Please can someone give me some advice. Husband left.

paddy's_mum

JIL wrote: »

"Sometimes you just have to give up on someone, not because you dont care, but because they dont".

One of the most concise and wise pieces of advice I've seen in a very long time. Thank you.

PS Hope you don't mind if I borrow it on occasion

Thegirl

Hunny, I wish this message was a hug because you are putting yourself through it.

I know you don't have any self esteem. Consequently you are allowing this person to abuse you (it is abuse, it is not just him trying to find himself). You will get out the other side. It will take time. You will get stronger.

You need to prioritse yourself and the children. If you cannot do it for yourself, do it for the children. They need stability. To be able to live undisrupted. To have a parent who prioritises them and puts them above all else. He doesn't so you must. At the moment he calls the shots. You must and for the good of your children. As you start to do this and change your mindset then everything else will change.

pixnmix_2

I totally agree with the fact that what is happening here is domestic abuse. Difficulty is, unlike physical abuse the emotional bruising isn't as visible and will take much longer to heal.
Please realise this, because you and your kids are being emotionally and systematically abused. Your self esteem is rock bottom as in the majority of women who have been abused, so you feel powerless to change anything but you must. For the sake of your children please get in touch with Women's aid, starting with browsing on their website. www.womensaid.org.uk
Only by moving away emotionally from this man will you see him for what he is. You and your children deserve and can have so much better a life - please believe in that and in yourself

mcja

No Advice for you, just hugs.

There are a lot of people on here who have offered you a lot of support, it is really important for the sake of the children,, and you, that you listen to them and stop making excuses for this 'man'.

Rottensocks

TopQuark wrote: »

I think you really need to address your weight issue as a matter of priority. As well as causing you psychological and emotional upset, it is also severely risking your physical health.

I absolutely agree with this.... The quickest way to lose several stone of useless flesh overnight is to dump your husband! I think you'll feel a WHOLE lot healthier physically and emotionally once he's gone. :T

I think the quickest way to stop him treating you like this is to cut off his funding. Weed is a non essential, so stop paying for it. Get tough my dear, stop cooking for him, let your daughter stay over - she'll soon get fed up of him when he gets ratty her, and she realises the dollars all get spend on Dad's habits, not food or clothing etc.


Be brave, and shed that surplus weight overnight my dear! :cool:

pelirocco

The easy way to lose several stones of ugly useless fat ?











Divorce him;)