuckoo part is funny! I've always thought I stick out like a sore thumb - although much more attractive of course.

Gibby I am going to pop by and see how you are getting on soon. X

Have a great day all. Xx

Ali-OK

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Am I the only one who thinks that there may be a link between our families undermining our self worth and overspending in pre LBMs.

This is just so spot on, a light bulb moment in itself I feel. Never being good enough, made up for in buying stuff, mostly in the home. Still, DM used to miss all that and wipe a finger along the shelf with a catty 'so when did you last dust this?' comment.

The distance thing can work, though the metaphorical elastic sprang back when DS was born. Best to just pop in to yours SS and leave when you feel like it - a good way of being in control of it all.

Group therapy the DFW/MSE way - love it

liltdiddylilt

Ah Ali - you are so right about that elastic. In the 3 years since I moved away pre-Jelly, I saw my family once, maximum twice a year for short visits, where I could take myself off and away whenever I wanted rather than them see me. Since I had Jelly, my parents deposit themselves in a hotel nearby so as not to *put on* me every 6 weeks, but in reality still appear on the doorstep every day with little notice, never any solid plans and cause me much fuss. I freak when they start cooking fry-ups in my kitchen. Mum just takes over the kitchen and cooks my dad a fried breakfast daily because they are 'on holiday' but I have shouted about stinking bacon fat one time too many and now they have hotel breakfasts too. Family are just too much. We all make this resolution not to be like our parents... I am sure Jelly will have as many issues with me when she is older.

SuperDavina :D:D well done you for coming away on your own terms with your dignity in place. Who cares what was said afterwards, the best bit is you didn't have to listen to it!! I am as always very proud of you you're getting stronger by the day you know. This diary really is a therapy session

WF I love Physics altogether, though couldn't stand it at school and was way more into Biology, but I have to admit to being completely baffled by quantum physics. If you break the ideas down into layman's terms I can just about follow it, but it still leaves me with more questions than answers. Then again, that is the fun in science.. I am a firm believer in Karma, so working my way to a better person one way or the other. I would like to believe there is a perfect version of me out there in a universe somewhere. But then, would that perfect person be very rich, or a Mother Teresa figure. See.. so many questions. I think I will settle for being imperfect but unfailingly trying to be as good as I can be with what I have

So philosophical tonight. And so many painkillers after 2 coats of paint and 2 coats of gloss, with 2 pink and 2 blue walls and a foot high skirting board, window boxing & a dado rail 8ft up the wall to contend with. Damn these victorian ceilings.

Best go to sleep. Night SS et al xx

supersaver1000

Thanks both. I was exhausted last night so was in bed early when I got home.

I think it is all about control, true LBM, as to why I spend - it's to try to get my home (and my life) under control. But also why my family have to criticise (pass comment) - to try and take some of that control back. It's a struggle back and forth. A power struggle. (Lilty they won't stay under your 'control' but will come into your home and be out of your control, so do what they like).

That's a lot to absorb. And Im not sure if I've explained it clearly. But I'm going to let that mull today.

Have a great day all, thanks for the group therapy.

Whitefeather8

Well done Supersaver for refusing to look at the world the way your family does, that takes true courage:) . It challenges their perceptions. Ultimately you have to be true to yourself or you’d go nuts.

Liltdiddylilt - Oh .... with a combination of paint fumes and pain killers, you were probably able to solve all the mysteries of the universe in your sleep last night. Is the answer 42 or 108:) , or have you forgotten?

I would love to see a thread based around these kind of subjects. Psychology, spirituality, philosophy and physics fascinate me, but I rarely meet anybody else who shares these interests, except for my DS who completely blows my mind!!!